Some porn stories just fade away and people forget about them. If you have any updates on them, can you please spill the dirt and bring us up to date.

{P}Rick Shameless. Man this guy was on the high road...director for American Hardcore, married to Tory Lane, everyone falling over themselves to see him and Mickey Avalon at the big party. Then he gets caught putting him hand over some papers for the whores to sign, which are actually release forms allowing him to sell the stills from the shoots. No more AH and Tory dumps his ass. Did he actually accomplish the unimaginable and get flushed all the way out of porn?

Martin del Taco. Oh, boy was this a big shitstorm on XPT. Porn was going to arrange a huge armed front and run this douchebag out of the country. Last news was that his sham "marriage" to Haley Paige was annulled, Taco was pretending to be a big-time video producer. What happened at the INS hearing?

Genesis Skye. A favorite, what with the multiple drug meltdowns, the infamous Tony Malice whiteboard "editing," the comeback as Kaydence Price, I just want to know what dumpster she lives by in Reseda, I hear most of the McDonald's ones are already taken by Chasey Lain.

*ahem* the JM obscenity bust. Wasn't the prosecution trying to fast-track this thing, a year and a half ago? Last I heard was that this case became part of the lore for the DA firings, and that things were further complicated by the fact that the U.S. Small Business Administration had been adjudicating the bankruptcy petition of Castle Superstores (meaning in effect the feds were condoning, if not helping to manage, a pornographic business).

Speaking of legal woes, what's going on with the $400,000 breach of contract suit against Shy Love and her suitcase pimp? I know she had to give a deposition a few months ago, God that must have been a golden moment. I'll pay for a copy of the transcript.

Joe Francis. The dude has been rotting in jail for being a spoiled little brat in court, last I heard he was acting so fucked up in jail they had to send in a shrink to determine if he was competent to even stand trial. Is he really a nutcase, or porn's Cpl. Klinger?

Alyssa West. All I want to know is: did someone get the baby a birthday present, how many stretch marks, and is she still selling her vagina for money on Sunset Blvd?