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#260603 - 07/20/07 11:28 AM What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
PorntoBorn Offline
Rob Black's Crack Pipe

Registered: 01/12/07
Posts: 55
Loc: Corner of Canoga and Saticoy

My ambition here is to start a thread that will be around as long as XPT and/or Ford is, even if that eventually means, down the line several years, one reply every six months as we, say, take note with a mixture of amusement and horror of his latest screw-up (Platinum X/Candy Shop going under, etc.), his latest topless, man-boobed self-portrait, his latest reactionary societal rant, his latest cry for love from Holly. A Duke Floored depreciation thread by another name, if you will. Too ambitious? We shall see. The guy IS a veritable bottomless well of material, after all.

So, what DOES make the Edsel such a self-important, loathsome, stuffy, misguided, mixed-up, screwed-up L7? Let us count the ways. I’ll get the ball rolling with two of the more obviously easy reasons:

1 - He doesn't like PORN fer Crissakes, proudly claiming not to jerk off to the stuff. Holy crap! Can you believe it!?! What is his problem!?!
2 - He openly admits to liking Air Supply. Holy crap! Can you.... well, you get the idea...


OK, next?!?
_________________________
"I can relate to Larry Craig. Like the good senator from Idaho, I am not gay, but I do like, on occasion, to prowl airport men's rooms for a little hot man-on-man action. Again, that doesn't make me gay." -Jamesn

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#260604 - 07/20/07 01:42 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Conky Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
3. Any time he starts a thread with the line "I feel we have failed insert porn name here"
4. I bet he still has that leather jacket too.
5. On the plus side, he's Burg's love rival.
_________________________
I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH

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#260605 - 07/20/07 02:49 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
DukeFloored Offline
Max Hardcore Prison Bitch

Registered: 01/19/04
Posts: 249
Ladies and gents, I feel like we have failed Holly. Were we there for her when she was hurting inside or did we just use her to basely satisfy our own sinful desires?

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#260606 - 07/20/07 02:52 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Conky Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
I ask you, how can anyone really hate Luke? Once you understand his humor, *he's a hard man to hate.





*Caveat: doesn't mean you shouldn't try.
_________________________
I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH

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#260607 - 07/20/07 03:05 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Stevie Why Offline
Gay For Pay

Registered: 05/16/07
Posts: 988
Loc: Sun Diego
Quote:

My ambition...




That phrase should never, ever, EVER be applied to any venture on XPT, let alone taking pride in bitching about Lurk.

_________________________
"I choppy choppy yo pee pee"

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#260608 - 07/20/07 03:10 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Holly Randall Offline
Chronic Masturbator

Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
Quote:

Ladies and gents, I feel like we have failed Holly. Were we there for her when she was hurting inside or did we just use her to basely satisfy our own sinful desires?




I know you're kidding here Luke, but if anything, YOU used me when I was "hurting inside". When I was in rehab you posted that private matter on your site, and used it as a springboard to rail against those with addiction problems, which you claimed that you've experienced yourself. I find that people's practiced intolerance towards others and their beliefs reflects a personal inablity to forgive, and ultimately love, oneself. You claimed that I "lack self-control", you bemoaned my "moral failings", and you said the support I recieved for my decision "nauseated" you. A lot of people were there for me... unfortunately, you were not. It's in the past and I'm over it-- and though I don't hold a grudge against you for it, re-reading it just now again reminded me how conflicted you are inside. I hope that changes for you someday. Honestly.
_________________________
I really try to retain a respectful distance from my models, even when I'm lubing up their pussies.

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#260609 - 07/20/07 03:12 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Conky Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
I'm sorry, Holly. I can't help myself.

Quote:

YOU used me when I was "hurting inside"




_________________________
I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH

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#260610 - 07/20/07 03:12 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:

take note with a mixture of amusement and horror of his latest screw-up (Platinum X/Candy Shop going under, etc.)




I hate to break it to you, Ace, but the jury's still out on this one. Plus, as far as I can tell, Luke got his info Here, from Deep Throat, like the rest of us.

There's volumes of things you can rank on Luke for; that doesn't necessarily make him a dipshit. A dweeb, maybe, but not a dipshit.

Try Again.

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#260611 - 07/20/07 03:34 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Holly Randall Offline
Chronic Masturbator

Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
Quote:

I'm sorry, Holly. I can't help myself.

