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#199179 - 11/02/06 07:08 AM
this is my first post
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Bukkake Boy
Registered: 08/23/06
Posts: 635
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so my wondering is this- does anyone else feel bad? my taste in pornography runs towards the more extreme. i like to watch max hardcore be mean to women. and i feel bad about it. not bad enough to stop watching, but bad nonetheless. after my load is shot, i often feel regret. shame. guilt. after all, what is wrong with me? why do i need to see what amounts to simulated rape to get off? i do not care for what my taste in jerking-off material says about me as a human being. sure, it is fantasy, but my fantasy is distasteful. i cannot share this fantasy with my girlfriend, despite the fact that she is very understanding and accepting of such things. it is, plain and simple, too much to admit to. once the deed is done, and my thoughts are clear once again, no amount of rationalization can change the fact that these are people whose suffering i just enjoyed. not whores, people. i can sit and analyze this all day, but it does not release me from the responsibility of this fact. clearly i am scared and initimidated by women, but why do i need to see them punished for my personal shortcomings? why do i actually want to see a young lady choked, peed on, puke all over herself, etc. to make up for the fact that i was too scared to ask some other girl to the prom? it has nothing to do with sex. it is abuse. my guilt is overpowering, sometimes. anyone else ever feel like this? and please don't give any answer about them simply being "whores". it is idiotic. they are people, and you know it. society and its expectations do not enter into it, either. no woman can possibly enjoy what is done to them in some of these videos. we are enjoying the abuse of another person, no more and no less. these "whores" are standing in for all the women we cannot relate to in our real lives. it is, to me, troubling. it reveals to me things about myself i do not wish to know. surely i am not the only one who ever did feel this way. but, anyway, typing about bitches being abused has got me all wound up and i have to go do the thing. please answer the question seriously. or at least be mean to me. 
_________________________
They're all human beings, and though she may be a liar and a manipulator, it's probably because she doesn't know any other way to survive.
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#199181 - 11/02/06 07:29 AM
Re: this is my first post
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Bukkake Boy
Registered: 08/23/06
Posts: 635
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thanks!
_________________________
They're all human beings, and though she may be a liar and a manipulator, it's probably because she doesn't know any other way to survive.
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#199184 - 11/02/06 09:12 AM
Re: this is my first post
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/14/03
Posts: 7408
Loc: JM Productions
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Quote:
so my wondering is this- does anyone else feel bad?
my taste in pornography runs towards the more extreme. i like to watch max hardcore be mean to women. and i feel bad about it. not bad enough to stop watching, but bad nonetheless. after my load is shot, i often feel regret. shame. guilt. after all, what is wrong with me? why do i need to see what amounts to simulated rape to get off? i do not care for what my taste in jerking-off material says about me as a human being. sure, it is fantasy, but my fantasy is distasteful. i cannot share this fantasy with my girlfriend, despite the fact that she is very understanding and accepting of such things. it is, plain and simple, too much to admit to. once the deed is done, and my thoughts are clear once again, no amount of rationalization can change the fact that these are people whose suffering i just enjoyed. not whores, people. i can sit and analyze this all day, but it does not release me from the responsibility of this fact. clearly i am scared and initimidated by women, but why do i need to see them punished for my personal shortcomings? why do i actually want to see a young lady choked, peed on, puke all over herself, etc. to make up for the fact that i was too scared to ask some other girl to the prom? it has nothing to do with sex. it is abuse. my guilt is overpowering, sometimes.
anyone else ever feel like this? and please don't give any answer about them simply being "whores". it is idiotic. they are people, and you know it. society and its expectations do not enter into it, either. no woman can possibly enjoy what is done to them in some of these videos. we are enjoying the abuse of another person, no more and no less. these "whores" are standing in for all the women we cannot relate to in our real lives. it is, to me, troubling. it reveals to me things about myself i do not wish to know. surely i am not the only one who ever did feel this way.
but, anyway, typing about bitches being abused has got me all wound up and i have to go do the thing. please answer the question seriously. or at least be mean to me.
_________________________
all women should be victims of something, because they lied. - big moose
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#199185 - 11/02/06 09:43 AM
Re: this is my first post
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Welcome back, CAOH. Using XPT shut down time to reincarnate yourself was interesting.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#199186 - 11/02/06 09:51 AM
Re: this is my first post
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Bukkake Boy
Registered: 08/23/06
Posts: 635
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he is not i. i am not him. i suppose i have no way to prove this, you'll just have to trust me. i am biting his style, though, just a little bit. but quit dodging the issue, y'all. answer the question, claire!
_________________________
They're all human beings, and though she may be a liar and a manipulator, it's probably because she doesn't know any other way to survive.
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#199187 - 11/02/06 09:58 AM
Re: this is my first post
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 10/30/06
Posts: 3812
Loc: Neither here, nor there.
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Quote:
so my wondering is this- does anyone else feel bad?
my taste in pornography runs towards the more extreme. i like to watch max hardcore be mean to women. and i feel bad about it. not bad enough to stop watching, but bad nonetheless. after my load is shot, i often feel regret. shame. guilt. after all, what is wrong with me? why do i need to see what amounts to simulated rape to get off? i do not care for what my taste in jerking-off material says about me as a human being. sure, it is fantasy, but my fantasy is distasteful. i cannot share this fantasy with my girlfriend, despite the fact that she is very understanding and accepting of such things. it is, plain and simple, too much to admit to. once the deed is done, and my thoughts are clear once again, no amount of rationalization can change the fact that these are people whose suffering i just enjoyed. not whores, people. i can sit and analyze this all day, but it does not release me from the responsibility of this fact. clearly i am scared and initimidated by women, but why do i need to see them punished for my personal shortcomings? why do i actually want to see a young lady choked, peed on, puke all over herself, etc. to make up for the fact that i was too scared to ask some other girl to the prom? it has nothing to do with sex. it is abuse. my guilt is overpowering, sometimes.
anyone else ever feel like this? and please don't give any answer about them simply being "whores". it is idiotic. they are people, and you know it. society and its expectations do not enter into it, either. no woman can possibly enjoy what is done to them in some of these videos. we are enjoying the abuse of another person, no more and no less. these "whores" are standing in for all the women we cannot relate to in our real lives. it is, to me, troubling. it reveals to me things about myself i do not wish to know. surely i am not the only one who ever did feel this way.
but, anyway, typing about bitches being abused has got me all wound up and i have to go do the thing. please answer the question seriously. or at least be mean to me.
