Scenario 1:

Jeff's drunk, has read one too many Phlogiston posts and made a hasty declaration.


Scenario 2:

Jeff's sober, XPT has fallen afoul of the dubious "secondary producer" regulations that had Steph and Drew quaking in their boots, and Jeff would rather kill it than neuter it.
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"If I were a guy, not swallowing would be a deal breaker. So what if you cook and clean? I can get a maid for that." - Gia Jordan