Quote:

YOU used me when I was "hurting inside"









LOL... I forgive you.
_________________________
I really try to retain a respectful distance from my models, even when I'm lubing up their pussies.

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#260612 - 07/20/07 04:14 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Desmond Ford Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 05/05/07
Posts: 4
G'day, mates. My name is Desmond Ford, and I'm here to say I'm right cheesed off with my gay son Luke Ford. The boy is a complete disgrace to the Ford family name, and I'll be checking in here regularly to tell you why. For now, let's just say I think the boy's unnatural relations with his childhood friend WAYNE CHERRY had a fair-dinkum lot to do with the sorry way he turned out. I'd have rather seen the abos kill him when he was young than suffer the embarrassment of his vendetta against the porn industry.

If my gay son Luke is reading this, I hope he heeds my advice: If y'don't like porn, son, leave it alone. Your attention-grubbing ways are all too familiar to me from the days when you'd cry for me and your mum in the middle of the night. It didn't work then, and it won't wash now.

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#260613 - 07/20/07 04:48 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
hyperion Offline
Rob Black's Crack Pipe

Registered: 07/02/07
Posts: 99
Loc: Hanging a clock in my Bathroom
Quote:

I'd have rather seen the abos kill him when he was young than suffer the embarrassment of his vendetta against the porn industry.




I thought dingos did that kind of thing

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#260614 - 07/20/07 04:56 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:

I think the boy's unnatural relations with his childhood friend WAYNE CHERRY had a fair-dinkum lot to do with the sorry way he turned out.





Um, Reverend Des? Hi. I thought Luke's unnatural relations with the wallabies had more to do with it than the Cherry Boy. Comment?

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#260615 - 07/20/07 05:25 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Desmond Ford Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 05/05/07
Posts: 4
G'day Jim B. I'm just having a spot of Vegemite and leafing through my Bible verses on XPT right about now.

Regarding my hypocritical, homosexual, attention-seeking, talentless son Luke Ford and his frolics with the wallabies: let's not forget that Luke also had unnatural carnal knowledge of cone snails, cane toads, stonefish, wallaroos, box jellies, Tasmanian devils, the deadly Taipan snake and of course, the fair-dinkum large saltie named Captain Jack who lived behind our humble home. No wonder he's such a douche-guzzling, simpering creep as an "adult".


My faggot son Luke -- and I apologize for that slip of the tongue as a man of the cloth, but really -- my son Luke Ford is like our Australian kookaburra... a bird known for its shrill, annoying cry. Let's examine a few points:

1. HYPOCRITE

He makes a living off porn, accepts porn ad dollars, feeds off and obsesses on the industry, and MADE A PORN MOVIE -- then condemns it all with phony morality. He's the least moral person I've ever met...and I raised the little whelp, so I ought to know!

I believe that as a child, Luke justified this two-faced tendency by referring to his "hee-hee" personality. And let me tell you, when the boy began indulging his "hee-hee" personality the first thing I did was to crack him a good one. Maybe someone should do the same now.

2. GAY

He dreams of eating snake sandwiches and performing double-penetrations with a male friend (do you lot dream about that? I DON'T!), wears tighty-whiteys, is scared of the vagina (the poof says they smell funny) and primps himself like a fair-dinkum sissy with Grecian formula. 'Nuff said.

3. DOES NOT RESPECT HIS DAD, DESMOND FORD

He converted to Judaism just to honk me off, but still yearns to please me by obsessing on his own not-so-secret hate for the religion of the Hebrews, which he mocks with his very existence.

In short, lads, I'm just about fit to bust over this matter. I'll have to watch a few of your American Bukakke videos just to let out some steam! In the meantime, let me bugger off right now with this: My gay son Luke Ford is an utterly worthless piece of shit, a hack writer, a plagiarist and a loser of the lowest order. I'll be back soon with more concrete proof -- as if any were needed!

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#260616 - 07/20/07 05:40 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
DukeFloored Offline
Max Hardcore Prison Bitch

Registered: 01/19/04
Posts: 249
Dad, I'm so sorry. I'll try to do better. I really truly want to be a man. I do. I do.
I wish I were a lumberjack...

