From Lukeisback.com:

Mary Carey Calls Me From Rehab
By LUKE IS BACK | Comments (0)

12:10 p.m. Mary calls (audio). "You’re a f—ing asshole."

Luke: "What?"

Mary: "You act like you don’t know what I’m talking about. I have let you get away with a lot of s—, and I kept my mouth shut about a lot of s—, but I cannot f—ing believe you. You really stepped over the line this time. I mean, I thought you were my friend. I don’t know why I would think that. You’ve obviously proved otherwise. You are a f—ing prick. And you know what? Addiction is a disease, you asshole. If you’re so f—ing educated, why don’t you go look it up?"

She hangs up.

+++

Priceless. I think we can thank Stevie Why for this particular meltdown. Luke was merely the vessel.

I havent kept up with shit lately, but what did Luke do exactly? Claim Mary's love of Xanax to be simply her aquiescing to love of the pleasure the drug brings instead of her being in the grips of a deadly chemical disease? Did he say that she uses Xanax to quash the pangs of guilt that emanate from her conscience every time she fucks for money, instead of her being a helpless pawn of a pharmaceutical demon? And now beacuse she ate so MUCH Xanax her body needs it just to function, let alone behave in the decadent and slothy manner she is accustomed, and now prefers?


L*kE Help me, but i do get overly aroused and excited when I encounter chicks willing to do anything for, or under the influence of, PILLS. Stories and threads like this HELP ME identify the things I NEED to work on to become a better human being. it brings back all my past sins with a rush of shame and guilt and fear of punishment.

Lets look at this objectively: Here I am, a 39 year old, jaded crippled fucker with too much money and not enough moral fiber or self respect. While I lean towards handsome and charming, ultimately I am still a cripple, and under normal circumstances, MOST hot chicks will choose a NON-crippled dude to spend the night with....UNLESSSSSSSS, I happen to be holding a nice full bottle of Xanax, or VICODIN, or Percocet, or even Morphine. I once said, percocet is as good as CASH in Most Strip clubs....SO TRUE.

So I tell a hot, Pill-loving chick, like Mary Carey, as she begins to feel the first inklings of Withdrawal because she has run out and has not popped/dosed in hours, that i HAVE WHAT SHE NEEDS, in abundance. We retire to my chambers, I lay her down on the bed, tell her to open her mouth and stick her tongue out and say "ahhhh...." and I place, one after another, a single 1 mg Xanax tablet on her tongue and watch her swallow as I hold my hand on her throat to feel the swallow reflex in action as the pill(s) travel down her esophagus into her tummy. Six or seven pills later, I tell the hot chick "Let's cuddle until they kick in ok? You tell me when you feel better, and then you can pay me back...." She is grateful and feels happy, grateful and beholding to me, and she doesnt want to lose me as a connection because it is a fucking LOAD off her mind to have someone like me, a cute intelligent caring sensitive generous NON-scumbaggish . . . SCUMBAG !

Still, I am so much more preferable than some 50 plus year old doctor with bad breath and pubic hair that she has to blow in a tiny exam room, or some tatooed overgrown freak-of-a-dealer who will just as likely PUNCH her as kindly dump a load down her throat....25-30 minutes later, still on the bed in each other's arms caressing each other, as the peaceful euphoria washes over her and puts the zap on her brain, thats when it starts. "What do you want me to do baby?" she asks me, as I caress her cheeks and stare into her glazed over eyes and pinpoint pupils...."Just lie there, exactly as you are..." I reply.

I get up on my knees and pull my dick out and start jerking off right over her mouth...she smiles and giggles, both due to the pleasure the drugs are now bringing her, and because I look so fucking stupid, and cute, at the same time whacking off right in front of her face...she starts with the tongue, teasing me, egging me on....'Open up again babe...thats it, dont move..." <Spooge> <hold-on-tongue> <gobble-gulp> She smiles up at me and slurrs with half open eyes, "mmmm did u like doing that baby? Can i have another pill now??"

REHAB? FUCK THAT.....

Um.... that was me. He cut and pasted my rant at Luke from rehab, and attributed it to Mary. If you read further down the story he actually explains that.

It's actually funny that Luke put this up today, since today is my 6 month sobriety date.

Luke: “What about the higher power stuff?”
Mary: “The what?”

So did Mary actually call Luke or what?

Its funny as my girlfriend mentioned that Mary AND Chyna were in the same celebrehab as she read it on Perez Hilton; she had no clue I had written that whole diatribe the day before (and I told her my Chyna-rape story for the first time a few nights back). Looks like I created a little buzz for Lukie-poo though so there's some silver lining to this shit storm.

Now tonights Lord's prayer: (Repeat after me)
Dear god, if you're real, please send an asteroid down from the heavens upon that rehab facility (or soundstage they're being sequestered) pathetic enough to open up to reality TV cameras and save the world a couple hundred pounds of cytoplasm so its organic matter may return to the Earth and begin anew.

Two retarded, wingless birds with one stone and you might just take out some terrible reality TV jockeys while at it too. If you don't you suck for a god.

Xanax are good in moderation. Dont take them for more than like 5 days in a row or you will develop a habit that is one of the worst to kick. But they are good for relaxing and sleeping very well.

Renfield, I know we don't always see eye to eye, but I'm with you when it comes to animal abusers/dumpers.

I saw Mary at the Woodland Hills Sportsmart a few years ago. She was absolutely scary looking. When she smiled, her head looked like a carved pumpkin, especially with her orange-tinted face makeup.

mary carey needs a good fuck!

yep, I said it!

luke is so asking for everything he is getting these days. what a fucking muppet, judaism and porn. I mean, really..