An XPT Week or so in REVIEW


XPT rule: No Donkeys Allowed. At least not for Long.

Don't make fun of a Hitler lover when he's Bering his soul. He's got a tough enough time dealing with the realization that he isn't Strait.
The Paige-Hwang marriage lasted scarcely longer than the time it would take to play Paige's 300 porn DVDs end to end.
Our Wolfpac girl will have sex with anyone who shows her a tattoo of a Tazmanian Devil.
They do test for Down's Syndrome and Severe Retardation at AIM, but it is not required by the industry and costs extra.


A walk through a Tokyo AV store … in pictures ...
In one burst of power, one violent spray of gamma rays, she lensed her energy to kill an object of her hatred.
It's weird how he thinks being a pervert and being an American are mutually exclusive.
It's fitting that Powder is obsessed with a Gram.
Why don't you rent a house with the girl traveling through the house to get the spunk caked in her pretty face.
Inked, pink and no reason to think.
Courtney Simpson makes less an hour giving a bare back blowjob than I did consulting on TimeSlips software.
Yeah, I know you're going but what I meant was: Is anyone going who I don't want to throw a cup of pee at.


Apparently she just shit on the couch and made that Mike guy clean it up. Thank God I missed it.
Ryan Knox degradation revival! Reverse Bukkake #3 revisited.
Shy Love Facing Foreclosure - Will they repossess those enormous tusks for the ivory?
When ADT unlocks the "Type Three Words" thread, in no particular order, post the following words: Enemas, Tanks, Hookers.
AdultCon 14: The flea-market of porn conventions.
Holly Randall's dad rejected Darth's sexual advances, and Darth becomes fixated on her horse ... Ironic since Suze says her hubby's hung like one.
666 is a "fuzokuten" or "fashion health".


Poll winners:
Scroll Wheel Enablers: DaBurglar, Darth and Tritone. Win. Place. Show.
Which Steven's "sister" is more retarded? TOO CLOSE TO CALL.
Ironically XPT chooses to have a beer with non-drinkers Scott Fayner & Luke Ford. Get Luke a water and Fayner a line.


I just told all my friends that I inspired and begat an entire porn series. They told me to go outside and get off the internet.
Attention talent with severe peanut allergies, please contact "That's What She Said" via PM for casting info.
Donny Long trapped in the past. Thinks the "Bump" is still in vogue.
Gigi & Pretty, are invited one of Skeeter's shoots. Be warned however, he will talk you into getting in front of the camera.
Most beautiful non-porn girl: Charlize Theron.
"Gaijin" is the casual version of the more formal "Gaikokujin", which means foreigner.


JM Productions presents 12 Angry Men Bukkake: 12 frustrated jurors deal out justice on a guilty whore...the JM way.
Maybe Chico just got what he deserved?
Most ironic is the "Daddy's Little Girl" tattoo on a porn whore who is getting jackhammered by two black dudes.
It's an excuse they use to bullshit THEMSELVES.
Violet Blue vs. Violet Blue.
A "Darth month" is 9 days long.


In "Educating Sasha" tutors tire of Sasha's psuedo intellectual whining and brutally fuck her when-ever she mentions existentialism.
Existence precedes essence, you worthless whore.


He had debased her beyond reason, and left her with more than enough drugs to finish the job.
Tattoos have had a mixed history in Japan.
Drunken Gunker: Self-appointed forum traffic light.
Gia's Sinsation party pics a complete sensation!!!!!!
Kimber Lace is a LezOnly bitch currently taking centerstage on FatMan's Terabytes.
Bornyo is convinced BIFF gets off on Renfield's picture in some kind of sexual way.


Donny Long is the new Kurt Lockwood. Stop talking about it.
Kurt Lockwood is ALL IN the tranny pool, and he's cool with it.
Anytime Pamela Peaks appears to be giving a guy a BJ with that face-like appendage ... that's really anal with her prolapsed rectum acting as tongue.
Example of a Bad Habit: Watch porn movies from beginning to end to fully appreciate all the plot subtleties and nuances the actors bring to their rolls.
Spaghetti sauce in tuna salad is FatMan approved.

To Tritone: We don't feel the color of the lie should be an issue.
Ceara's date mystery solved … Spring Break II: Soft Hand Boogaloo.
This is worse than watching Ryan Knox try to fuck things.


El G [sic]: The problem is that you born in USA and english is your 1st language and your english is shittier than mine.
Gigi to CXXX: Girls bleed. Get over it. Thank you.
Douche: FatMan, you're like two girls one cup … full of shit.
Monica Foster, chlamydia victim: Yes I'm pulling the race and sex card again.
Zenman: Do the guys making the movies think the squirting is real?


XPT Whore of the Month: Cameron Keys 'cause she's so white trashy.


Donny Long's 19th Century April Heroes:
Adolf Hitler: Born April 20.
John Wilkes Booth: Murdered Lincoln April 14-15.


XPT Newswire Headlines
Yale student induces miscarriages for Art Project.
Ohio Science Teacher Burns Crosses Onto Students.
Man attempts to steal panties with a hatchet.
Rash of 50 detergent suicides in Japan.
16 year old Utah girl uses fake ID to get dance job at strip club.



Soon to be in production:
Chitty Chitty Gang Bang.
Schindler's Fist.
There Will be Cum.
Dr StrangeCock: or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Gag the Whores.





REMINDER: FatMan has one day left to post a TWINS update or he had to leave the board forever.




Happy birthday Caroline.