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#260700 - 07/20/07 12:29 PM Hello there!
Qayin Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 07/13/07
Posts: 15
Loc: Heartbreak Hotel
Hello everybody! This is my first post on this board. I'd like to get a general idea about this place before I throw myself in at the deep end.

So, what do you love and hate about (being a member of) xxxporntalk.com?


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#260701 - 07/20/07 12:38 PM Re: Hello there!
Dick Head Offline
AC Cream Wannabe

Registered: 01/18/06
Posts: 505
i love this
_________________________

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#260702 - 07/20/07 12:46 PM Re: Hello there!
Soopergrizz Offline
Porn Fucking Master

Registered: 02/23/05
Posts: 3724
Loc: Paddling my canoe in the wild
and we hate each other, and ourselves. But not necessarily in that order.
_________________________
You're all still alive?

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#260703 - 07/20/07 01:05 PM Re: Hello there!
Qayin Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 07/13/07
Posts: 15
Loc: Heartbreak Hotel
Quote:

i love this




I see, you're into the flavour of the month... or just the graemlin?

I heard pistol-whipping is just the new donkey punch? Or will it become a standard in porn like the whole face slapping and throat grabbing nonsense everybody seems to be doing nowadays?

What else?


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#260704 - 07/20/07 01:07 PM Re: Hello there!
Qayin Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 07/13/07
Posts: 15
Loc: Heartbreak Hotel
Quote:

and we hate each other, and ourselves. But not necessarily in that order.




Sounds healthy to me...


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#260705 - 07/20/07 01:50 PM Re: Hello there!
Conky Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
Welcome to XPT. And welcome to the Cage.

Egypt, huh? Interesting....
_________________________
I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH

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#260706 - 07/20/07 02:02 PM Re: Hello there!
Sergio T. Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 07/20/03
Posts: 5256
Loc: CSW Wrestling - Gracie Academy
I smell a alt-id here. I could be wrong, but I doubt it. What I like is the Luke Ford reference question at the end of his first post.

Isn't the laws regarding porn in Egypt strict? What are the penalties if caught with it? Just curious.
_________________________

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#260707 - 07/20/07 02:05 PM Re: Hello there!
Conky Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
Quote:

What I like is the Luke Ford reference question at the end of his first post.




Maybe devout Muslims suffer from the same emotional and spiritual hand wringing as Jews?

Hey, we could be on to something. We could have our own Middle East peace accord, formed here in the Cage between Duke and our new Egyptian buddy!
_________________________
I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH

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#260708 - 07/28/07 09:03 AM Re: Hello there!
Qayin Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 07/13/07
Posts: 15
Loc: Heartbreak Hotel
Quote:

Maybe devout Muslims suffer from the same emotional and spiritual hand wringing as Jews?





How would I know? I don't pray to false gods and cheap imitations!

Praise the Aten, who is reborn to every new day and gives life and light to the world! Praise the Aten!

Praise the Aten, who speaks to his children through his humble son and servant Akhenaten, the effective spirit of Aten! Praise the Aten!

Praise the Aten!

Quote:


Hey, we could be on to something. We could have our own Middle East peace accord, formed here in the Cage between Duke and our new Egyptian buddy!





To bring peace to the world you have to be at peace with yourself! Luke Ford couldn't even bring peace to the sidewalk of La Cienega Boulevard...

But the question still stands: What do YOU love and hate about xxxporntalk?

Remember: Self-reflection is healthy and helps you to grow as a personality.

Come on you children of the sun, enlighten me!



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#260709 - 07/28/07 09:08 AM Re: Hello there!
mallocup Offline
Internet Tough Guy

Registered: 05/31/04
Posts: 764
you are all the same person right?

right?
_________________________
Cassie_Florida Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 09/29/05
Posts: 1
Loc: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Hi, I am new to xxxpt......

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#260710 - 07/28/07 09:19 AM Re: Hello there!
Conky Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
Quote:

But the question still stands: What do YOU love and hate about xxxporntalk?

