i have an idea! fuck toilet paper all together! let sheryl adapt her "dining sleeve" idea and design clothing bottoms with removable crotch liners to absorb all that poop, pee, and crotch sweat. i'm sure at least someone would go for it, if it meant not having to listen to "everyday is a winding road" ever, ever again.
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"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way." --Handful