12. Make sure you have party supplies lined up.
13. Be ready to deal with addiction issues.
14. Don't give her a set of keys to your house/apartment.
15. Don't rely on her feeding your cats while you are out of town.
16. Don't be surprised if she turns out to be a slut with others.
17. The less money you give her the better.
18. Don't expect her to be good in bed.
19. If you have a heart, put it into a safe deposit box.
20. Look in the mirror and with a straight face repeat 100 times: "I am not a suitcase pimp."