Remember: Self-reflection is healthy and helps you to grow as a personality.

Come on you children of the sun, enlighten me!




I love XPT because of the rich diversity of Alt IDs you can find on the board.

I hate XPT because of all the shit Alt IDs you can find on the board.

I also love the fact that I can ban people....
_________________________
I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH

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#260711 - 07/28/07 10:03 AM Re: Hello there!
Qayin Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 07/13/07
Posts: 15
Loc: Heartbreak Hotel
Quote:


I love XPT because of the rich diversity of Alt IDs you can find on the board.

I hate XPT because of all the shit Alt IDs you can find on the board.

I also love the fact that I can ban people....




I understand an "Alt Id" is somebody who posts under two (or more) user names on this board? Does this happen frequently? Is it a serious problem for this board?

So, does your statement above mean without "Alt IDs" and moderator status you wouldn't even be here? You aren't interested in pictures of nude women engaging in acts of bebauchery, gossip and scorn for the intellectual, moral and law-related shortcomings of the people who work in the pornography business (these seem to be the main topics around here, as far as I could see up to now)? I'm flummoxed!


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#260712 - 07/28/07 01:11 PM Re: Hello there!
Qayin Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 07/13/07
Posts: 15
Loc: Heartbreak Hotel
Quote:


Isn't the laws regarding porn in Egypt strict? What are the penalties if caught with it? Just curious.




They are strict!

"Article 178 of the Penal Code n°58 of 1937

'A punishment of imprisonment for 2 years and a fine from 20 to 500 L.E. or one of these punishments shall be imposed on anyone who:

manufactured or possessed -

printed materials, manuscripts, advertisements, relieves, engraves, manual or photographic drawings, symbolic signs or any other material or photographs violating public morals;

- in case this manufacture or possession was intended to trafficking, adhesion or exhibition.

The same punishment shall be imposed on anyone who:

imported, exported or transferred by himself or by any other person any of the above-mentioned materials.
Issued an advertisement, publicly exhibited, sold, rented, offered for sale or for rent, even though this was unpublicly effected.
Publicly and by direct or indirect means forwarded, even though free of charge and by any means, any of the above-mentioned material.
Distributed or handed over with intent to be distributed, by any means, any of these materials.
Discretely distributed any of these materials, even though free of charge and with intent to corrupt morals.
As well as the fore-cited punishment is to be inflicted to anyone who:

publicly delivered immoral songs, shouting or speeches.
publicly seduced committing debauchery or issued advertisements or messages of any expressions.
In case of recidivism the punishment shall be imprisonment and a fine without violating article 50 of this Code.'"

Additionally, there are laws against "offences against public morals and sensitivities" and "violating the teachings of religion and propagating depraved ideas and moral depravity" that have been used against homosexual and bisexual people in the recent past. I don't think an Egyptian prosecutor would refrain from trying to put these to "good use" against producers and consumers of pornography, too. This would mean up to five years in jail for a person convicted of such a crime, as far as I know.



On the other hand, they aren't THAT strict... If it were up to the islamic fundamentalists that gain more and more control over the "opinion of the people", convicts would, at least, be emasculated with a dull knife followed by a public stoning.

Of course, all the above doesn't mean that pornography doesn't exist in Egypt. Just like drugs, services of prostitutes, alcoholic beverages, licenses for archeological excavations and pretty much every other product or service under the sun, it's just a question of "bakshish". And who you "know"...



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#260713 - 07/28/07 01:28 PM Re: Hello there!
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:

So, does your statement above mean without "Alt IDs" and moderator status you wouldn't even be here?




I think Conky's giving you a subtle hint to step up your game.

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#260714 - 07/29/07 02:13 PM Re: Hello there!
Qayin Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 07/13/07
Posts: 15
Loc: Heartbreak Hotel
Quote:


I think Conky's giving you a subtle hint to step up your game.




And what do you love and hate about xxxporntalk, Jim B.?


