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#229901 - 03/18/07 03:46 PM
Agents- Listen Up!!!
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Stolen from another website.......
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Except Derek, Mark, and Joel, who have their shit together, as is obvious.
I think this might be an appropriate place to post what isn't very obvious to most of the other agents working this silly Porno Game right now:
1) The day before you've booked your talent for a job, you need to call and confirm the booking...for example, let's say today is March 16, and I have 3 of your girls booked for March 17...call sometime during the day (which is before the sun sets) and say something like, "Hey Jim, are we still on for tomorrow?"
2) While you're at it, make sure you address what clothing your talent is supposed to bring to my set, and please follow through with your talent that she does, indeed, possess that kind of clothing. For example, "Hey Jim, what does (fill in porno whore name here) need to bring to wear?" Then, ask your talent later if she has that kind of wardrobe in her Porno Travel Bag.
2a) Take a second or two and ask me if I'll have make-up on set, and then make sure you relay that information as well to your talent.
3) Let's make sure the talent is clear on who (or what) it is they're fucking...this way, you'll stop embarrassing yourself, and the girls don't have to haul ass out of my studio under the guise of "forgetting something" in their car -- or simply leaving -- cause they weren't told who their male talent was.
4) Ever see those cool little folders LA Direct gives their girls? You know...the ones with copies of their tests and ID's? Score 15 genius points for Derek...no wonder he drives a super turbo Lamborghini Ferrari race car pussy magnet sled.
4a) If making folders is too costly, or too difficult, just make sure your talent has proper ID's when they show up to work. Proper ID's, according to 2257, is a US state or US Government-issued picture ID. For example, a driver's license, or state ID car, or US passport, or a military ID.
4b) Take a moment and make sure your talent is indeed over the age of 18. If not, don't take them to Korea Town and pay $300 for a fake ID in order for you to make a couple grand on the expense of our entire business...just wait a few months til they're legal.
4c) Your talent doesn't need off-camera lessons on how to fuck doggystyle, reverse cowgirl, or pile-driver. They've been doing that since they turned 13. It's just a good idea if you want to keep talent around longer than a week.
4d) And if your talent is making money, they'll probably stick around longer than a week...and if they're not, they won't. So don't blame anyone but yourself for not getting them work.
5) Buck up and apologize when you fuck up. It's another really smart marketing tool, designed by a team of Wharton College Professors to make clients happy so they'll continue to remain clients. Here's an example those Wharton Professors give their potential MBA students: Hey (fill in name here) -- I'm sorry I fucked up. It won't happen again...is there any way I can make this up to you so we can continue to do business?
5a) Don't have your silly assistant call with a made-up excuse on why your talent won't be on my set. Porno Land is a small land, and I'll find out why she wasn't there...and no, she wasn't "sick" or "out of town"...just on a job that paid her more...even though I booked her a month before they did.
I think I'm going to train a chimp on how to be an agent so I can make some extra money...I'm fairly confident my chimp has the potential to be the 4th biggest agency all across the Porno Land.
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Some notes of my own from this informative rant from Jim of Bachelor Pad Productions.
3)--- Do most girls actually get a say in whom there fucking? Meaning a girl who's Fresh off the Bus doesn’t know unless she’s watched a good amount of porn the difference between one guy or the other. Now I fully understand a Veteran performer who has a list of preferred male talent that they would like to work with. But get real....Are the girls looking for a "love connection" or looking at it as a job....one that they are making quick $$$ and requires absolutely no skill...wtf?
And
4c)--- Once again Regan Senter is da man....he has inspired millions of suitcase pimps.
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#229903 - 03/18/07 04:14 PM
Re: Agents- Listen Up!!!
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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Quote:
...
3)--- Do most girls actually get a say in whom there fucking? Meaning a girl who's Fresh off the Bus doesn’t know unless she’s watched a good amount of porn the difference between one guy or the other. Now I fully understand a Veteran performer who has a list of preferred male talent that they would like to work with. But get real....Are the girls looking for a "love connection" or looking at it as a job....one that they are making quick $$$ and requires absolutely no skill...wtf?
I'm pretty sure this is the part of the transaction where the girls are allowed to refuse to fuck guys who shoot gay porn or fuck trannies, or refuse to fuck skurt lackwood. Are you so stupid you don't think they deserve that option?
I mean I know you're stupid but are you that stupid? 
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#229904 - 03/18/07 04:40 PM
Re: Agents- Listen Up!!!
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Quote:
Quote:
...
3)--- Do most girls actually get a say in whom there fucking? Meaning a girl who's Fresh off the Bus doesn’t know unless she’s watched a good amount of porn the difference between one guy or the other. Now I fully understand a Veteran performer who has a list of preferred male talent that they would like to work with. But get real....Are the girls looking for a "love connection" or looking at it as a job....one that they are making quick $$$ and requires absolutely no skill...wtf?
I'm pretty sure this is the part of the transaction where the girls are allowed to refuse to fuck guys who shoot gay porn or fuck trannies, or refuse to fuck skurt lackwood. Are you so stupid you don't think they deserve that option?
