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#341963 - 07/07/08 03:49 AM
Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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This place is hookers and their johns, runaway teens, and homeless people. While the kind ppl at Melrose Mac are fixing my computer, I've been using the world's most jankity internet cafe. Yesterday a girl in cut-offs sat alone at a computer and some guy asked if she knew someone. She says, "He's the one who brought me out here." Then her phone rings and she spends 20 mins in the bathrom, calls back, and says, "Ok, I freshened up. Can you come get me?" Then some other girl comes in and accuses her of stealing her lotion and calls her an ashy bitch.
Right now, a guy is threatening to fight a girl's pimp for not treating her like a lady. The girl is telling them both to shut up. She's posting on Craigslist and texting. The pimp is a white guy in a Men's Warehouse clearance suit shouting, "I DO HAVE A LOT OF RESPECT FOR WOMEN." The girl is a very attractive black girl, but apparently she does incalls at the one guy's place but not the pimp's.
I just covered my screen in a panic. "Excuse me..." It was the attractive black girl hooker asking me for a quarter.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#341964 - 07/07/08 04:23 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
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#341965 - 07/07/08 05:24 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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Jeezus G....wtf are you doing there?
Just put something nice on and go to a Decent Hotel and use their business center, the upscale places generally offer free internet use if you can convince them you look like a guest, or a high class Pro waiting for her client. They dont want to cause embarrasment or anything so if you look and act the part, you can fucking get away with anything.
Seriously, go to the W-Los Angeles at 930 Hilgard ave...their business center was easy to access, didnt require a key and had 7 or 8 'puters last time I was there. Even if they now charge, it cant be more than the jankity dive you are in now, and it will be clean, smell nice and probably have complimentary Coffee or shit.
Unless you like the jankity dive and the spectacles it offers....I could get into that ONCE, maybe twice.
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#341966 - 07/07/08 05:28 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Quote:
I have a quarter!!!
I don't think your usual pay scale will help you out here.
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#341968 - 07/07/08 06:19 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Pay phones cost more than a quarter (welcome to the 21st century), too bad the whores you hire don't.
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#341969 - 07/07/08 06:23 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
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Tsk. Tsk. You obviously haven't been to downtown LA....near the Greyhound terminal and skid row area. Now do I have to write your follow up joke, too, or would you just like to continue being a moron?
Remind me not to go car shopping with you:
have2cit to salesman: Says here the car costs $19,999 but I saw one just like it in The Fast and the Furious that looked nearly like it. I heard it was worth $150,000 so I am just going to split the difference with you and pay you $100,000, ok?
Salesman: P-p-pardon me, Sir?
have2cit: I know the price of cars just as well as I know the price of a phone call in Los Angeles. You can't get one past me, pardner. Yee haw!!!!!
salesman: Sir!!! Oh my!!! How generous of you!! But...uh...the difference is actually $130,000. If you split it, you would pay only $85,000 total. I'll waive the tax.
have2cit: My final and best offer, sir, is $100,000. Take it or leave it.
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#341970 - 07/07/08 06:41 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Quote:
In the United States, the coin rate for a local direct-dialed station-to-station call from a payphone has been 50¢ in most areas since mid-2001
from the wiki
I guess you are as stupid as you look.
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#341971 - 07/07/08 06:46 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
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I am smart enough to not believe everything I read.
Listen, my friend, there are pay phones in downtown Los Angeles today that cost a quarter. I don't care what wiki says. I've seen them with my own eyes less than 2 weeks ago when I visited Brian Surewood at Men's Central Jail near Union Station.
Go buy your car already! Or do you wait until wiki tells you to?
Tell me you come from German heritage and your forefathers believed the Nazi propaganda, please! It was the "wiki" of the time and you seem really unquestioning of authority. Now goose-step your way into a BMW dealer so you can drive (and grossly overpay) for the finest in German engineering.
$100,000....final offer!!
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#341972 - 07/07/08 06:53 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Quote:
In the United States, the coin rate for a local direct-dialed station-to-station call from a payphone has been 50¢ in most areas since mid-2001
I guess I just don't hang out in those swanky slums like you, and just because the booth has been there since 1980 doesn't mean the phone still charges the same rate. You are as stupid as you are bald.