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#260617 - 07/20/07 05:47 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
hyperion Offline
Rob Black's Crack Pipe

Registered: 07/02/07
Posts: 99
Loc: Hanging a clock in my Bathroom
I've never met the man , but I think I can say with a reasonable amount of accuracy that Luke for what its worth doesn't look at himself as a dipshit.I've followed his website over the years, even before he sold it and its almost as though he has this fascination with Porn and the people in it.

He's described himself as as not a conventional journalist, not a businessman, but more of an entertainer.I'm curious though as though he has an ongoing discussion on his other blog about the ongoing failures of journalism. currently he seems to be railing at some situation where an Anchorwoman was having a relationship with the Mayor of Los Angeles and why the mainstream media isn't camping outside her door looking for whatever it is that reporters look for.

Maybe I'm starry-eyed but shouldn't he be practicing professionally what he wishes other would?. He's a constant negative influence on the Adult Business, for the simple reason that when Luke speaks to someone of shall we say - more conservative viewpoints he finds a receptive audience.
To my own clearly limited eyes it was my impression that reporters and news instruments where to show non-bias in their reporting, gather the facts relevant to a situation and let the viewer decide.


But how does this jibe with his self description of an 'entertainer'. Call me provincial but since when do entertainers other than Tom Cruise et al complain about the media? and especially when most of the complaints about the Adult business consist a long series of blanket statements to the effect that Porn is probably worse for you than sucking on an exhaust pipe?

Just wonderin'


Edited by hyperion (07/20/07 05:48 PM)

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#260618 - 07/20/07 05:49 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Anonymous
Unregistered


I'm sorry Reverend, did you just say that LUKE MADE A PORNO??? That's news to me. It must be worth a fortune just for the Historical Curiosity value, even though it probably suck Kangaroo Balls. Please, tell us more.

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#260619 - 07/20/07 05:50 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
hyperion Offline
Rob Black's Crack Pipe

Registered: 07/02/07
Posts: 99
Loc: Hanging a clock in my Bathroom
Quote:

Dad, I'm so sorry. I'll try to do better. I really truly want to be a man. I do. I do.
I wish I were a lumberjack...




Does that mean you'd like to womens clothing and hang around in bars?


Edited by hyperion (07/20/07 05:51 PM)

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#260620 - 07/20/07 05:52 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
k1ng Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 03/22/06
Posts: 6557
Loc: 2004 - the glory days
mr. desmond ford, thanks for providing your invaluable perspective on our moral leader



whoever it is, great alt id
_________________________
"You are the worst poster in xpt yet I can't stop talking about you" - smelly monkey

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#260621 - 07/20/07 06:17 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
DukeFloored Offline
Max Hardcore Prison Bitch

Registered: 01/19/04
Posts: 249
Quote:

Does that mean you'd like to womens clothing and hang around in bars?




I have my foibles but never on Friday nights.

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#260622 - 07/20/07 06:58 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
hyperion Offline
Rob Black's Crack Pipe

Registered: 07/02/07
Posts: 99
Loc: Hanging a clock in my Bathroom
Quote:

Quote:

Does that mean you'd like to womens clothing and hang around in bars?




I have my foibles but never on Friday nights.




Not that there is anything wrong with wearing womens clothing.

But pressing wild flowers is right out. If you do that you're condemned to the outer darkness forever im afraid


Edited by hyperion (07/20/07 07:01 PM)

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#260623 - 07/20/07 07:50 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
zenman Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/26/03
Posts: 8160
Loc: Roma, Repubblica Italiana
Quote:

I'm sorry, Holly. I can't help myself.

Quote:

YOU used me when I was "hurting inside"









+1
_________________________
"All my years in p*rn didn't quite prepare me for childbirth. I mistakenly thought all the stretching I did would make this easier."

