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#291433 - 12/20/07 12:11 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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thank you. 
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"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#291434 - 12/20/07 12:17 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/06
Posts: 7863
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#291436 - 12/20/07 12:30 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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oh, and before anyone goes and puts my picture up in the "mother of the year" thread again, i have to tell you that i only had those things on my tree for the five minutes it took to take the picture. i had to take down two jesus ornaments to make room, now i'm for sure going to hell. 
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"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#291441 - 12/20/07 11:27 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Icon
Registered: 01/27/06
Posts: 3440
Loc: Jaundice Town
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the Bukkake Balls could also be seen as dead angels...with the mouths seen as halos...i mean if you need to explain them to the family.
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#291443 - 12/21/07 10:18 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 03/22/06
Posts: 6557
Loc: 2004 - the glory days
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that's my favorite Simpsons episode ever. not tracy ullman old school, but old school enough and hilarious as hell as they shock the shit out of each other. homer's acid trip from eating the hot pepper is the runner up, imo.
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"You are the worst poster in xpt yet I can't stop talking about you" - smelly monkey
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#291444 - 12/24/07 07:47 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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FINALLY...I got Gigi's ornaments today on Christmas Eve. They were delivered Saturday, but I had to pick them up at the post office since I wasn't home and my mailbox was too small. So, I stand in line for 45 minutes- yes, I got there at opening so shut your asses about porn whores doing everything last minute.
I get DENIED at the counter. My name on my id didn't match the 'gia jordan' the package was addressed to. I politely explained that it was a stage name, and again, they reiterated in a civil servant robot-like fashion that my id didn't match the name on the package. I told them that the sender does not know my real name. They told me they would re-send my package after Christmas. I wasn't backing down.
"I could get one of my movies from the car, but I don't think they would be appropriate for here." By then someone was yelling in Spanish and I split with the box.
There it was after I tore open the box!!! The WHY WHY WHY ornaments, an ornament that was probably from Pottery Barn but looked like a buttplug, and a White Trash Whore trailer ornament!!! Thank you, thank you, thank you, Gigi! Did anyone else get their pressies in baby blue flocked velvet cases? I dids. I also got some pomegranate seeds. I told Gigi to use popcorn instead of those styroform things for packing because I'm from Seattle and sustainable is how we roll. Merry Christmas!
Attachments
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"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#291446 - 12/24/07 08:56 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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The bukkake gingerbreadmen are on my tree. Forgot to get them in the pic. My friends asked me why they were upside down.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#291447 - 12/24/07 08:57 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 03/22/06
Posts: 6557
Loc: 2004 - the glory days
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the white trash whore trailer is hilarious
_________________________
"You are the worst poster in xpt yet I can't stop talking about you" - smelly monkey
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#291448 - 12/26/07 12:14 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
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Those are the single best Christmas decorations I've ever seen. And the best part is that so few people outside porn or this board would have a clue what they meant.
I bow to you, Gigi. Outstanding work.
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I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH
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#291449 - 12/26/07 01:40 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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next year will be my "max hardcore christmas" series of ornaments. i've already stocked up on unfinished dollhouse couches and yellow paint. 
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#291451 - 12/29/07 08:28 AM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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it really did look kind of like a bejeweled buttplug; i got it because my favorite gia-ism of all time is "blinging out your anus is the new black."
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#291453 - 01/16/08 06:46 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 9184
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Quote:
someone suggested a sasha grey anal wart gingerbread bukkake ornament. i tried it in bundt cake form, ass creampie style 'cause that's how i roll.
Can you make Rice Krispie treats in a bundt pan? Just wondering.
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#291456 - 12/04/08 12:27 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 08/22/08
Posts: 109
Loc: A seedy den of moral turpitude
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#291458 - 12/04/08 12:57 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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thanks. not done with it yet... if i don't get too lazy i'm going to make it into a gangbang scene in a manger.
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#291459 - 12/04/08 04:23 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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@
Porn Jesus
Registered: 10/19/06
Posts: 9958
Loc: fortified
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Can you make the manger scene IR and write "Lou's Wife" on the doll. Also maybe baby Jesus could be resting peacefully under one of the boys Tonka Trucks. Hopefully that will send panzer-tard into a mastubatory coma that he never comes out of.
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i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#291460 - 12/04/08 05:36 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Human Garbage
Registered: 03/14/08
Posts: 1613
Loc: Liqour Hole, Kentucky
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#291461 - 12/04/08 05:49 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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#291466 - 12/04/08 11:30 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/12/05
Posts: 7322
Loc: The Children's Limbo
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Okay, that last one is a job well done.
_________________________
I hit her with the hammer on top of the head. She made a lot of noise and kept on making noise, so I hit her again.
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#291468 - 12/05/08 02:28 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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 Maybe you need to go have your eyes checked at lenscrafters.
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#291469 - 12/05/08 02:28 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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@
Porn Jesus
Registered: 10/19/06
Posts: 9958
Loc: fortified
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burn
_________________________
i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#291472 - 12/05/08 11:13 PM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/07/06
Posts: 4268
Loc: Portland
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No.
There are no wheelchair marks.
I learned this from the last episode of "Pushing Daisies."
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"My people (the real Americans- descended from the original Angle-Saxon pioneers)"-Coke S.
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#291473 - 12/06/08 12:02 AM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Quote:
I get DENIED at the counter. My name on my id didn't match the 'gia jordan' the package was addressed to. I politely explained that it was a stage name, and again, they reiterated in a civil servant robot-like fashion that my id didn't match the name on the package. I told them that the sender does not know my real name. They told me they would re-send my package after Christmas. I wasn't backing down.
A porn whore neighbor of mine had the same problem earlier this year. She had to add her stage name to the list of acceptable addresses that could pick up her (fan) mail.
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Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#291476 - 12/06/08 03:34 AM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Sex Slave Trader
Registered: 11/14/04
Posts: 1460
Loc: Down there
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Quote:
No.
There are no wheelchair marks.
I learned this from the last episode of "Pushing Daisies."
Quote:
I generally never make such a mess, especially if it is in my own place. On the other hand, I am more likely to treat a woman I am actually in a relationship in the manner depicted in this staged photo, as opposed to a whore-for-hire. Also, if this were me, the only evidence of splooge would be burping from the whore and mirror with lines would be replaced with an empty pill bottle.....and there would be a stevie nicks CD and poster somewhere in the picture.
I should have been more clear. This whore (after burg has used her for all he thinks she's worth) goes into a tailspin and the end result is she only thinks she's worth bukkake parties, including dwarfs. Hence, the mini cowboy hat.
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I like me some Gia'd Jerkins.
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#291478 - 12/06/08 09:57 AM
Re: Thank You Gigi............
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
gia posted:Quote:
an ornament that was probably from Pottery Barn...
i just reread this and it hit me that she was probs. insulting me and i didn't even notice until now
Pottery Barn has beautiful Christmas stuff. It was a compliment.
I thought you said Big Lots was better... 
She said "cheaper" not better. Pottery Barn has some awesome stuff.
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