McCain will win by visiting one Ohio German restaurant at at time:

"McCain Visits German Restaurant - In Columbus, Ohio

From CBS News' John Bentley:

(COLUMBUS, OHIO) – While Barack Obama was greeted by 200,000 Germans chanting “Yes we can” in Berlin, John McCain was greeting a few dozen people at a German restaurant here in Ohio.

“I’d love to give a speech in Germany – a political speech – or a speech that maybe the German people would be interested in,” McCain said at Schmidt’s Restaurant und Sausage Haus."

P.S. if Obama's an "uber-socialist", does that mean Feingold's an "uber-uber-socialist", Kucinich is an "uber-uber-uber-uber socialist", and Bernie Sanders ("a self-described democratic socialist") is an "uber-uber-uber-uber-uber socialist"?