I can't believe Brandon drove all the way out there from Canoga Pork. That's a typo and I'm leaving it. This morning was my last visit to the Janikty Internet Cafe because the nice people at Melrose Mac fixed my laptop.

When I picked up my computer, the 20-something alt looking technician guy with goatee said, "Uh...that's an interesting screen saver." I totally forgot that a photo still I took of Nikki Jayne spreading her ass open, getting dp'd was my screen saver. I apologize, "It's for my job."

Then he had me go online just to verify that all systems were a go. Great. There's my homepage- "XXXPORNTALK...Relax. It's not your daughter" pops up immediately on the screen. I'm not embarrassed, but this guy must think I'm porno central. "That's kinda for my job." Then I check my files to see if they saved all my data. All my folders have names like "Chelsea Rae Bukkake stills" and "Cumshots 6/1/08 rawjpg."

"Let me guess. Also for you job," he says flatly.

No more jankity internet cafe for me. Good riddance. My last trip was this morning where a guy outside chewing on a straw kept hissing at me. He sounded like a broken garden hose that's been patched. I have mastered the stoic-just-stare-straight-ahead-and-pretend-you-didn't-hear-anything mode since I was a bus taker in 9th grade. Eventually he yelled that I was a stuck-up bitch. Classy establishment.