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Tonight is my last night of sleeping comfortably for a few weeks. It is also possible that this would be my last posting ever as many people never wake up from the surgery I am undergoing tomorrow. I am getting a breast lift, breast augmentation and a tummy tuck all in the same surgery. I will be under for 6 hours and that is a long time to be completely under. At times, to be very honest, I hope I do not wake up. Maybe that is why I opted for this surgery in the first place. Sort of the quiet possibility of not having to deal with my sexual addiction and mental illnesses anymore. I do find it odd that I am not afraid at all. I went to Red Lobster with Nautica and a few friends and came home. I had a great threeway with Nautica and a male friend of ours and now I am writing this blog. I wonder if it possible to will oneself to die while under general anastesia?

I will have Nautica post for me tomorrow night to let you all know how I am doing. If I do not make it, do not mourn me, I will be happier and so will most people that know me.

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