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#260624 - 07/20/07 07:52 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
PorntoBorn Offline
Rob Black's Crack Pipe

Registered: 01/12/07
Posts: 55
Loc: Corner of Canoga and Saticoy
Yet another reason why Ford is a complete dipshit: His latest overblown, way-over-the-top rant on the alleged evils of porn ("Does Porn Degrade?). Reading his anti-porn rants over the years, one would think that porn - hell, sex period - is society's gravest ill, more so than violent crime, racism, alcohol/drug addiction, the terrorist threat, global warming, et al. Ford clearly has a - sorry for the bad pun - major hard-on for the adult industry that is clearly way out of proportion to any of its alleged evils. Nowhere is his lunatic-fringe conservative nature more evident than when he rants about XXX. The question is what is the source of his very odd hatred of the adult industry? His strict religious upbringing perhaps? One that formulated his extremely rigid view of human sexuality? Or, as Holly notes, his self-loathing? Why is porn, of all things, in Luke's cross hairs, as opposed to any of the far more serious societal ills I tick off above? Why can't he just relax and derive pleasure from it? Many mental health professionals would absolutely disagree with his assertion that anyone who uses porn is a "loser." Millions of emotionally healthy people use porn all the time. Ford is clearly the emotionally unhealthy one, not them. It irks him to no end when people say, "relax, it's only sex," but it's true. What a nut case.
_________________________
"I can relate to Larry Craig. Like the good senator from Idaho, I am not gay, but I do like, on occasion, to prowl airport men's rooms for a little hot man-on-man action. Again, that doesn't make me gay." -Jamesn

Top
#260625 - 07/20/07 07:58 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Desmond Ford Offline
ADT regular

Registered: 05/05/07
Posts: 4
It seems my whiny sodomite of a son is none too pleased with his own Dad speaking the truth. After years of "outing" what he calls "porners" to the world (more often than not with total inaccuracy) the boy has sent me an e-mail begging me not to use my own name REV. DESMOND FORD or that of his childhood sweetheart WAYNE CHERRY on a degenerate website called XXXPornTalk.

I'll not have this guff from you, boy. Do I have to fly from the outback to the Pico-Robertson area to beat some sense into your chemically-imbalanced noggin? I'll never understand what that feisty young sheila Holly Randall saw in your self-obsessed, terminally insecure, lying arse, but I'm glad to see the girl has smartened up. I can't say the same for you, Luke.

D'ya have a new SCOOP for us all, boy? Shouldn't you be out and about digging up dirt on the "porners" to make yourself feel superior? You're a failure, son. A failure of the most pathetic and embarrassing sort.

You want to show the world how fair-dinkum smart you are, mate? You crave recognition for your worthless efforts? Your self-published vanity press "books," your stinking, cut-and-pasted BLOGS, your fake Judaism? By the time I'm through with you, you'll be begging to crawl back into your dead mum's vagina...which resembles a box jellyfish.

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#260626 - 07/20/07 08:22 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Jigaloo Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/17/06
Posts: 7863
Quote:

It seems my whiny sodomite of a son is none too pleased with his own Dad speaking the truth. After years of "outing" what he calls "porners" to the world (more often than not with total inaccuracy) the boy has sent me an e-mail begging me not to use my own name REV. DESMOND FORD or that of his childhood sweetheart WAYNE CHERRY on a degenerate website called XXXPornTalk.

I'll not have this guff from you, boy. Do I have to fly from the outback to the Pico-Robertson area to beat some sense into your chemically-imbalanced noggin? I'll never understand what that feisty young sheila Holly Randall saw in your self-obsessed, terminally insecure, lying arse, but I'm glad to see the girl has smartened up. I can't say the same for you, Luke.

D'ya have a new SCOOP for us all, boy? Shouldn't you be out and about digging up dirt on the "porners" to make yourself feel superior? You're a failure, son. A failure of the most pathetic and embarrassing sort.

You want to show the world how fair-dinkum smart you are, mate? You crave recognition for your worthless efforts? Your self-published vanity press "books," your stinking, cut-and-pasted BLOGS, your fake Judaism? By the time I'm through with you, you'll be begging to crawl back into your dead mum's vagina...which resembles a box jellyfish.




It's the shabbos. Leave him be for tonight Mr. Jesus Loving Kiddie Diddler.
_________________________

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#260627 - 07/20/07 08:28 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Jigaloo Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/17/06
Posts: 7863
Quote:

Quote:

Ladies and gents, I feel like we have failed Holly. Were we there for her when she was hurting inside or did we just use her to basely satisfy our own sinful desires?




