Burg...again brilliant. And I'm not up to thinking enough to answer anyone else's suggestions right now. So here's mine;

1) Max Hardcore is to a community college drop out as;

a) As crack is to a teenage pothead.

b) As pegging is to Kurt Lockwood.

c) As Dave Naz is to Ashley blue.

2) Belladonna's decision making skills are to parenting;

a) As Shelly Lubben's god is to porn whores.

b) As Brandon Iron is to the self esteem of crack whores.

c) As watching Carley Parker meltdown while swallowing the splooge of numerous unknown convicts is to the goal of achieving an orgasm.

I'll work on everyone else's after the weekend. Off to LA land for a few days.