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And of course, the irony is that I totally obsess over the way I look (though I'm better than I used to be), and my job contributes to the superficial mentality of our culture that I just complained about. So where the fuck do I come off even talking about this kind of thing?



There's nothing wrong with CARING about one's appearance, and usually that extends to one's health and well being, so a certain conscientiousness about one's appearance is healthy.

But obsessing over it....constantly talking about it, especially in this disingenuous way that a lot of whores do, whereby they say things like "I am ugly, I am hideous, I AM TOO FAT..." all without believing it themselves, but rather with the intent of just getting someone to tell them the opposite and fellate their ego.

I cant stand it when people are made to feel overall inferior or worthless simply because they are aesthetically challenged. Like you said Holly, it is TOTALLY out of one's control the genetic makeup we are born with and how that makes us look in general...certainly, we can do localized, limited things to improve ourselves, like lose weight, exercise, dress or groom ourselves a certain way. But let their be a boundary to the importance we put on it, with ourselves and others. You make yourself, and in turn others, miserable when you emphasize looks to such a ridiculous extent. You alienate yourself, and voila, no matter how hott you might be, you are fucking ALONE. while so called "ugly" people who you snobbishly say are "Settling" for whomever because they have to, are HAPPY and experiencing a rich full life getting the most out of a relationship with someone they TRULY care about and vice versa. Jokes on you, the would be beauty queen.

A person who puts appearance HIGH on the list of qualities they want in someone, and who thinks that how THEY look is what will determine if they snag the person they want, generally tends to be selfish and totally impossible to love and please in a relationship anyway. Avoid them....find someone with FLAWS and accept them You will be a lot happier and more secure in the relationship.

There are 80 other tangents I could follow on this topic but I am not going to... I like hot looking chicks as much as the next guy, but it neither begins nor ends there. And there are MANY MANY women I know or have known who arent exactly gorgeous or even just plain "attractive" who I would, in a heartbeat, both want to spend hours in conversation, and bang the shit out of becuae they have other qualities and traits that make them sexy beyond a pretty face or perfectly proportioned body. Who's to say what's perfect anyway?

Women tend to be more full of shit on this whole topic anyway....they claim that they want MORE to a man than appearance, or flat out say looks dont matter that much, yet prove otherwise in both who they select, how they select, and how they carry and conduct themselves.
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