I have a relatively inexpensive solution to your transformer dilemma.
Between now and wednesday,locate and purchase an early 80's Audi 5000s with an automatic transmission.Given their history and age you should be able to find one still running that the owner will be willing to pay YOU to remove from his driveway. Use that money to buy trannyshoes.(I dont know why but some places sell patent leather pumps in man sizes... I am certain that the world would be a better place if anyone who even inquired about a red leather pump in a man's size 11 would be seated while the salesperson went and got a box that contained not red shoes,but a 12gauge sawed off and held it right up to it's face and...)I'm sorry I got sidetracked. Buy trannyshoes and put them in the trunk of your "new" 1981 Audi 5000s and go to the party.
Have a good time and when your are ready to leave announce that you almost forgot ,there is a gift for your wife's mngr out in the car, could it please walk you out? Then go outside and start warming up you trusty Audi.
When it comes out to the car you will want to be careful to slip the shifter to D for drive and pop the trunk.(this part is important because this vehical is known for having.... issues related to shifting)When mantastic gets around back ,just tap the gas and everybody is happy.
The police that jack up you car to remove the tattered tranny pieces wont even give you a breathylizer....