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#260715 - 07/29/07 02:31 PM Re: Hello there!
Anonymous
Unregistered


I love the fact that you can say or do just about anything except call yourself "anon." Strange little quirk of the management. Other than that, anything goes.

I hate it when people dress up like King Tut and rip off Luke Ford's Schtick. If you're going to play Rabbi Floored, do it right: Don't post on the Sabbath.

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#260716 - 07/31/07 12:50 AM Re: Hello there!
covertperv Offline
Rob Black's Crack Pipe

Registered: 01/23/07
Posts: 102
I love the fact that you gan get off to bitches being abused, (simulated) raped, and generally degraded and not be judged or looked down upon.


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#260717 - 07/31/07 04:58 PM Re: Hello there!
Qayin Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 07/13/07
Posts: 15
Loc: Heartbreak Hotel
Quote:


I hate it when people dress up like King Tut and rip off Luke Ford's Schtick. If you're going to play Rabbi Floored, do it right: Don't post on the Sabbath.




Total misunderstanding on your part, oh devoted servant of the law! I'm an avid admirer and student of the Luke Ford interview technique. The use of his standard introductory question in this thread is actually a hommage (French pronounciation please!) to the master of the innocent-causerie-turning-into-awkward-distress-within-the-twinkling-of-an-eye. May the Aten give that he will never develop any kind of professional journalistic approach!

As for dressing like my son Tutankhaten (those damned polytheist bonzes forced him to change his name to Tutankhamun...), who doesn't want to look like the hip young cats?

Praise the Aten, giver of light and bringer of life!

And now: Reflect children of the sun! What do you love and hate about xxxporntalk? Open up and let us learn!


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#260718 - 07/31/07 05:13 PM Re: Hello there!
Qayin Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 07/13/07
Posts: 15
Loc: Heartbreak Hotel
Quote:

I love the fact that you gan get off to bitches being abused, (simulated) raped, and generally degraded and not be judged or looked down upon.






You are a bad person and should be ashamed of yourself! May the Aten incinerate your worthless physical form! May your perverted spirit roam the desert forever and never reach the peaceful afterlife!

And tell me more...


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#260719 - 07/31/07 05:41 PM Re: Hello there!
Soopergrizz Offline
Porn Fucking Master

Registered: 02/23/05
Posts: 3724
Loc: Paddling my canoe in the wild
You'd better up your game son, because your shit is getting old fast.
_________________________
You're all still alive?

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#260720 - 07/31/07 07:33 PM Re: Hello there!
elaborator Offline
Porn Icon

Registered: 01/27/06
Posts: 3440
Loc: Jaundice Town

Quote:

You'd better up your game son, because your shit is getting old fast.





do you mean Jim B or King Tut?
_________________________





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#260721 - 07/31/07 07:35 PM Re: Hello there!
Sergio T. Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 07/20/03
Posts: 5256
Loc: CSW Wrestling - Gracie Academy
Quote:

You'd better up your game son, because your shit is getting old fast.



Just like in pro wrestling, your gimmick is stale. Go back to the drawing board and repackage yourself.
_________________________

Top
#260722 - 07/31/07 10:06 PM Re: Hello there!
Soopergrizz Offline
Porn Fucking Master

Registered: 02/23/05
Posts: 3724
Loc: Paddling my canoe in the wild
Quote:

Quote:

You'd better up your game son, because your shit is getting old fast.



Just like in pro wrestling, your gimmick is stale. Go back to the drawing board and repackage yourself.




Worked for this Egyptian

_________________________
You're all still alive?

Top
#260723 - 07/31/07 10:13 PM Re: Hello there!
elaborator Offline
Porn Icon

Registered: 01/27/06
Posts: 3440
Loc: Jaundice Town
and this one...



Sadat wasn't taking shit from anybody!
_________________________





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#260724 - 07/31/07 10:57 PM Re: Hello there!
*L*G* Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 06/05/05
Posts: 4468
Loc: Great America
Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

You'd better up your game son, because your shit is getting old fast.