I mean I know you're stupid but are you that stupid?
Damn B man.....I can understand the tranny thing....but my understanding is that would have been discussed upfront...at least on the "application" just as the newbie girls that don’t like it in the butt don’t have to go ahead and do the Mandingo anal challenge. My point being is that there is a limited amount of "proven male talent" to begin with. Why should you widdle down your suggested talent pool to a few guys...Hell they should have what Star world modeling had awhile back....a list and b list talent. Do the math man....If they only pick out 3 guys and one cant work cause hes already booked up...the other in europe shooting and the other is on vacation....what choice does the whore have then? I guess she can tell her dealer and landlord that the guys she fucks for a living is not available and she she needs a front and and a few more weeks for the rent.. 
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#229906 - 03/18/07 06:10 PM
Re: Agents- Listen Up!!!
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 08/18/05
Posts: 285
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This is interesting. I wonder what girls see the male talent and then just "disappear." I heard a rumor that Jenaveve Jolie (thee finest talent in porn) showed up on set, saw her male talent (some wretched anglo guy), and straight walked the f-ck out!
Do any of you guys (in the industry) know any stories of girls walking off the set because they can't bear to work with the male talent???
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#229907 - 03/18/07 06:27 PM
Re: Agents- Listen Up!!!
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Quote:
This is interesting. I wonder what girls see the male talent and then just "disappear." I heard a rumor that Jenaveve Jolie (thee finest talent in porn) showed up on set, saw her male talent (some wretched anglo guy), and straight walked the f-ck out!
Do any of you guys (in the industry) know any stories of girls walking off the set because they can't bear to work with the male talent???
Kris, well outside of the looks factor....in AIM Porno 101 it reminds talent both male and female in regards to proper general hygiene (AKA, Bathing)....so that ax could swing both ways....it also covered smelly pussy (AKA, Bacterial Vaginosis)...wonder just how many male talent refused to work with the hottest chick in porno land....who had a stinky pussy.
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#229908 - 03/18/07 06:46 PM
Re: Agents- Listen Up!!!
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@
Porn Jesus
Registered: 10/19/06
Posts: 9958
Loc: fortified
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So self admittedly you porn idiots need a scientific "2 finger sniff test"? I learned that shit when I was 16.
Hey Dino- useless spambot -Velvet..How much could I make consulting on said subject..theoretically?
BTW.. You come off as the Tony George of porn.
- Just sayin.
_________________________
i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#229909 - 03/18/07 06:53 PM
Re: Agents- Listen Up!!!
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Quote:
So self admittedly you porn idiots need a scientific "2 finger sniff test"? I learned that shit when I was 16.
Hey Dino- useless spambot -Velvet..How much could I make consulting on said subject..theoretically?
BTW.. You come off as the Tony George of porn.
- Just sayin.
just googled Tony George....cant find shit....help me out Lou
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#229911 - 03/18/07 07:05 PM
Re: Agents- Listen Up!!!
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Quote:
Dino
Quote:
Quote:
So self admittedly you porn idiots need a scientific "2 finger sniff test"? I learned that shit when I was 16.
Hey Dino- useless spambot -Velvet..How much could I make consulting on said subject..theoretically?
BTW.. You come off as the Tony George of porn.
- Just sayin.
just googled Tony George....cant find shit....help me out Lou
Fuck it..8mm is an awesome movie.. It's like Josey Wales for the porn loser community or what Metallica is to Motorhead.
You're off the hook..keep up the good work!!
Lemmy is god 
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#229914 - 03/19/07 05:48 AM
Re: Agents- Listen Up!!!
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 07/20/03
Posts: 5256
Loc: CSW Wrestling - Gracie Academy
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Quote:
Quote:
Except Derek, Mark, and Joel, who have their shit together, as is obvious.
Is that to say Bad Ass Frank, Chris Caine and Chico T. are worthless, amongst countless other up & coming agencies?
Damn, I had so much faith in these fine upstanding individuals!
No Schitt. Jim of Bachelor Pad Productions ( the originator of the post) has never booked with me, so that doesn't apply to me. Bottom line is I have only had one girl flake one time. I've been lucky. When I book, I get all the info that I need to make sure everything goes smooth. This goes back to owning an escort company. Don't know how the other agents run things, nor do I care.
_________________________
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#229916 - 03/20/07 12:32 AM
Re: Agents- Listen Up!!!
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Quote:
The guy who wrote that shoots Blacks on Blondes
Err, nevermind.
Edited by jack_schitt (03/20/07 12:34 AM)
_________________________
Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#229917 - 03/20/07 07:08 PM
Re: Agents- Listen Up!!!
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 08/18/05
Posts: 285
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It's interesting that you say that. Let me ask you this: If you had the opportunity to work with a gracious and gorgeous female talent and you looked between her legs and saw this ...what would you do?
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#229919 - 03/21/07 02:21 PM
Re: Agents- Listen Up!!!
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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