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#284266 - 10/27/07 01:36 PM
Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 07/28/07
Posts: 1133
Loc: The Mystic Knights of the Sea ...
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I was at the Heaven & Hell Halloween Bash at Boulevard3 in Hollywood last night which was awash in porn people; which would seem appropriate as it was an adult industry produced red carpet event.
Throughout the night the following occurred:
I met XPTer Monstar, a nice and charming gentleman.
I met the delightful whores: Ava Rose, Mia Rose and Jenny Hendrix; each looking sexy in outfits that I can't seem to recall. I think Ava was dressed as a witch. Mia was wearing high heels so extreme, she was like a ballerina walking around en pointe. Each whore was warm and friendly. If these girls are a representation of porn's future, then that future looks bright.
I also met XPTer pornlaw. Because our meeting was brief, I was unable to inquire if Brian Surewood would be getting a prison production of The Pirates of Penzance on its feet. Nor was I able to suggest that esteemed attorney and fellow The Mystic Knights of the Sea Lodge member, Algonquin J. Calhoun, be hired for the Surewood legal team.
For you IR enthusiasts, there was some off-the-clock IR canoodling. It appears some whores actually do this in real life, not just for a bump in scene pay.
Early in the night I ran into XPT fav: Baby Gia Jordan. I recognized her from some pictures recently posted here on XPT and introduced myself. She was looking sexy in a black 'Captain Save-A-Ho' uniform. Gia was contracted to take pictures of whores in Halloween costumes. Because this event was open to the public at large, it was difficult -- even for a seasoned pro like Gia -- to separate professional whores from civilian Halloween faux-whores. This is similar to the problem our troops face in Iraq everyday: determining the insurgent from the indigenous, except that if Gia guesses wrong, the faux-whore doesn't explode and kill her.
Powered only by a single banana eaten earlier in the day and a continuous stream of Ketel One vodka rocks [Editor's note: actually number of vodka drinks consumed throughout the night was four], Gia, armed with her big ass camera, went hunting for whores. If she was uncertain about a whore's status: real or faux, she would sometimes ask benignly: Are you in porn or sometimes ask more aggressively: Are you a whore?
Later in the evening, I, The Kingfish was drafted by Gia to be an assistant. In the VIP section on the club's mezzanine level, Gia was told that picture taking was not allowed after 1 am. Baby G, one to play by her own rules, defies such silly restrictions to ensure that as many whores as humanly possible were captured on Flash memory for worldwide consumption. I abetted Gia's felonious shutterbuggery by acting as lookout and warning about any approaching security personnel. Realizing that all work and no play makes Gia a boring girl, she was shaking her ass to the music in between shots.
The reason I met everybody above was due to Gia's gracious introductions to those people. Otherwise, I would have no fucking clue what they looked like in person. Thanks Gia.
_________________________
"I'm a minor character in my own story", Steve Coogan as Tony Wilson in 24 Hour Party People
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#284269 - 10/27/07 01:56 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/14/06
Posts: 14755
Loc: Busy downloading [LEGALLY!]
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Exactly.
He went to a porn party and met Gia FUCKING Jordan!!!
Ava & Mia MOTHERFUCKING Rose!!!
Mon*, the LEGEND, and soon-to-be papa!!
And, PornLaw!!! Don't forget PornLaw!
And, overly tattooed losers like that Ryan Knox guy were as scarce as his employment opportunities!!
FUCKING GREAT!!!!
I bet Mia looked GREAT!!
_________________________
Amo i Gemelli!!
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#284271 - 10/27/07 02:00 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Broccoli Buy Piss Mop
Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 10/25/05
Posts: 1802
Loc: Getting pissed on
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I'm sorry, I just didn't see a point to the story. Fatman, can you guess wich of these sisters I've Fucked? Is it Ava? Mia? Or Both?
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#284273 - 10/27/07 02:08 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/14/06
Posts: 14755
Loc: Busy downloading [LEGALLY!]
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I don't watch those 10 to 1 kind of films, so I really wouldn't know. I just checked IAFD and they don't have any matches, but they don't have the .com site scenes - just DVD movies. But, I do know that porn subjects these poor lasses to ALL KINDS of indignities.
_________________________
Amo i Gemelli!!