Just like in pro wrestling, your gimmick is stale. Go back to the drawing board and repackage yourself.




Worked for this Egyptian







iron sheik is from iran

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#260725 - 08/01/07 07:56 AM Re: Hello there!
Conky Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
Quote:

and this one...



Sadat wasn't taking shit from anybody!




True. Sadat didn't take shit from anybody.

That's why his regime tortured Islamic activist Sayyid Qutb, which in effect twisted Qutb's view on moderate Islam to the point where he created a new doctrine which was then picked up by Ayman Zawarhiri, who was one of the founders of Islamic Jihad, which later assassinated Sadat.

Worked out well for him.
_________________________
I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH

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#260726 - 08/01/07 08:58 AM Re: Hello there!
Soopergrizz Offline
Porn Fucking Master

Registered: 02/23/05
Posts: 3724
Loc: Paddling my canoe in the wild
Quote:


True. Sadat didn't take shit from anybody.

That's why his regime tortured Islamic activist Sayyid Qutb, which in effect twisted Qutb's view on moderate Islam to the point where he created a new doctrine which was then picked up by Ayman Zawarhiri, who was one of the founders of Islamic Jihad, which later assassinated Sadat.

Worked out well for him.




If I read you correctly, if we play this right, we can get Auchentoshan assassinated?

_________________________
You're all still alive?

Top
#260727 - 08/01/07 12:29 PM Re: Hello there!
Qayin Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 07/13/07
Posts: 15
Loc: Heartbreak Hotel
The Hymn of the Aten

Adoration of Re-Horakhty-who-rejoices-in-the-lightland,
In-his-name-Shu-who-is-the-Aten, living forever;
the great living Aten, who is in jubilee,
Lord of all that the Disk surrounds,
Lord of the Sky, Lord of the Earth,
Lord of the House-of-the-Aten in Akhet-Aten.

Adoration of the King of Upper and Lower Egypt,
who lives by Maat, the Lord of the Two Lands,
Nefer-kheperu-Re, Sole-one-of-Re,
the Son of Re who lives by Maat, Lord of Crowns,
Akhenaten, great in his lifetime
and of the beloved great Queen,
Lady of the Two Lands : Nefer-nefru-Aten Nefertiti,
who lives in health and youth forever!

The Vizier,
the Fanbearer on the right of the King, he says:



Splendid You rise in the lightland of the sky,
O living Aten, creator of life!
You have dawned in the eastern lightland.
You fill every land with your beauty.

You are beauteous, mighty & radiant.
Risen high over every land,
your rays embrace the lands,to the limit of all that You made.
Being Re, You reach their end.
You bend them for your beloved son.
Though You are far, your rays are on Earth.
Though seen by them, your course is unknown.

When You set in the western lightland,
Earth is in darkness, as if death.
The sleepers are in their chambers, heads covered, no eye seeing the other.
One could steal their goods from under their heads,they would not notice it.
Every lion comes from its den.The serpents bite.
Darkness hovers, Earth is silent.
For its creator rests in the lightland.

At dawn You have risen in the lightland.
To shine as the Aten of daytime!
You dispel the dark and cast your rays.
The Two Lands celebrate daily.
Awake they stand on their feet. You have made them get up.
They wash and dress, their arms raised in adoration to your appearance.
The entire land sets out to work.
All cattle are satisfied with their fodder.The trees and the grass become green.
Birds fly from their nests, their wings praising your Ka.
All game animals frisk on their hooves, all that fly and flutter,
live when You dawn for them.
Ships fare downstream and back upstream, roads lie open when You rise.
The fish in the river dart before You.
Your rays penetrate the Great Green deep.

O You, who make semen grow in women,
who creates people from sperm,
who feeds the son in his mother's womb,
who soothes him to still his tears.
You nurse in the womb !
Giver of breath to nourish all creatures.
When the child emerges from the womb to breathe on the day of his birth,
You open wide his mouth to supply his needs.

