#2. TELL CONKY AND GONZO GIRL I LOVE THEM SOOO MUCH, TOO. I WANT TO THANK BOTH OF THEM FOR SHOWING ME SUCH DEVOTION LIKE THE ULTIMATE FANS OF MINE THEY SECRETLY REALLY ARE! TO KNOW EVERY SINGLE ASPECT OF MY LIFE? TRUE DEDICATION THAT PROVES, TRUE FANS TO THE BONE! KUDOS, HAHA. I'M GONNA THINK ABOUT THEM WHILE I FUCK SIX HOT GIRLS OVER THE NEXT THREE DAYS AND MAKE THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS, HAHA. (I'M DIRECTING MY NEW SERIES FOR SEX Z PICTURES, TEEN COCK ROCKERS #2.)

Kurt, Kurt. Where to start? First things first. I don't like you. I don't hate you. I just don't care about you. You do, however, irritate me in much the same way as a small pebble in my shoe would. Your massive ego is truly your downfall. It dominates your character completely and, if it wasn't for that, I suspect you'd be a likeable guy. I actually did admire your run-in with Jesus Baldwin (if what I read actually took place). I know nothing of your life other than the gruesome car wreckage I read online.

And now we come to the depressing side of your life. Your belief that fucking six girls will in any way, shape or form, impress me or make any difference as to how I go about my day. The fact that your life is so bereft of joy, so completely empty that you think that making notches on your bedpost is in any way impressive actually saddens me. I genuinely feel pity for you. There must be a terrible void in your life, but sex with women who have to be paid to suck you off will never, ever fill it. You are of a type, Kurt. I know many male performers who behave as if they never grew up. They collect porn starlets the way kids used to collect baseball cards. And at the end of the day, they can't maintain solid relationships with anyone inside or outside the business. Their 'friends' desert them when the money runs out, and they're left, empty and bereft. And even if the money doesn't run out, deep down, they're not truly happy. How can they be, when they realize that the life they pursued has been absolute illusion? Life is not about who has the most toys. Not ultimately, as you lie dying in a bed. No. It's about being loved. And you, Kurt, unless you make a major life change, will never be truly loved. And deep down, you know that. It's why you go to such great lengths to over-compensate.

Sorry to disappoint you, Kurt. I've been in this business for a lot longer than you have, and thanks to that, I know a lot of truths which you patently choose to ignore.

You and I both know how many units gonzo sells globally, so please don't piss down my back and tell me it's raining, Kurt. The golden age of porn was long ago, and I don't need a crystal ball to tell me that the porn recession is going to get better.

Good luck in your efforts to suckseed, Kurt. You've certainly got self-belief on your side, if not any sort of cinematography qualification or sense of humility.