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#265804 - 08/09/07 09:40 PM
Jessica Alba gets the clap
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Human Garbage
Registered: 06/23/06
Posts: 1557
Loc: New York
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Quote:
We’re going to apologize in advance to all the straight men out there, for ruining their Jessica Alba fantasies, but here goes…..
Jessica Alba(before she was Jessica Alba) used to date Derek Jeter, the serial celebrity dater, who plays for the NY Yankees. Well, our source who worked for one of their camps, had to refill her Valtrex prescription for her on a regular basis! Guess who she got it from…that’s right…dirty Derek Jeter.
You know what this means don’t YOU?!! All of his other famous relationships could have contracted the STD TOO! Derek’s most famous sexual conquest include Mariah Carey, Jessica Alba, Vanessa Minnillo and most recently Jessica Biel. Which means JT could have it AAAHHH!!
LADIES STOP SLEEPING WITH DEREK JETER!! 70% of all spreading happens when there is no sign of an outbreak ( we heard on the commercial, we don’t study Herpes or anything like that.)
It’s snarky we know but we’re doing this as a community service to Hollywood, to warn the rest of you young starlets to stay away from those baseball guys cuz they are DIR - TY!!!
But then again, who doesn’t have herpes in Hollywood, right?
Highly Dubious Source
And here I thought he and AROD were gay!
_________________________
"This thing is ready to do damage!"
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#265805 - 08/09/07 09:58 PM
Re: Jessica Alba gets the clap
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 01/09/06
Posts: 1248
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Quote:
( we heard on the commercial, we don’t study Herpes or anything like that.)
Hahahaha, what a stupid place to defend yourself. "We're not smart or anything, we just saw it on TV."
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#265806 - 08/10/07 09:04 AM
Re: Jessica Alba gets the clap
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 02/23/05
Posts: 3724
Loc: Paddling my canoe in the wild
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Thanks for the tip!
She's in Vancouver filming The Eye as we speak. Out of an abundance of caution, I WILL wear a condom if I am afforded an opportunity to have relations with her.
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You're all still alive?
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#265807 - 08/10/07 11:20 AM
Re: Jessica Alba gets the clap
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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I though 'the clap' was old people jargon for gono or clmyd. Why are you calling herpes that?
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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