I know you're kidding here Luke, but if anything, YOU used me when I was "hurting inside". When I was in rehab you posted that private matter on your site, and used it as a springboard to rail against those with addiction problems, which you claimed that you've experienced yourself. I find that people's practiced intolerance towards others and their beliefs reflects a personal inablity to forgive, and ultimately love, oneself. You claimed that I "lack self-control", you bemoaned my "moral failings", and you said the support I recieved for my decision "nauseated" you. A lot of people were there for me... unfortunately, you were not. It's in the past and I'm over it-- and though I don't hold a grudge against you for it, re-reading it just now again reminded me how conflicted you are inside. I hope that changes for you someday. Honestly.




Holly, if it will make you feel better next time you are hurting please use me in any way you see fit.
_________________________

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#260628 - 07/20/07 08:36 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:

Yet another reason why Ford is a complete dipshit...




Hold it right there. You know P2B, I'm really enjoying Reverend Des' stuff a lot more than yours. For one thing, he's a lot easier to read; he understands the function of paragraphs and punctuation. And, well, he's a hell of a lot funnier than you. Why don't you sit down and let the old man show you how it's done.

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#260629 - 07/20/07 08:37 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:


It's the shabbos. Leave him be for tonight Mr. Jesus Loving Kiddie Diddler.




He's in Australia. It's the day after tomorrow over there.

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#260630 - 07/20/07 09:21 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
*L*G* Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 06/05/05
Posts: 4468
Loc: Great America
Luke "if your house is made of glass, don't throw stones at your neighbors." someday you going to be in the floor and everybody gone to kick you.

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#260631 - 07/20/07 11:21 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Da Burglar Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
Quote:

Quote:

Ladies and gents, I feel like we have failed Holly. Were we there for her when she was hurting inside or did we just use her to basely satisfy our own sinful desires?




I know you're kidding here Luke, but if anything, YOU used me when I was "hurting inside". When I was in rehab you posted that private matter on your site, and used it as a springboard to rail against those with addiction problems, which you claimed that you've experienced yourself. I find that people's practiced intolerance towards others and their beliefs reflects a personal inablity to forgive, and ultimately love, oneself. You claimed that I "lack self-control", you bemoaned my "moral failings", and you said the support I recieved for my decision "nauseated" you. A lot of people were there for me... unfortunately, you were not. It's in the past and I'm over it-- and though I don't hold a grudge against you for it, re-reading it just now again reminded me how conflicted you are inside. I hope that changes for you someday. Honestly.




Reading Holly's statements here brought back to my mind the conversation we had last week when I finally had a chance to meet her. Holly did not engage in any vitriolic rant against Luke when we talked...she did not sit there and go over ALL his faults and shortcomings and "OFIs" (Opportunities For Improvement), but rather she talked about how sad she was for him in his seeming unhappiness, how much she wished she could help him and how concerned she was for him. This struck me as remarkable that she would say these kind and loving things about Luke to me one on one, instead of letting me in on ALL the dirt on Luke, given my own exposure and interaction with Luke over the last several years (afterall, the man was a mentor/moral leader/colleague to me and at one point handed over control of his website to me for four days without even knowing me really!)... and this lack of anger and spite on Holly's part clues anyone in as to what Holly really is like inside.

Now I (and others ... I am not alone in this) may spend a lot of time here at XPT with puerile observations and lustful fingerpointing about Holly's beautiful external self and her fine qualities in the physical realm, but only because this is in fact a PORN board and to sit here and write effusive comments about Holly's compassionate and loving "inner self" instead of her ass, while the website is surrounded by pictures of women doused in and consuming semen, is somehow disingenuous. But Holly KNOWS (because of another one of her strengths, a healthy sense of humor and self deprecation) that I am being intentionally silly and overboard, and she take sit in stride (and secretly may even LOVE it!
)



Quote:

3. Any time he starts a thread with the line "I feel we have failed insert porn name here"
4. I bet he still has that leather jacket too.
5. On the plus side, he's Burg's love rival.




HA! Love Rival? Dude, Holly made it perfectly clear to me that, while I do have a few good qualities, I could NEVER even Hope to compete with Luke when it comes to this area. And I accept this because, in tune with her compassionate and HONEST nature, she didnt want to give me, da burglar, any false hope that might lead to heartache and pain down the road when she takes another man (probably not Luke but who knows..?) to the XPT prom instead of ME! SHe made it very clear that I am a good dear friend, but that she doesnt do anything with four wheels. Luke is simply more intelligent, better looking and more "manly" than I could ever hope of being...I am no more his rival than a rowboat Rivals the USS Nimitz!
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?