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#341974 - 07/07/08 07:02 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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According to the article, they're selling off all their phones.
And now, to further de-rail the de-rail:
Like the rest of the country, Brazilian payphones are fucking GAY.
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#341975 - 07/07/08 07:02 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Quote:
Yeah, that's how Bell made all that money. You sucker them in with a sign that says "Phone Calls 25 Cents" and then you jack it wa-a-a-ay up to 35 or 50.
Phone toll conspiracy theories?? You are one twisted fuck.
How about this, you jack the price up, but don't invest more in a dwindling market by upgrading the signage on the booths, that are already in vandal prone areas? I know it's too simple, but simple is your middle name.
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#341977 - 07/07/08 07:08 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Keep fucking the nasty skanks, so we don't have to, you herpes factory.
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#341979 - 07/07/08 07:26 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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You've mistaken for Cryan who rims your ass constantly. I would however be willing to jam a mop in your ass then break it off, but I would have to charge $25, I know it's 25 times more than your normal pay scale, but think about it.
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#341981 - 07/07/08 07:29 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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Fucking prick is standing in front of the crippled access phone. Gotta be one of Smartt's relative. I wonder if Gia knew this thread would turn into a stick fight? Pretty good one too...H2C is reigning champ, but gotta give Brando some points too.
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#341982 - 07/07/08 07:31 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Quote:
How many phone calls is that? I'm confused.
About the same as the number of hairs remaining on your scalp.
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#341984 - 07/07/08 07:58 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Those are also the symptoms of anabolic steroid abuse, thanks for outing yourself. Like I'd drive a car designed by Nazi's.  Why do you need her info, you couldn't afford her anyway?
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#341985 - 07/07/08 09:13 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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ADT regular
Registered: 07/07/08
Posts: 6
Loc: Australia.. and no... that dos...
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Crikies this place looks like hang shit central....
I think i should stay out of here....
LOL
P.S. Hello Gia, Hello Brandon !!!!!!
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#341987 - 07/07/08 09:19 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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ADT regular
Registered: 07/07/08
Posts: 6
Loc: Australia.. and no... that dos...
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Quick you better call the porn police!!
They might save you mate......
Otherwise i might let you leave quietly if you say sorry...
P.S Yes that is me 
Ban me now while you have the chance..... MOD 
Edited by LexRated (07/07/08 09:41 AM)
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#341988 - 07/07/08 10:34 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 4856
Loc: The 4th International
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What's wrong with your finger? Did you just pull it from some guy's ass?
_________________________
The only thing you got that I want, is your suffering.
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#341990 - 07/07/08 01:38 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Bitch, my mop services are only for you and it will still cost you the $25. Finished injecting those steroids? Don’t forget the caverject either. You need to get those veins popping for the shoot tonight and don’t forget to burst at least some of the zits on your back.
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#341991 - 07/07/08 01:46 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
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Roid rage much? Dose down, dude. DOWN!!
Next time you want to mop something up, be the errand boy for www.spermcocktail.com
Whatever spills from the girl's mouth is yours!
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#341992 - 07/07/08 01:52 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Still crying as what remains of your comb over slowly brushes off your scalp and washes down the drain? Don't be sad, get mad all 4'2" 200 lbs of you.
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#341994 - 07/07/08 02:05 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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I'm also a doctor and if there is ever an outbreak of herpes, through the air transmission, I’m positive you will be patient zero.
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#341996 - 07/07/08 02:55 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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You crack me up you’re like a toothless pitbull without the brains and much less rationale.
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#341998 - 07/07/08 05:34 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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I wonder if, for the briefest of moments, as the pulsating peni pumped prick porridge into her mouth, she felt as vicariously sexy and beautiful as, say, Giselle Bundchen? I also wonder if the real Giselle let's Tom Brady do this?
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#341999 - 07/07/08 05:34 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 01/18/06
Posts: 1283
Loc: SoCal
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Yes, Gia. You're in a Cyber Cafe, use your webcam!
Pix or it dinit happen, girl. <snap>[w/headwag]
_________________________
I'd rather be ignorant than stupid.
Ignorance implies a lack of knowledge which is easily correctable through education.