The chick in the egg, chirping in the shell,
You give it breath within to sustain its life.
When it is complete, it breaks out from the egg.
It emerges from the egg, to say it is complete.
Walking on its legs when emerging.

How many are your deeds,
though hidden from sight.
O sole God without equal !
You made the Earth as You desired, You alone.
With people, cattle, and all creatures.
With everything upon Earth that walks on legs,
and all that is on high and flies with its wings.

The foreign lands of Syria and Nubia, and the land of Egypt,
You set everybody in his place and supply their needs.
They all have their food and their lifetimes are counted.
Tongues differ in speech, their characters as well.
Their skins are distinct, for You distinguished the peoples.

You made the Nile in the Netherworld.
You bring it up when You will, to keep those of Egypt alive,
for You have created them for yourself.

Lord of All who toils for them.
Lord of All Lands who shines for them.
O Aten of daytime, great in glory !

All distant lands, You make them live.
You made a heavenly Nile descend for them.
With waves beating on the mountains like the sea,
to drench their fields and their towns.

How excellent are your ways, O Lord of Eternity!
The Nile from heaven for foreign peoples
and all land-creatures that walk on legs.
For Egypt the Nile from the Netherworld.

Your rays nurse all fields.
When You shine they live, they grow for You.
You made the seasons, so that all that You made may come to life.
Winter cools them, and heat makes them sense You.

You created the sky far away in order to ascend to it, to witness everything You created.
You are alone, shining in your form of the living Aten.
Risen, radiant, distant and near.
You made millions of forms from yourself alone : cities, towns, fields, the river's course.
All eyes see You above them as the Aten of the daytime on high.
When You are gone, your eye is gone
which You have made for their sake

But even then You are in my heart
and there is no other who knows You,
only your son, Nefer-kheperu-Re, Sole-one-of-Re,
whom You have taught your ways and your might.

The ones on Earth come into being by your hand,in the way You made them.
When You rise, they live.
When You set, they die.
ou yourself are lifetime itself, one lives through You.
All eyes rest on beauty until You set.
All labor ceases when You rest in the West.

When You rise, You make all arms firm for the King,
every leg is on the move since You founded the Earth,
You rouse them for your son, who emerged from your body.
The King who lives by Maat, the Lord of the Two Lands :
Nefer-kheperu-Re, Sole-one-of-Re, the Son of Re who lives by Maat,
the Lord of Crowns, Akhenaten, great in his lifetime.
And the great Queen whom he loves, the Lady of the Two Lands:
Nefer-neferu-Aten Nefertiti, who lives and is rejuvenated forever and ever.


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#260728 - 08/01/07 12:30 PM Re: Hello there!
Vizzle Offline
Porn Fucking Master

Registered: 10/30/06
Posts: 3812
Loc: Neither here, nor there.
You've seen The Scorpion King FAR too many times.
_________________________
"You know this is XXXPornTalk.com right? You sound like an ADT person. I want to poop on you." -Malice

Top
#260729 - 08/01/07 12:48 PM Re: Hello there!
Qayin Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 07/13/07
Posts: 15
Loc: Heartbreak Hotel
A word or two to Luke Ford:

Can you tell a pig from a sheep?

I'm not a God, I'm a Pharao!

I brought the concept of a single deity to mankind. I destroyed the wrong idols. All for the praise of the Aten! One Aten - one world. One sun in the sky!

And you dare to pontificate about monotheism in schoolmasterly ways?

Preposterous git! Mindless copyist! Your mere existence insults the Aten!


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#260730 - 08/01/07 12:54 PM Re: Hello there!
Moxie Offline
Human Garbage

Registered: 06/23/06
Posts: 1557
Loc: New York
At least someone found a use for the tut graemlin.
_________________________
"This thing is ready to do damage!"

