I have been a Yankee Fan since I was old enough to talk...but right now I hate my team and what they have become. Enter, Alex Rodriguez, a 25 million dollar shithead with a gorgeous wife and two kids who felt it necessary last week to hit the Toronto strip club scene with a (at best) moderately hot blond bimbo...at the same time I, da burg, just so happened to be IN Toronto for a wedding, Bar Mitzvah and to unload a tidy sum of 2003 Canadian dollars I had accidentally-on-purpose forgotten about....

When the story broke, I was just waking up that morning with a Category 4 hangover, drinking tap water out of one of my friend's 5 bathrooms in his log cabin-mansion on the outskirts of the city....I was upset, seeing and hearing the story. I decided to do my own investigating.

The Yankess were all staying at the Park-Hyatt in Toronto, but 'Nim-Rod' had gotten himself and goldilocks a room apparently at the Four Seasons, where the photos were snapped that later appeared in the NY POST. I have eaten dinner several times at Harbour Sixty, the steakhouse where Stray-Rod and Goldi had dead cow for supper....I went inside and asked a hostess named Gloria (or it might have been Glenda, who the fuck knows, I couldnt hear amidst all the chatter about, you guessed it, A-Rod) for any tidbits...after 50 dollars canadian (Canada's Dollar is worth almost 95 cents american btw, a 23 year high) she told me they were kissing in the Harbour Sixty VIP towncar they took from the restaurant after dinner to the Strip club, Toronto's infamous "Brass Rail"

The Brass rail is an All nude, extremely glitzy club, awesome beer selection and a helluva a sound system...I have been there 4 times....the lap dances (done by gorgeous international chicks) are ALWAYS 20 bucks (canadian), but of course, if you tip the girl enough, it will become much more than a nude lap dance.

Now use your imaginations...A-rod and the blond were there for about 90 minutes....A-rod is far far FAR wealthier than me....yet The Very last time I was in the Brass Rail for zany antics (just before x-mas time, 2005), I finger fucked a chick named Tatyana from Kiev to the tune of Smithereens "Blood and Roses"...it ran about 120 bucks, with several free drinks thrown in....now what do you suppose a-rod and his blond do/did in such a situation???? Sadly I was with several jew friends who wouldnt stay long enough for me to find out EXACTLY what they did....


Note: During this past weekend's Yankees Redsox series in Boston, A-rod bought his wife a 6000 dollar necklace....CHEAP motherfucker, at least Kobe Bryant-the rapist bought his wife a 4 million dollar ring!