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Hey, it's New Year's Eve. I'm supporting Tony Bennett later tonite. We got gigs, people, gigs.

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On our 20th wedding anniversary I asked my wife what sort of gift she'd like. She said "I wanna go somewhere I haven't been before". I said, "Try the kitchen".

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"Goodfellas"

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"You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little fucked up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fuckin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?"