"My Son And His Friends Will Never Find My Secret Playboy Stash"

http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/my_son_and_his_friends_will

I used to turn the house upside down but my Dad never had porn. I always felt cheated by that.

What I always hated about Playboys when I was a young teen(other than the fact the other mags actually showed vagina and had hot chicks that didn't all look like Barbie dolls who went overboard on the plastic surgery and... let me get back on track), was the fact that my hands always ended up smelling like the cologne sample ads they put in there. Well, that smell combined with the musty basement odor on top of it.

getting my hands on a HUSTLER mag was a revelation. But come to think of the fuckers at the Crown Books who sold it to me at a waay too young age...sick bastards!!