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#260731 - 08/01/07 01:14 PM Re: Hello there!
Sergio T. Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 07/20/03
Posts: 5256
Loc: CSW Wrestling - Gracie Academy

Slaves
Hebrews born to serve, to the pharaoh
Heed
To his every word, live in fear
Faith
Of the unknown one, the deliverer
Wait
Something must be done, four hundred years

So let it be written
So let it be done
I'm sent here by the chosen one
So let it be written
So let it be done
To kill the first born pharaoh's son
I'm creeping death

Now
Let my people go, land of Goshen
Go
I will be with thee, bush of fire
Blood
Running red and strong down the Nile
Plague
Darkness three days long, hail to fire

So let it be written
So let it be done
I'm sent here by the chosen one
So let it be written
So let it be done
To kill the first born pharaoh's son
I'm creeping death

Die by my hand
I creep across the land
Killing first-born man
Die by my hand
I creep across the land
Killing first-born man

I
Rule the midnight air, the destroyer
Born
I shall soon be there, deadly mass
I
Creep the steps and floor, final darkness
Blood
Lambs blood painted door, I shall pass

So let it be written
So let it be done
I'm sent here by the chosen one
So let it be written
So let it be done
To kill the first born pharaoh's son
I'm creeping death
_________________________

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#260732 - 08/01/07 02:13 PM Re: Hello there!
Conky Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
This thread hasn't just jumped the shark, it's speared it, cooked it, eaten it and shat it back out again.
_________________________
I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH

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#260733 - 08/01/07 02:30 PM Re: Hello there!
Bornyo Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
Quote:

This thread hasn't just jumped the shark, it's speared it, cooked it, eaten it and shat it back out again.




It is shark week, after all.

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#260734 - 08/01/07 02:39 PM Re: Hello there!
Conky Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
I wish it was lion week. Or mafia week.
_________________________
I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH

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#260735 - 08/01/07 02:54 PM Re: Hello there!
loopnode Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/12/05
Posts: 7322
Loc: The Children's Limbo
Akhenaten must be doing some serious sage.
_________________________
I hit her with the hammer on top of the head. She made a lot of noise and kept on making noise, so I hit her again.

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#260736 - 08/01/07 03:12 PM Re: Hello there!
John Floofin Offline
Porn Icon

Registered: 02/04/05
Posts: 3499
Loc: The Dirty: 480


All of you.

Quote:

Auchentoshan




That's a terrible Scotch, tastes like rainwater runoff filtered through a campfire.

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#260737 - 08/01/07 03:17 PM Re: Hello there!
weeeee Offline
Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer

Registered: 01/09/06
Posts: 1248
akhenaten = luca_eisenstein

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#260738 - 08/01/07 04:05 PM Re: Hello there!
Sergio T. Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 07/20/03
Posts: 5256
Loc: CSW Wrestling - Gracie Academy
Quote:

Quote:

This thread hasn't just jumped the shark, it's speared it, cooked it, eaten it and shat it back out again.




It is shark week, after all.



Im pretty much glued to the Discovery channel this week.
_________________________

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#260739 - 08/01/07 04:18 PM Re: Hello there!
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:

akhenaten = luca_eisenstein




Pay attention, Tierney. Luca is ultra-orthodox. More so than Luke. Ergo, he can't be King Tut because Tut posted on the sabbath.

Besides, Luca's last alt was useful in that it fucked with the losers on ADT. This one has no redeeming features at all.

Top
#260740 - 08/01/07 06:54 PM Re: Hello there!
Vizzle Offline
Porn Fucking Master

Registered: 10/30/06
Posts: 3812
Loc: Neither here, nor there.
Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

This thread hasn't just jumped the shark, it's speared it, cooked it, eaten it and shat it back out again.




It is shark week, after all.



Im pretty much glued to the Discovery channel this week.




Yeah, no kidding bro. How about the Dirty Jobs shark episodes? Good stuff, I love that show.
_________________________
"You know this is XXXPornTalk.com right? You sound like an ADT person. I want to poop on you." -Malice

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#260741 - 08/01/07 10:23 PM Re: Hello there!
Luca Eisenstein Offline
Max Hardcore Prison Bitch

Registered: 05/15/07
Posts: 179
Quote:


Pay attention, Tierney. Luca is ultra-orthodox. More so than Luke. Ergo, he can't be King Tut because Tut posted on the sabbath.