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#260632 - 07/21/07 02:43 AM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
BIFF™ Offline
Sex Slave Trader

Registered: 11/14/04
Posts: 1460
Loc: Down there
PorntoBorn = John T Bone = pedo douchebag
_________________________
I like me some Gia'd Jerkins.

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#260633 - 07/21/07 07:54 AM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
The Ghost Is Toast Offline
Whoremaster

Registered: 10/21/05
Posts: 2710
Quote:


Quote:

3. Any time he starts a thread with the line "I feel we have failed insert porn name here"
4. I bet he still has that leather jacket too.
5. On the plus side, he's Burg's love rival.




HA! Love Rival? Dude, Holly made it perfectly clear to me that, while I do have a few good qualities, I could NEVER even Hope to compete with Luke when it comes to this area. And I accept this because, in tune with her compassionate and HONEST nature, she didnt want to give me, da burglar, any false hope that might lead to heartache and pain down the road when she takes another man (probably not Luke but who knows..?) to the XPT prom instead of ME! SHe made it very clear that I am a good dear friend, but that she doesnt do anything with four wheels.





[tritone]Holly Randall has refused to do guys in wheelchairs during her whole performing career so I urge guys in wheelchairs to not attend her shows or buy her videos.[/tritone]


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#260634 - 07/21/07 08:20 AM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Jigaloo Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/17/06
Posts: 7863
Quote:

PorntoBorn = John T Bone = pedo douchebag




Absolutely.
_________________________

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#260635 - 07/21/07 02:52 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Da Burglar Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
Quote:

Quote:


Quote:

3. Any time he starts a thread with the line "I feel we have failed insert porn name here"
4. I bet he still has that leather jacket too.
5. On the plus side, he's Burg's love rival.




HA! Love Rival? Dude, Holly made it perfectly clear to me that, while I do have a few good qualities, I could NEVER even Hope to compete with Luke when it comes to this area. And I accept this because, in tune with her compassionate and HONEST nature, she didnt want to give me, da burglar, any false hope that might lead to heartache and pain down the road when she takes another man (probably not Luke but who knows..?) to the XPT prom instead of ME! SHe made it very clear that I am a good dear friend, but that she doesnt do anything with four wheels.





[tritone]Holly Randall has refused to do guys in wheelchairs during her whole performing career so I urge guys in wheelchairs to not attend her shows or buy her videos.[/tritone]





I do not quite understand the "tritone" part of the above...but Everyone knows I am just being satirical right? I was just building off of Conky's statement of me as Luke's love rival... lol ... trying to diffuse some of the pressure that seems to be headed towards Luke by adding some levity to the situation. I had not realized or bothered to read the debate going on over in the Crissy Moran Thread. Bear in mind I am not saying that the things directed at Luke by Holly and others here on this board are not deserved...Luke no doubt does deserve a lot of the criticism he gets. Furthermore my previous statements lauding Holly for NOT attacking Luke behind his back are highlighted by her frankness and candor in being critical of him HERE in "public"...in other words she does have the "brass" to say things in the open, and at the same time the dignity and grace to NOT do so excessively in private where the other person cannot defend himself, a rather noble trait.

As far as whether Holly would bang a dude in a wheelchair, I am sure Holly is an "equal opportunity banger" when it comes to selecting her relationships and sex partners, regardless of whether they use a wheelchair, Golf cart, Rascal, little red wagon or skateboard to get around!

Then again during one of our deeper more intelligent discussions, I did ask Holly whether or not she felt F.D.R. would have been elected if he were alive during Television and she said "NO", so ......
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?

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#260636 - 07/21/07 04:46 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
The Ghost Is Toast Offline
Whoremaster

Registered: 10/21/05
Posts: 2710
Quote:

Quote:

Quote:


Quote:

3. Any time he starts a thread with the line "I feel we have failed insert porn name here"
4. I bet he still has that leather jacket too.
5. On the plus side, he's Burg's love rival.