Stupidity implies an inability to learn.
Therefore; ignorance is temporary, stupidity is forever!
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#342006 - 07/07/08 07:24 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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For the love of God, NO!!!
Jankity Craigslist hookers at an internet cafe? You're talking about The Adventures of Sammura Shane and the Gangster of Herp.
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#342007 - 07/07/08 07:50 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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@
Porn Jesus
Registered: 10/19/06
Posts: 9958
Loc: fortified
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It seems like "The Gangster of Herp" needs a sidekick (looks at Cxxx). Whatev.
_________________________
i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#342008 - 07/07/08 08:02 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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I thought that's why he had Cr%@n "Deputy Droopalong" Kn*x?
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#342011 - 07/07/08 09:26 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Quote:
When I said I had a quarter, I meant that it should go to the young lady.....so she could call you and tell you she was going to be sucking and swallowing very soon at www.loadmymouth.com
Of course, Brandon was probably the dirty john...ahem, producer...on the other line when the one girl came out of the bathroom after "freshening up".
Give the girl some credit, you Herp-filled bloke. Pay the $1.75 difference to ensure she gets minimum wage for whores!
Quote:
Crikies this place looks like hang shit central....
I think i should stay out of here....
LOL
P.S. Hello Gia, Hello Brandon !!!!!!
FWIW, this isn't ADT, banning isn't a daily occurance 'Lex'.
Gia, this fan isn't going to whine about the fact you won't fuck the negros, is he?
_________________________
Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#342012 - 07/07/08 10:31 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
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Gia, sorry, but I have to cancel on meeting up with you tonight. I did double duty today for www.loadmymouth.com ....and loved it!
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#342014 - 07/08/08 06:01 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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They wouldn't take the money you offered, what a shock.
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#342016 - 07/08/08 07:07 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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ADT regular
Registered: 07/07/08
Posts: 6
Loc: Australia.. and no... that dos...
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Quote:
Quote:
Crikies this place looks like hang shit central....
I think i should stay out of here....
LOL
P.S. Hello Gia, Hello Brandon !!!!!!
Hey, Lex! Glad to see you've finally joined. Guys, Lex is one of my fans. Lex, just post porn stuff and have fun for a while. Don't pick fights with anyone here until you get to know them; the herd is always hungry. This ain't ADT. Banning someone for no reason takes the fun out of the gun fight.
Yes yes..Fan i am!!
Thanks for the warm welcome.....and advice
You know that id much rather have some fun than fight anyday...
haha
I was being sarcastic towards mr zen...
Ive had some serious laughs so far though.......:)
P.S. Gia your scene in Feeding Frenzy still gets played quite often im my player... im hoping for an update sometime soon.... And whats this about negro guys... you know as one page turns another chapter begins...haha
Edited by LexRated (07/08/08 07:12 AM)
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#342017 - 07/08/08 07:40 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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ADT regular
Registered: 07/07/08
Posts: 6
Loc: Australia.. and no... that dos...
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Quote:
I had a change of heart and decided to go make some new friends. The place was jolly yet not productive for my purposes.
hahahha.........
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#342018 - 07/08/08 07:53 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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#342019 - 07/08/08 09:29 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/26/03
Posts: 8160
Loc: Roma, Repubblica Italiana
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#342021 - 07/08/08 11:08 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Fabulous, Willie.
_________________________
Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#342022 - 07/08/08 05:44 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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I can't believe Brandon drove all the way out there from Canoga Pork. That's a typo and I'm leaving it. This morning was my last visit to the Janikty Internet Cafe because the nice people at Melrose Mac fixed my laptop.
When I picked up my computer, the 20-something alt looking technician guy with goatee said, "Uh...that's an interesting screen saver." I totally forgot that a photo still I took of Nikki Jayne spreading her ass open, getting dp'd was my screen saver. I apologize, "It's for my job."
Then he had me go online just to verify that all systems were a go. Great. There's my homepage- "XXXPORNTALK...Relax. It's not your daughter" pops up immediately on the screen. I'm not embarrassed, but this guy must think I'm porno central. "That's kinda for my job." Then I check my files to see if they saved all my data. All my folders have names like "Chelsea Rae Bukkake stills" and "Cumshots 6/1/08 rawjpg."
