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#211315 - 12/31/06 09:24 PM
What's happening in my house right this minute...
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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I am throwing a mini-new years bash. I invited 15 people total...there are 23 people here right now and I just got a phone call from someone named Devon (a Dude) who said he is on his way over with "the gang"...?? I dont know anyone named Devon...
I made an early dinner for myself and my date, a 41 year old MILF from Santa Rosa I have dated a few times since I moved up here. She owns her own successful business so I am comfortable dating her without fear she is simply a gold digger. We ate at 4:30, I made Chicken Parmagiana using free range, organically fed hens and organic ingredients, a Salad, with Shrimp Cocktail as a appetizer. She had 4-1/2 glasses of wine before and during dinner, and another 3 or 4 after when people started showing up. I think she smoked a joint also while I was on the phone...anyway, she is now passed out on my Sofa in my Den 10 feet from me...I just had a Animal House-Pinto moment with an angel and Devil on both my shoulders telling me what I should do with her...
Meanwhile, there are 6 people (4 dudes, 2 chicks) out on my Pool Deck having sex...7 people are playing poker (5 dudes, and 2 chicks...the chicks are winning, up at least 800 bucks between them both, probably because the guys are half cocked from drinking my keg of Eye of the Hawk Ale...) the remaining people are sitting around my living room, eating all my organic snack foods and smoking pot...it's pretty cold up here but I have most of the windows open.
I think this sucks...I should have rented a hotel room in San Fran and paid for a date. Probably would have cost 3 or 4 grand but at least my house would be clean and safe. Never shit where you live...or sleep
Actually, I wish I was in Boston, specifically either at the Charles Hotel (james knows it well) ... or at some blue collar bar in Somerville, CG Coogles, singing Danny Boy with all my 1/2 Irish 1/2 Portugese friends.
2-1/2 hours until 2007, yippee....
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#211316 - 01/01/07 07:50 AM
Re: What's happening in my house right this minute
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 07/30/06
Posts: 1712
Loc: at the end of the longest line
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Sounds like your New Year's Eve was better than mine.
The pukes and the shits, all day and all night.
Now that sucked.
_________________________
Twitter.com/degraderzim
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#211317 - 01/01/07 02:06 PM
Re: What's happening in my house right this minute
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 12/30/06
Posts: 55
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#211318 - 01/01/07 05:05 PM
Re: What's happening in my house right this minute
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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i've actually decided i like the inn at harvard better. not fancy, but soo fucking easy. i've got some truly appalling stories about behavior there over the last few years, but ghostshadow's watching and i don't want him to live vicariously through me more than he does.
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#211319 - 01/02/07 03:55 AM
Re: What's happening in my house right this minute...
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Why a hotel room costing 3 or 4 grand? A $500 room on New Year's Eve would've suited you and your guests just fine.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#211321 - 01/02/07 10:46 AM
Re: What's happening in my house right this minute
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Naw, it's the teddy bear soaked in jizz that Burg always refer to in his "10 Questions with___" interviews.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#211322 - 01/02/07 11:03 AM
Re: What's happening in my house right this minute
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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Casualty List: 2 goldfish Someone scratched my picture window in my bedroom Cig butts in the Washing machine in the basement (I thought I had locked the door) ALL my food was pretty much eaten (fucking munchies) Track marks on the lawn, lots of them...which means I will need to brush up on the espanol when I call the Mexican who does a decent job with landscaping, except he is usually drunk by 2 pm. Someone did the old 'fake turd in the pool joke', a partially eaten Milky Way bar was seen floating on the pool's surface, then it sank...luckily no one turned on the heat otherwise it would have melted. All in all, it actually wasnt as bad as it could have been. James: I had a roomie who used to rent a room at the Harvard Inn everytime "reading period" came around before finals, he just couldnt get anything done in the dorm room with all the debauchery and shenanigans. Our greatest moment was "Six Kegs Over Qunicy House #5" during Spring Semester reading period 1990, 2 days before exams started...we went through 5 kegs in 2-1/2 hours, possibly a school record....we saved keg #6 (and the reserve cases) for after exams.) Harvard now has a "Fun Czar"...back when I was there, I probably qualified as that. For some reason I found myself so nostalgic (i.e. Bored, sobriety does that to me) this New Years Eve. It sucks getting old...but the Charles was my favorite place to hang out (especially senior year), I used to play Chopsticks on the Piano in the lobby until the manager would ask me to stop...quite often people would put money in the flower pot atop the piano (back then I looked like a poor crippled drunk, which I basicaly was...one night I cleared 90 bucks, but I fucked up the piano and was asked not to return.) Gia - 3-4 grand INCLUDES the cost of my date, silly girl. But on New Yeaqrs eve, many of the hotels in San Fran were asking 800-900 bucks minimum... And finally to our newest annoying yet entertaining prick who is NOT the Monkey, Charles barkley: We have pictures of the evenings debauchery, but they are private since several prominent and succesful people were in attendance and dont want themselves plastered all over the net...however, if you want to see them, you can register and sign/certify to agree to keep them to yourself. Call my assistant/sex slave at 707-867-5309 and ask for Jenny. :bananavh1ilovethe80s: 
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#211323 - 01/02/07 11:18 AM
Re: What's happening in my house right this minute
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 12/30/06
Posts: 55
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Quote:
Casualty List:
2 goldfish
Someone scratched my picture window in my bedroom
Cig butts in the Washing machine in the basement (I thought I had locked the door)
ALL my food was pretty much eaten (fucking munchies)
Track marks on the lawn, lots of them...which means I will need to brush up on the espanol when I call the Mexican who does a decent job with landscaping, except he is usually drunk by 2 pm.
Someone did the old 'fake turd in the pool joke', a partially eaten Milky Way bar was seen floating on the pool's surface, then it sank...luckily no one turned on the heat otherwise it would have melted.
All in all, it actually wasnt as bad as it could have been.
James: I had a roomie who used to rent a room at the Harvard Inn everytime "reading period" came around before finals, he just couldnt get anything done in the dorm room with all the debauchery and shenanigans. Our greatest moment was "Six Kegs Over Qunicy House #5" during Spring Semester reading period 1990, 2 days before exams started...we went through 5 kegs in 2-1/2 hours, possibly a school record....we saved keg #6 (and the reserve cases) for after exams.) Harvard now has a "Fun Czar"...back when I was there, I probably qualified as that. For some reason I found myself so nostalgic (i.e. Bored, sobriety does that to me) this New Years Eve. It sucks getting old...but the Charles was my favorite place to hang out (especially senior year), I used to play Chopsticks on the Piano in the lobby until the manager would ask me to stop...quite often people would put money in the flower pot atop the piano (back then I looked like a poor crippled drunk, which I basicaly was...one night I cleared 90 bucks, but I fucked up the piano and was asked not to return.)
Gia - 3-4 grand INCLUDES the cost of my date, silly girl. But on New Yeaqrs eve, many of the hotels in San Fran were asking 800-900 bucks minimum...
And finally to our newest annoying yet entertaining prick who is NOT the Monkey, Charles barkley: We have pictures of the evenings debauchery, but they are private since several prominent and succesful people were in attendance and dont want themselves plastered all over the net...however, if you want to see them, you can register and sign/certify to agree to keep them to yourself. Call my assistant/sex slave at 707-867-5309 and ask for Jenny. :bananavh1ilovethe80s:
Admit it Burg, you haven't hobnobbed with prominent or successful people since Harvard gave you a pity diploma.
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