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#284277 - 10/27/07 02:33 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/14/06
Posts: 14755
Loc: Busy downloading [LEGALLY!]
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They most surely have!! That's the purpose of a porn girl, no???
_________________________
Amo i Gemelli!!
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#284280 - 10/27/07 02:41 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Broccoli Buy Piss Mop
Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 10/25/05
Posts: 1802
Loc: Getting pissed on
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Quote:
Kyle Stone pop and Ryana no....retire broccoli, retire
Your people cost the least
$20 Bucks a girl in Tijuana
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#284281 - 10/27/07 03:08 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/14/06
Posts: 14755
Loc: Busy downloading [LEGALLY!]
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Ryan: He's PUERTO RICAN NOT MEXICAN!
Other than a similarity in language, they have NOTHING in common.
_________________________
Amo i Gemelli!!
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#284282 - 10/27/07 03:15 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Bukkake Boy
Registered: 02/20/06
Posts: 720
Loc: "Mia mothafuckin ROSE" ... ind...
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Answer... You haven't fucked either of us, to our knowledge... So.... I really honestly do not intend to sound at all diva, or cunt-ish... But, could you please go hijack a different thread?
Also... King, pleasure meeting you. Had a blast last night. First time me and Ava have gone out together in a long time...
I will be going with her " more like I begged like porn-actor-for-hire to be able to tag along" to the party she is hosting with Marylin Manson tonight!!! Fuck... I'm a star struck porn whore when it comes to this man.... weirdo wearing make up or not... he pwns! :: calming down ::
carry on
_________________________
"What business is it of yours what I do, read, buy, see, say, think, who I fuck, what I take into my body - as long as I do not harm another human being on this planet?"B. hicks
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#284286 - 10/27/07 03:32 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
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Quote:
So what? You went to a porn party and met Gia Jordan?
Whoopdie Fucking Doo!
what is your infatuation w/Gia? the fact that she wouldnt piss on you if you were on fire, yup I bet thats it. She hates you dude, face it. Dont talk shit about her cause she hates you, get the fuck over it and move the fuck on or out of your parents home.
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#284289 - 10/27/07 04:12 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
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Quote:
Quote:
what is your infatuation w/Gia? the fact that she wouldnt piss on you if you were on fire,
Don't let it get you down though. There are plenty of other whores out there who would be willing to piss on you even if you weren't on fire.
OHHHH I know there are many, but NONE of Gia's caliber, that is where the "HATE" comes from, she would step over him begging for change, he's a fuckin bum. That is why he hates her sooo much, she could be starving, behind rent and had to go to a very expensive important doctors appt. she would STILL NEVER EVER go near this Knox lunafuckingtic. And knowing that give me great satisfaction. I have seen his male bukkake and its fuckin priceless, not for the sex but for the utter umiliation, its definitely worth watching.
P.S. Plus I think Gia is a very smart woman and saves money and doesnt spend all her money on bags, shoes and whore clothing. She is an actual responsible woman and that is why I look up to her, if anyone should be a role model it should be her, not that whore Jenna, who is one or two pounds away from disappearance.
EDITED FOR FUCKING TYPOS, A HUGE PET PEEVE OF MINE, Especially now that Im sober.
Edited by RENFIELD (10/27/07 04:18 PM)
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#284290 - 10/27/07 04:20 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/05/05
Posts: 4468
Loc: Great America
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Quote:
Quote:
Kyle Stone pop and Ryana no....retire broccoli, retire
Your people cost the least
$20 Bucks a girl in Tijuana
puerto ricans guys can pop and Ryana no.... retire broccoli, retire....
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#284291 - 10/27/07 04:30 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Broccoli Buy Piss Mop
Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 10/25/05
Posts: 1802
Loc: Getting pissed on
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Quote:
Answer... You haven't fucked either of us, to our knowledge
Are there are a lot of guys that have fucked you without your knowledge? No Hijacking here, just fans and whores kissing eachother's ass.
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#284292 - 10/27/07 04:33 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Broccoli Buy Piss Mop
Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 10/25/05
Posts: 1802
Loc: Getting pissed on
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Quote:
Quote:
So what? You went to a porn party and met Gia Jordan?