HA! Love Rival? Dude, Holly made it perfectly clear to me that, while I do have a few good qualities, I could NEVER even Hope to compete with Luke when it comes to this area. And I accept this because, in tune with her compassionate and HONEST nature, she didnt want to give me, da burglar, any false hope that might lead to heartache and pain down the road when she takes another man (probably not Luke but who knows..?) to the XPT prom instead of ME! SHe made it very clear that I am a good dear friend, but that she doesnt do anything with four wheels.





[tritone]Holly Randall has refused to do guys in wheelchairs during her whole performing career so I urge guys in wheelchairs to not attend her shows or buy her videos.[/tritone]





I do not quite understand the "tritone" part of the above...but Everyone knows I am just being satirical right?




It refers to THIS thread, Burg.

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#260637 - 07/24/07 09:31 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
PorntoBorn Offline
Rob Black's Crack Pipe

Registered: 01/12/07
Posts: 55
Loc: Corner of Canoga and Saticoy
Quote:

Quote:

Yet another reason why Ford is a complete dipshit...




Hold it right there. You know P2B, I'm really enjoying Reverend Des' stuff a lot more than yours. For one thing, he's a lot easier to read; he understands the function of paragraphs and punctuation. And, well, he's a hell of a lot funnier than you. Why don't you sit down and let the old man show you how it's done.




Hey, you wanna laugh, turn on Comedy Channel. I'm making profound points here, bippy. Now let's not get off subject, which is Luke Ford - sexually repressed dipshit.

Speaking of which, Holly, did you ever do the dirty deed with the guy? If so, what kind of a lay was he? I really mean no disrespect to you, and if the answer is too personal/private, I understand. But I'd really be curious. I just don't see him as any kind of super freak in bed.
_________________________
"I can relate to Larry Craig. Like the good senator from Idaho, I am not gay, but I do like, on occasion, to prowl airport men's rooms for a little hot man-on-man action. Again, that doesn't make me gay." -Jamesn

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#260638 - 07/24/07 09:40 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Holly Randall Offline
Chronic Masturbator

Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
Quote:


Speaking of which, Holly, did you ever do the dirty deed with the guy? If so, what kind of a lay was he? I really mean no disrespect to you, and if the answer is too personal/private, I understand. But I'd really be curious. I just don't see him as any kind of super freak in bed.





Believe it or not, I won't talk about such personal issues when it involves another person. Even when it's Luke.
_________________________
I really try to retain a respectful distance from my models, even when I'm lubing up their pussies.

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#260639 - 07/24/07 10:01 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Moxie Offline
Human Garbage

Registered: 06/23/06
Posts: 1557
Loc: New York
Quote:

Quote:


Speaking of which, Holly, did you ever do the dirty deed with the guy? If so, what kind of a lay was he? I really mean no disrespect to you, and if the answer is too personal/private, I understand. But I'd really be curious. I just don't see him as any kind of super freak in bed.





Believe it or not, I won't talk about such personal issues when it involves another person. Even when it's Luke.




OK. Tell us about when it doesn't involve another person
_________________________
"This thing is ready to do damage!"

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#260640 - 07/24/07 11:46 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Smartt Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/30/03
Posts: 5869
Loc: Instead of looking at the girl...
All I know is that Luke cracks me up every time. Hating Luke is like hating girls like this one.

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#260641 - 07/25/07 05:50 AM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:

Hey, you wanna laugh, turn on Comedy Channel. I'm making profound points here, bippy




I never thought I'd say this, but Smartt's absolutly right. Luke is pure comedy Gold. And having the "Reverend Des" castigate him here just makes it even more hilarious. You want to make profound points, go on the McLaughlin Group, Bippy.

Come to think of it, you're pretty amusing yourself. After all, you've got what has to be the dumbest user name in my recollection. What the fuck is that? "PorntoBorn???" What are you, dyslexic or something? Why don't you try and take your GED? Maybe you'll learn some syntax and grammar.

Now I have a question for the Reverend Des: What do you think of your son's blasphemy in yesterday's LA Times, wherein he repeatedly compares hiimself to Jesus? I'd be interested in your take on this.

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#260642 - 07/25/07 08:33 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
PorntoBorn Offline
Rob Black's Crack Pipe

Registered: 01/12/07
Posts: 55
Loc: Corner of Canoga and Saticoy
Quote:

Quote:

Hey, you wanna laugh, turn on Comedy Channel. I'm making profound points here, bippy





Come to think of it, you're pretty amusing yourself. After all, you've got what has to be the dumbest user name in my recollection.