Besides, Luca's last alt was useful in that it fucked with the losers on ADT. This one has no redeeming features at all.




I don't want to drive this trainwreck further into the ground, but who cares anyway at this point?

I'm actually not ultra-orthodox! I know you are aware of that, but there's too many strange people around here, and some of them are in the "box of rocks" category...

I'm a member of a liberal, progressive, "reform oriented" (whatever that is...) community. This leaves a lot of room for personal decisions. Even up to the point of deciding whether you want to observe certain mitzvot (commandments) and talmudic laws - or not. This means: Lots of conflicts with others and yourself! You really have to make up your mind about a lot of things and take a stand instead of just parroting somebody else's agenda.

Yes, I do observe the shabbat and its rituals (shomer shabbat) and the prayer "rules" (kippah, prayer shawl, tefillin, three times a day etc.). So, no XPT fun on Saturdays!

I'm trying to live shomer kashrut (eat kosher, keep everything that comes in contact with my food "clean") but I fail again and again and again...

I get perpetual critcism from my conservative brothers for my "progressive" views on some issues (homosexuality, premarital sex, contraception etc.) and my lifestyle / love life, while my liberal friends nag me about my "hardcore" views on other issues (converts / wannabes, certain mitzvot, the Third Temple, female rabbis, women who wear kippahs, "Are we really G-Ds chosen people?" - Yes we are! etc.) and the fact that I'm constantly belabouring their "anything goes and everybody's welcome" attitude.

As an ultra-orthodox Jew I'd be up to my ears "buried in the sand" by now, because I'm going to marry a "goya" (gentile woman) who will never ever do a giyur, have - "apparently" - already fathered a child with her (as we found out two days ago ) and have engaged in various kinds of very despicable shenanigans!

In other words: I'm always on the fence... But I like it, the view is quite good from here! And if anybody doesn't like it, fuck 'em! My life's too much of a roller coaster at the moment to give a rat's ass about anybody or anything else than my loved ones, my mom and my "hot mommy"! And Hashem, of course...

Sorry for a DaBurglar style post without Holly Randall, prostitutes, strippers, drugs, alcoholic beverages, hooker-shit-stained wheelchairs, hearing aids and money, money, money, but this thread is so fucking silly that it doesn't matter anyway... I can't contribute anything concerning Akhebooboo either, my people left Egypt a few thousand years ago, hence all my info is hopelessly outdated...

Finally, what I love and hate is my business - and my business is none of your business!

Back to the sharks and lions in old Egypt! Cairo, can you her me? Cairo...?

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#260742 - 08/01/07 11:31 PM Re: Hello there!
Oliver Cramwell Offline
Rob Black's Crack Pipe

Registered: 07/17/06
Posts: 57
How about you shut the fuck up, Fatboy.

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#260743 - 08/01/07 11:39 PM Re: Hello there!
elaborator Offline
Porn Icon

Registered: 01/27/06
Posts: 3440
Loc: Jaundice Town
Quote:

Im pretty much glued to the Discovery channel this week.






What i want to see is take the different ships and crews from "Deadliest Catch" and bring em all down to Capetown and have them catch those flying Great Whites and see which boat gets the most shark in a fixed period of time.


_________________________





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#260744 - 08/01/07 11:58 PM Re: Hello there!
Sergio T. Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 07/20/03
Posts: 5256
Loc: CSW Wrestling - Gracie Academy
Quote:

Quote:

Im pretty much glued to the Discovery channel this week.






What i want to see is take the different ships and crews from "Deadliest Catch" and bring em all down to Capetown and have them catch those flying Great Whites and see which boat gets the most shark in a fixed period of time.






