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I take offense to the phonograph line. I spun a couple of my vinyl albums this morning at high volume and I swear I have a few leg-spreaders in my collection.

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Here he is practicing for his Metrosexual/Gay Marriage bachelor party clients while listening to Depeche Mode's "Dreaming of Me" blasting from his 1995 Saturn's car stereo parked next to the door of his Super 8 motel room...on a rainy Tuesday Morning after he ate a two Denny's grand Slam breakfasts and 5 Slim Jims. I dont know, nor want to know what he plans on "sacrificing" ...