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after being completely owned by Hailey Young, it's not a question of IF ol' Dead Legs will get his heart broken by another pornstar but WHICH pornstar it will be.

here are the candidates:

<FORM METHOD=POST ACTION="http://www.xxxporntalk.com//ubbthreads/dopoll.php"><INPUT TYPE=HIDDEN NAME="pollname" VALUE="1161205442kyoto">
<p>da burglar's future infatuation
<input type="radio" name="option" value="1" />Sasha Grey - thinking she's a naive 18 year old, da burglar will try to dazzle Sasha with his Harvard wit.

<input type="radio" name="option" value="2" />Melissa Lauren - the most dangerous woman in porn. she'd kill a blind 10 year old for fun so destroying a middle-aged gimp's life would be a walk in the park.

<input type="radio" name="option" value="3" />Sierra Sinn - she smokes so much her judgement may be impaired. da burglar tries to cash in on this but Haley Young informs Sierra of his stalkerish ways. Sierra smokes some more then goes to a club leaving da burglar on the sidewalk.

<input type="radio" name="option" value="4" />Gia Jordan - a longshot after da burglar turned on her. however, Gia is female so she's thinking 10 steps ahead. leads da burglar on, gets a couple Gucci purses and meals oout of him, drops him like a load of bad potatos. this ends with da burglar leaving threatening messages on Gia's voicemail.

<input type="radio" name="option" value="5" />Ava Devine- she'll fuck anyone. da burglar goes to pick up Ava for their first date. he walks in on her being gangbanged by the Oakland Raiders.

here's how the coversation will go:

da burglar: Ava, how could you? I love you!

Ava (with a cock in her mouth): whatever.

she proceeds to eat Art Shell's asshole. da burglar rolls into the deep end of a swimmng pool, sinks, and dies.

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I want people to reply with their answers. this poll isn't anonymous

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I want people to reply with their answers. this poll isn't anonymous

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Then why did you put in all that bullshit UBB code, you stupid slant-eyed bacon hater?

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I want people to reply with their answers. this poll isn't anonymous

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Then why did you put in all that bullshit UBB code, you stupid slant-eyed bacon hater?

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This is spam and you are STRONGLY advised not to reply to this or any other posting by "kurtis blow" Please continue to observe this ostracism until notice of his banning or a marked increase in willingness to participate in threads instead of starting ones appropriate for PMs. Feeding him or giving him the attention he craves will cause him to feel comfortable and rip open your trashbags at night-let him learn that he's very boring by himself. Thank you.

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You look a little silly protesting authorship for that, sir.

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You look a little silly protesting authorship for that, sir.

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who gives a shit. it's a porn message board.

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Don't worry, sir. They won't think that you am me and vice versal.

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I want people to reply with their answers. this poll isn't anonymous

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Then why did you put in all that bullshit UBB code, you stupid slant-eyed bacon hater?

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This is spam and you are STRONGLY advised not to reply to this or any other posting by "kurtis blow" Please continue to observe this ostracism until notice of his banning or a marked increase in willingness to participate in threads instead of starting ones appropriate for PMs. Feeding him or giving him the attention he craves will cause him to feel comfortable and rip open your trashbags at night-let him learn that he's very boring by himself. Thank you.

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I think BIFF originally wrote it.

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I hope this nigga Da Burg finally donated himself to a fuckin scrap metal yard. What a waste of fuckin tin.

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Da burg is cool, mainly because I got a PM from Mia Rose asking if I could get da burg to stop sending her pms to see if she'd sleep with him next time hes in la.

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I mean, I never stalked Hailey Young, not even close...if anything I tried to distance myself on a number of occassions to get away from her...and NOW look, she is willing to fuck the general male population in her Fan Bang promotion as long as they show up with a aim test. Its laughable...chicks willing to allow ANY penis inside them who might actually claim to be stalked, lol.

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Of course, following this line of argument to its inevitable conclusion means that porn girls cannot be stalked per se (and therefore not complain about being stalked) because of the nature of the work they do.

Ergo, if we embrace this DaBurglarism, then we owe an apology to the likes of Sportswami and AC Cream. Unsurprisingly, the rational mind will immediately reject such a foolhardy notion. Hence I'm calling it for the bullshit it so obviously is.

DaBurg, you are starting to worry me...please don't become the AC Cream/ADT Watch Guy of XPT. You're better than that.

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Both Mia and Ava are slumin out with Fayner. Seriously distressing.
why?

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I mean, I never stalked Hailey Young, not even close...if anything I tried to distance myself on a number of occassions to get away from her...and NOW look, she is willing to fuck the general male population in her Fan Bang promotion as long as they show up with a aim test. Its laughable...chicks willing to allow ANY penis inside them who might actually claim to be stalked, lol.

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Of course, following this line of argument to its inevitable conclusion means that porn girls cannot be stalked per se (and therefore not complain about being stalked) because of the nature of the work they do.

Ergo, if we embrace this DaBurglarism, then we owe an apology to the likes of Sportswami and AC Cream. Unsurprisingly, the rational mind will immediately reject such a foolhardy notion. Hence I'm calling it for the bullshit it so obviously is.

DaBurg, you are starting to worry me...please don't become the AC Cream/ADT Watch Guy of XPT. You're better than that.

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Ah dude, thats not what I meant and you know it....but whatever, I have no intention of enduring anymore of this. From now on I am documenting everything, and will NOT have anything to do with active female performers in Porn without eyewitnesses or some form of record keeping to clearly show just who/what/where is going on....

Which is to say that if Mia ever wants to go see a baseball game with me, there will now be one male and one female chaperones, each with security clearance, weapons permits and perfect credit/background checks.