Yeah, you're right. It's not nearly as clever as "Jim B." OMFG......

Shit dude, the least you could do is call yourself "Jim B. - Luke F. apologist."

_________________________
"I can relate to Larry Craig. Like the good senator from Idaho, I am not gay, but I do like, on occasion, to prowl airport men's rooms for a little hot man-on-man action. Again, that doesn't make me gay." -Jamesn

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#260643 - 07/25/07 08:52 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Anonymous
Unregistered


Jim B's my name, like jamesn, Willie D, Sergio "Chico" Travieso and several others here. Yours is simply dyslexic and dumb.

I've given Luke more shit on this board than you could possibly dream up. My problem with you is that, well, your material sucks. It's not funny, it has no point and it's nothing that hasn't been said before.

Keep it up, though. You're well on your way to being named Dumbfuck of the Week.

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#260644 - 07/25/07 10:00 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
the unknown pervert Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 03/22/07
Posts: 5186
Loc: Joshua Tree National Park
Quote:

Keep it up, though. You're well on your way to being named Dumbfuck of the Week.




Sorry but the best he can do is be named Dumbfuck of the Weeks that Donny Long and Ryan Knox Don't Post.
_________________________
I would eat Allie Sin's asshole until I got an emotion out of her.-Jerkules

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#260645 - 07/25/07 10:41 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Anonymous
Unregistered


Dumbfuck of the Week is really an amateur Title. Donnie won it his first week here. But now that he's elevated himself to Grandmaster status, he's ineligible. As for Knox, he turned pro years ago. They compete in a much more elite league than P2B.

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#260646 - 07/26/07 12:00 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
RyanKnox Offline
Broccoli Buy Piss Mop
Chronic Masturbator

Registered: 10/25/05
Posts: 1802
Loc: Getting pissed on
Must suck to be just a fan.

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#260647 - 07/26/07 12:25 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Conky Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
Must suck to be you. No real porn career, zero earning potential in later life and writing begging letters to take part in bukkake shoots when mommy and daddy can't meet your bills.

Living the dream, Ryan. Living the dream.
_________________________
I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH

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#260648 - 07/26/07 12:27 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
RyanKnox Offline
Broccoli Buy Piss Mop
Chronic Masturbator

Registered: 10/25/05
Posts: 1802
Loc: Getting pissed on
You got shit all wrong bud, I Don't work for JM, I don't talk to my parents and I get a lot more financial support from your 3rd world mama.


Edited by RyanKnox (07/26/07 12:28 PM)

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#260649 - 07/26/07 12:38 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Conky Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
You don't work for JM. Anymore.

Ryan, with so many scenes shot each week and comparatively few guys to go round, you should have a lot more work.

You don't.

Speaks volumes, doesn't it?

My mom's First World, incidentally. That's where people with money live. You've probably seen footage of it on that black and white TV you got from Goodwill.
_________________________
I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH

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#260650 - 07/26/07 02:32 PM Re: What Makes Luke Ford Such a Complete Dipshit?
Anonymous
Unregistered


Quote:

Must suck to be just a fan.




Actually, Knox, I'm a judge, not a fan. In fact, i'm the only Judge and Jury, since i invented Dumbfuck of the Week, and have been the only person to give out said award. Like I said, you're just waaayyy overqualified to compete. You should be proud of being in such a special catagory. It makes you eligible for all kinds of Government programs. Hot Lunch. Free de-lousing. Plus you get to ride on your own special bus. it's the short one parked out front.

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#260651 - 07/26/07 10:10 PM Luke Is Everywhere
Anonymous
Unregistered


He's even on my e-mail:



Attachments
251132-1lukequote.JPG (11 downloads)


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#260652 - 07/27/07 02:13 PM Re: Luke Is Everywhere
RyanKnox Offline
Broccoli Buy Piss Mop
Chronic Masturbator

Registered: 10/25/05
Posts: 1802
Loc: Getting pissed on
Luke Sucks, to stay in relevance with this thread.

Sorry Conk, I've just been too busy with real porn to give a shit about the bukkakes, sorry. Here are some emoticons that you may find helpful my personal favorite sorry guys, I'm fresh outta comebacks.

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