Whoopdie Fucking Doo!
what is your infatuation w/Gia? the fact that she wouldnt piss on you if you were on fire, yup I bet thats it. She hates you dude, face it. Dont talk shit about her cause she hates you, get the fuck over it and move the fuck on or out of your parents home.
It's called a joke, like your infatuation with her, she's not even in the Biz so I could really care less.
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#284293 - 10/27/07 04:41 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/14/06
Posts: 14755
Loc: Busy downloading [LEGALLY!]
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Ryan: Why do you hate so many porn girls? Do you hate just the girls you didn't work with or do you hate girls like PopWhore, too??
_________________________
Amo i Gemelli!!
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#284295 - 10/27/07 05:00 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Bukkake Boy
Registered: 02/20/06
Posts: 720
Loc: "Mia mothafuckin ROSE" ... ind...
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Just a guess, but this thread is headed toward :: fail :: ...fast.
Back on subject.... : cough Gia Jordan has photos cough :
_________________________
"What business is it of yours what I do, read, buy, see, say, think, who I fuck, what I take into my body - as long as I do not harm another human being on this planet?"B. hicks
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#284296 - 10/27/07 05:01 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/14/06
Posts: 14755
Loc: Busy downloading [LEGALLY!]
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So, Mia ... How hot were you???
_________________________
Amo i Gemelli!!
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#284298 - 10/28/07 09:58 AM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 09/08/07
Posts: 39
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some good costumes - chewbacca was my favorite
_________________________
Put a condom in your ear and fuck what ya heard...
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#284303 - 10/28/07 06:05 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
So what? You went to a porn party and met Gia Jordan?
Whoopdie Fucking Doo!
what is your infatuation w/Gia? the fact that she wouldnt piss on you if you were on fire, yup I bet thats it. She hates you dude, face it. Dont talk shit about her cause she hates you, get the fuck over it and move the fuck on or out of your parents home.
It's called a joke, like your infatuation with her, she's not even in the Biz so I could really care less.
I have an infatuation with no one except Mr. Johnny Depp (the real one). I just respect her and think she's a really nice woman, smart, classy dresser, well rounded and sober, all things you could never acquire. You on the other hand are a piece of shit, NO HARD ON faggot who can not even get on bukkake sets without begging and pleading. So why dont you quit now loser? Actually wait, dont quit, I love watching the others here humiliate you.
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#284305 - 10/28/07 09:21 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Pervert
Registered: 07/05/05
Posts: 2134
Loc: Los Angeles, CA
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Quote:
Quote:
So is Taryn Thomas.
I bet Taryn Thomas is making way more money in her profession than I do taking photos, though I get to keep my clothes on and order people around.
thats false gia. trust me.
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#284306 - 10/29/07 05:17 AM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 03/28/04
Posts: 4450
Loc: The Planet Houston
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Quote:
I met XPTer Monstar, a nice and charming gentleman.
...dood you can say it, I was kinda smashed.
buying a native drinks + full moon =
but good to meet you none the less...
some pix i dug up:
XPT's own Mia Rose
Chewbacca. I told kelly to keep giving him drinks. Before i die i would like to see a drunk wookie.
Star Factory's own Gianna Lynn.
Star Factory's own Nikita Denise, who whispered 'moose & squirrel' into my ear.
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#284309 - 10/30/07 11:33 AM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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AVN has put up the gallery of my pictures from the event! Evie Delatosso See the gallery here!
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#284310 - 10/30/07 11:36 AM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Pervert
Registered: 04/21/04
Posts: 2204
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Quote:
...dood you can say it, I was kinda smashed.
nigga grown men dont talk like 14 year old bitches doooooood.
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#284312 - 10/30/07 11:44 AM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Pervert
Registered: 04/21/04
Posts: 2204
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Quote:
you may have a point. but for some reason i can't bring myslef to type 'dude'.
should drop it all together. fuckin' so-cal.
yessur
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#284313 - 10/30/07 11:54 AM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Bonus points to those who find the pic of me in my Captain Save-A-Ho uniform.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#284315 - 10/30/07 12:01 PM
Re: Heaven & Hell Halloween Party
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 03/28/04
Posts: 4450
Loc: The Planet Houston
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Quote:
Bonus points to those who find the pic of me in my Captain Save-A-Ho uniform.
that was good shit....
ava looks stunned...
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