Thats an idea. How about combining some of their top shows into one show? Have the guys from Myth Busters on Deadliest Catch trying to win cash with the guy from Cash Cab.
_________________________

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#260745 - 08/02/07 12:02 AM Re: Hello there!
elaborator Offline
Porn Icon

Registered: 01/27/06
Posts: 3440
Loc: Jaundice Town
dude...relax.
_________________________





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#260746 - 08/02/07 12:13 AM Re: Hello there!
k1ng Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 03/22/06
Posts: 6557
Loc: 2004 - the glory days
I always thought a Mythbusters and Jackass mix would be good entertainment. Mythbusters build crazy shit to test whatever obscure myth they can find and the brainless Jackass guys act as human guinea pigs to test the myths. That's win/win.
_________________________
"You are the worst poster in xpt yet I can't stop talking about you" - smelly monkey

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#260747 - 08/02/07 01:59 AM Re: Hello there!
the unknown pervert Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 03/22/07
Posts: 5186
Loc: Joshua Tree National Park
Quote:


Sorry for a DaBurglar style post without Holly Randall, prostitutes, strippers, drugs, alcoholic beverages, hooker-shit-stained wheelchairs, hearing aids and money, money, money,




Without any of these things it is not possible to post in Burglar style.
_________________________
I would eat Allie Sin's asshole until I got an emotion out of her.-Jerkules

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#260748 - 08/02/07 02:31 AM Re: Hello there!
The Ghost Is Toast Offline
Whoremaster

Registered: 10/21/05
Posts: 2710
Quote:


Slaves
Hebrews born to serve, to the pharaoh
Heed
To his every word, live in fear
Faith
Of the unknown one, the deliverer
Wait
Something must be done, four hundred years

So let it be written
So let it be done
I'm sent here by the chosen one
So let it be written
So let it be done
To kill the first born pharaoh's son
I'm creeping death

Now
Let my people go, land of Goshen
Go
I will be with thee, bush of fire
Blood
Running red and strong down the Nile
Plague
Darkness three days long, hail to fire

So let it be written
So let it be done
I'm sent here by the chosen one
So let it be written
So let it be done
To kill the first born pharaoh's son
I'm creeping death

Die by my hand
I creep across the land
Killing first-born man
Die by my hand
I creep across the land
Killing first-born man

I
Rule the midnight air, the destroyer
Born
I shall soon be there, deadly mass
I
Creep the steps and floor, final darkness
Blood
Lambs blood painted door, I shall pass

So let it be written
So let it be done
I'm sent here by the chosen one
So let it be written
So let it be done
To kill the first born pharaoh's son
I'm creeping death




...'Ride The Lightning' is my fave Metallica album ever!!!

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#260749 - 08/02/07 09:41 AM Re: Hello there!
Luca Eisenstein Offline
Max Hardcore Prison Bitch

Registered: 05/15/07
Posts: 179
Quote:

How about you shut the fuck up, Fatboy.




How about posting something else than witless one-liners and derogatory comments off-hand for once? You've got nothing constructive to say, you're not even remotely funny and you're obviously not very much into using your brain in general!

I may be annoying (that's good in my book!)... I may be a weak poster (do I care?) in some people's "estimation"... But I could never ever reach your level of utter uselessness, even if I devoted the rest of my life to nothing else...

Even Akhenwhatthefuck, cali33, LouCypher, Moblem and warp_speed are better posters than you! Do you realise that? You're worse than a schizophrenic egyptology nerd (or whatever he /she / it may be...), a spambot, a pathetic troll with the mind of a 10-year-old who jerks off to pictures of "Audis", a necrophiliac pervert from Poland and a guy who's so stupid he could starve to death in front of an open fridge!

Even that mould-infested, meth-addicted piss bucket Ryan Knox and Donny "super pimp genius" Dumb provide more entertainment than you!

If I were you, I'd ask myself one question (and one question only!), Ollie: Rope, razor or revolver?

I have nothing else to say to you, you may now go back to fingering your anus!

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