Magdalena
(Kaylan/Zappa)

Here are the ingredients for the Nestle's chocolates that you turkeys eat
every day, ahaa!

There was a man a little old man
Who lived in Montreal
With a wife and a kid
And a car and a house
And a teen-age daughter
With a see-thru blouse
Who loved to grunt and ball -
And her name was Magdalena

Magdalena . . .

The little ole man
Came home one night
To his house in Montreal
He caught his daughter
In the blouse by the night
And he said to himself:
"She looks alright!"
he reached for a tit
And grabbed it tight
And threw her up against the wall, oh no
(BLUE CROSS!)

Magdalena,

My daughter dear, do not be concerned
When your Canadian daddy comes near
My daughter dear, do not be concerned
When your Canadian daddy comes near
I work so hard, don't you understand
Making maple syrup for the pancakes of our land
Do you have any idea
What that can do to a man?
What that can do to a man?
Do you have any idea
What that can do to a man?
What that can do to a man?

Magdalena . . .

The little ol' man with the grubby little hand
Who lived in Montreal
Was drooling a bit
As he reached for a tit
And he said to himself:
"This is gonna be it!"
But the girl turned around and said: "Go eat shit"
And ran on down the hall
Right on, Magdalena!

[repeat 3rd verse]

Magdalena don't you tease me like this
In the hallway with your blouse and your tits
If your mommy ever finds us like this
She'll call a lawyer
Oh how mom will be pissed

DOODLE DOODLE DOODLE DUH-DUH DEE-UH [4x]
Magdalena, Magdalena, Magdalena, Magdalena, my little tiny poontang fondue.....
I love to take you out with me Magdalena. Owww, walking down the streets of Montreux together we'll go, by the coo-coo clocks and the cheese shops.
And Magdalena can you see us ice skating together, oh baby. Can you see us skying together on the slopes of our choice. Not you, no, Magdalena my little daughter. My own little daughter. My little infant. I remember when they brought you home from the hospital Magdalena and your mother showed me to you and I said: That's, well it's all purple and stuff. And she said honey don't worry, soon that little girl is gonna have a set of bosooms on her you won't believe. And Magdalena the eternal prophecy has come through. I looked at you in the hallway yesterday, your wearing your little Afghanistan see-thru embroidered blouse and your little nipples were protruding . . . and I said to me self: "My God, my God, I gave my sperm to that thing' . . . I'm hard as a rock And Magdalena I had to reach out in the darkness. I had to reach out in the darkness like Friend and Lover say . . . And I grabbed your litttle bossooms . . . And your mother walked in the door and she said: "Harry, nice weather, we're neutral here."
But I reached out and I grabbed her . . .
[rest of text inaudible]