Relax dude, it's a job. They're paid to do what they do, probably more than they should be in some cases. That's like saying you feel bad for a receptionist, or a doctor or something. If they don't like it, they can quit, and go flip burgers.
_________________________
"You know this is XXXPornTalk.com right? You sound like an ADT person. I want to poop on you." -Malice
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#199188 - 11/02/06 10:13 AM
Re: this is my first post
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Bukkake Boy
Registered: 08/23/06
Posts: 635
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i do not mean to imply that i feel great empathy for the actual performers, (though i sometimes do, when the onscreen situation is particularly nightmarish). i do not blame myself for whatever i might imagine these performers personal situations could be. the guilt is entirely related to me myself and i. why do i need to see these things? what's my problem? of course, your point is an interesting issue, too. it's all a rich tapestry. but right now i only care about my own self . 
_________________________
They're all human beings, and though she may be a liar and a manipulator, it's probably because she doesn't know any other way to survive.
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#199190 - 11/02/06 12:39 PM
Re: this is my first post
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 10/30/06
Posts: 3812
Loc: Neither here, nor there.
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Quote:
i do not mean to imply that i feel great empathy for the actual performers, (though i sometimes do, when the onscreen situation is particularly nightmarish). i do not blame myself for whatever i might imagine these performers personal situations could be. the guilt is entirely related to me myself and i. why do i need to see these things? what's my problem? of course, your point is an interesting issue, too. it's all a rich tapestry. but right now i only care about my own self .
Ok, I see what you're saying. I dunno man, maybe you're just desensitized to 'regular' porn. After a while, the same old shit get's boring...big titted blonde: gives a bj, gets her pussy eaten, gets fucked, switch a few positions, possibly an anal, then a popshot. You know, like pretty much everything that Vivid's ever put out.
Luckily, we have people like JM Productions, Max Hardcore, hell, even some of the better gonzo guys like Zero Tolerance, that add a little more action into the mix. But asking WHY something turns you on is a little harder to answer.
I don't know why I like seeing bitches throat-fucked, but goddamn it i'll jerk to it.
_________________________
"You know this is XXXPornTalk.com right? You sound like an ADT person. I want to poop on you." -Malice
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#199191 - 11/02/06 01:52 PM
Re: this is my first post
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 07/30/06
Posts: 1712
Loc: at the end of the longest line
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Quote:
Quote:
i do not mean to imply that i feel great empathy for the actual performers, (though i sometimes do, when the onscreen situation is particularly nightmarish). i do not blame myself for whatever i might imagine these performers personal situations could be. the guilt is entirely related to me myself and i. why do i need to see these things? what's my problem? of course, your point is an interesting issue, too. it's all a rich tapestry. but right now i only care about my own self .
Ok, I see what you're saying. I dunno man, maybe you're just desensitized to 'regular' porn. After a while, the same old shit get's boring...big titted blonde: gives a bj, gets her pussy eaten, gets fucked, switch a few positions, possibly an anal, then a popshot. You know, like pretty much everything that Vivid's ever put out.
Luckily, we have people like JM Productions, Max Hardcore, hell, even some of the better gonzo guys like Zero Tolerance, that add a little more action into the mix. But asking WHY something turns you on is a little harder to answer.
I don't know why I like seeing bitches throat-fucked, but goddamn it i'll jerk to it.
I think I another reason people like you a I get off to stuff like this is that we're doing something we think is wrong and others might frown upon. Kinda like when a kid finds his father's or older brother's stash of dirty movies or magazines. Half the fun is knowing you'll get in trouble if your caught, but somehow you always get away with it. It all seems to make the whole experience worth it. Sure, looking at dirty magazines or watching a Vivid or Wicked movie may still be fun when you're old enough to do it and have no parents around to catch you doing it, but the thrill of getting away with something you know you shouldn't be doing is gone. That's why I think people like us turn to harder and more degrading porn as time goes by. We know a lot of other people get pissed off by such things, making it all the more fun for us.
_________________________
Twitter.com/degraderzim
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#199193 - 11/02/06 07:40 PM
Re: this is my first post
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Bukkake Boy
Registered: 08/23/06
Posts: 635
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i think maybe the idea that it is "wrong" has some validity. but if that is the case, why not scat? why must it be abusive-to-the-hoes movies? it is hard to reconcile these likes with how i like to portray myself in the real life. i am a nice guy. aren't i?  why hate?  why not love? 
_________________________
They're all human beings, and though she may be a liar and a manipulator, it's probably because she doesn't know any other way to survive.
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#199194 - 11/02/06 07:50 PM
Re: this is my first post
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Porn Icon
Registered: 01/27/06
Posts: 3440
Loc: Jaundice Town
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the answer lies in the fluffy golden eggs your sister made.
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another issue i'm sure has great ramifications as it relates to mine own personal psychoses. 
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