"Let me guess. Also for you job," he says flatly.
No more jankity internet cafe for me. Good riddance. My last trip was this morning where a guy outside chewing on a straw kept hissing at me. He sounded like a broken garden hose that's been patched. I have mastered the stoic-just-stare-straight-ahead-and-pretend-you-didn't-hear-anything mode since I was a bus taker in 9th grade. Eventually he yelled that I was a stuck-up bitch. Classy establishment.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#342023 - 07/08/08 06:46 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/11/06
Posts: 5287
Loc: Anchorage, Alaska
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Quote:
No more jankity internet cafe for me. Good riddance. My last trip was this morning where a guy outside chewing on a straw kept hissing at me. He sounded like a broken garden hose that's been patched. I have mastered the stoic-just-stare-straight-ahead-and-pretend-you-didn't-hear-anything mode since I was a bus taker in 9th grade. Eventually he yelled that I was a stuck-up bitch. Classy establishment.
I know you were mostly staring straight ahead, but did he look mediterranean? Hissing is a very common way for Greeks to sexually harass women.
Also, I think you only started this thread as an excuse to use the term jankity a few more times. You've managed to ingrain it into my vocabulary. When a friend had his asbcessed tooth pulled the other day, I asked him if he got to keep his jankity tooth.
Edited by Steezo (07/08/08 06:49 PM)
_________________________
"Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars." - Martin Luther King, Jr.
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#342024 - 07/08/08 06:58 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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No, he wasn't Mediterranian. If you visited this internet place, you'd be saying jankity the entire time. I won't even use the bathroom there. They apparently sell coffee and food, too. Gross.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#342025 - 07/08/08 07:47 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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Quote:
...Eventually he yelled that I was a stuck-up bitch.
Well, in a way you are. After hanging out with all us high class folks on XPT it's hard to make that step backwards to the internet cafe and guys that hiss like komodo dragons.
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#342028 - 07/09/08 12:43 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Registered Sex Offender
Registered: 03/12/03
Posts: 2458
Loc: I'm the fucker behind the curt...
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Quote:
No, he wasn't Mediterranian. If you visited this internet place, you'd be saying jankity the entire time. I won't even use the bathroom there. They apparently sell coffee and food, too. Gross.
Was he black? Is he aim tested and available on the 16th?
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#342029 - 07/10/08 08:44 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Couch-casting for the next "She's got a negro problem", Tony?
_________________________
Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#342030 - 08/06/08 10:01 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Look...Pink is driving outside the internet cafe.
Image by Bauer-Griffin.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#342032 - 08/06/08 10:12 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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O HAI...IM PICKIN UP HOEZ. For shizzle, my crunk dizzle.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#342033 - 08/07/08 12:58 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 03/29/08
Posts: 1991
Loc: colorado
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you are like the best story teller gia i totally have to know whats gonna happen next: will ashy get caught with other girls lotion and get a beat down? will the pimp whip open his cheap sharkskin blazer to reveal a poorly tattooed torso, brandishing his glock? will the jankity internet drive gia jordan, porngirldeluxe, out of the ghetto internet cafe? these and other important questions answered next week on " the sleepless and xpt" love, pretty
_________________________
"Should send her our way, XPT could REALLY get her warmed up for any kind of abuse she might get later. "- nugent
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#342034 - 08/07/08 09:38 PM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/07/06
Posts: 4268
Loc: Portland
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Again, typing "like" is worthy of me turning on my hose and yelling at youse kids:
"Gets off my damn lawn!"
_________________________
"My people (the real Americans- descended from the original Angle-Saxon pioneers)"-Coke S.
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#342035 - 08/08/08 03:40 AM
Re: Internet Cafe on Sunset/La Brea
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Pervert
Registered: 09/06/03
Posts: 2042
Loc: Ceara's bunny cage
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Quote:
I can't believe Brandon drove all the way out there from Canoga Pork. That's a typo and I'm leaving it. This morning was my last visit to the Janikty Internet Cafe because the nice people at Melrose Mac fixed my laptop.
Was Brandon driving Jeff's car?
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0 registered (),
332
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Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
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