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...I have no intention of enduring anymore of this. From now on I am documenting everything, and will NOT have anything to do with active female performers in Porn without eyewitnesses or some form of record keeping to clearly show just who/what/where is going on....
...

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Da burg is cool, mainly because I got a PM from Mia Rose asking if I could get da burg to stop sending her pms to see if she'd sleep with him next time hes in la.

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Christ,this is ridiculous, she thinks I am STALKING her now?

This is really interesting, there was a time she liked me and getting funny PMs from me, I wonder what changed? I hadnt talk to her in months before I sent her a couple messages the other day. Either she was poisoned against me by another disgruntled whore, or she never liked me to begin with and was just using me .... I feel used.

If anyone has been stalked its ME! I mean, I never stalked Hailey Young, not even close...if anything I tried to distance myself on a number of occassions to get away from her...and NOW look, she is willing to fuck the general male population in her Fan Bang promotion as long as they show up with a aim test. Its laughable...chicks willing to allow ANY penis inside them who might actually claim to be stalked, lol.

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DaBurg, why don't you stalk me? I feel so left out.

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DaBurg, why don't you stalk me? I feel so left out.

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Da burg is cool, mainly because I got a PM from Mia Rose asking if I could get da burg to stop sending her pms to see if she'd sleep with him next time hes in la.

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Christ,this is ridiculous, she thinks I am STALKING her now?

This is really interesting, there was a time she liked me and getting funny PMs from me, I wonder what changed? I hadnt talk to her in months before I sent her a couple messages the other day. Either she was poisoned against me by another disgruntled whore, or she never liked me to begin with and was just using me .... I feel used.

If anyone has been stalked its ME! I mean, I never stalked Hailey Young, not even close...if anything I tried to distance myself on a number of occassions to get away from her...and NOW look, she is willing to fuck the general male population in her Fan Bang promotion as long as they show up with a aim test. Its laughable...chicks willing to allow ANY penis inside them who might actually claim to be stalked, lol.

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I mean, I never stalked Hailey Young, not even close...if anything I tried to distance myself on a number of occassions to get away from her...and NOW look, she is willing to fuck the general male population in her Fan Bang promotion as long as they show up with a aim test. Its laughable...chicks willing to allow ANY penis inside them who might actually claim to be stalked, lol.

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Of course, following this line of argument to its inevitable conclusion means that porn girls cannot be stalked per se (and therefore not complain about being stalked) because of the nature of the work they do.

Ergo, if we embrace this DaBurglarism, then we owe an apology to the likes of Sportswami and AC Cream. Unsurprisingly, the rational mind will immediately reject such a foolhardy notion. Hence I'm calling it for the bullshit it so obviously is.

DaBurg, you are starting to worry me...please don't become the AC Cream/ADT Watch Guy of XPT. You're better than that.

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Be patient, this will be my longest post so far and I finaly have something to say that might make some sense...or at least start an argument.

A few years back Ashley was working the JM booth in Vegas when a "fan" asked for a photo. She came out from around the podium or whatever she was hiding behind (hence the full-surround counter the past two years) to stand next to the guy and while posing for the shot he got a digit or two up her tailpipe. Ashley ended up crying and hiding under something for most of the day-at least this is how I heard and retold the story.

AND THEN; A friend to whom I told this story came up with an interesting take on it along the same lines of the above argument that whores can't be stalked because of the nature of their work. My friend said it was ridiculous that Ashley would be upset, or that anyone would think she had been violated in any way. "How could you think that?" I asked. "Well, if you saw (insert famous wide reciever, outfielder etc here) walking across a parking lot and you tossed them a ball, would you consider that assault?" asked my friend.
And I got give him this one.

IF YOU CHOOSE TO CHUG SEMEN TO PAY THE BILLS, THEN DON'T BE SURPRISED IF SOMEONE WALKS UP AND DUMPS A LOAD ON YOUR TONGUE! It's no different than seeing your local Little League coach and yelling "hey, fly ball" while you toss one across the field to him.

Live with your life choices and don't complain when the world takes as the "real you" what you pretend to be on film. It just doesn't get through to most people that you only play a whore on film, not in real life!
(I , of course, would ask to play through, or yell four or in some way make known my intensions before slipping a greased knuckle up Ori's shitter. But then I actually conduct myself with a certain degree of decorum around whores).

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Da burg is cool, mainly because I got a PM from Mia Rose asking if I could get da burg to stop sending her pms to see if she'd sleep with him next time hes in la.

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Christ,this is ridiculous, she thinks I am STALKING her now?

This is really interesting, there was a time she liked me and getting funny PMs from me, I wonder what changed? I hadnt talk to her in months before I sent her a couple messages the other day. Either she was poisoned against me by another disgruntled whore, or she never liked me to begin with and was just using me .... I feel used.

If anyone has been stalked its ME! I mean, I never stalked Hailey Young, not even close...if anything I tried to distance myself on a number of occassions to get away from her...and NOW look, she is willing to fuck the general male population in her Fan Bang promotion as long as they show up with a aim test. Its laughable...chicks willing to allow ANY penis inside them who might actually claim to be stalked, lol.

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DaBurg, why don't you stalk me? I feel so left out.

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Quit begging Holly! You should know by now that you are the favorite of many of us on here. You even go so far as to constantly taunt us with declarations of how you'll never take it on film while at the same time posting tales of hiring hookers for you and one of your many still-friends-with ex's.
No one will ever top the "green bean" photo for pure tantilizing sex appeal when we all know so much about what a freak you can be on the horizontal.
So, stop courting stalkers! If I lived anywhere near L.A. I spend my weekend nights across the street in a panel van just waiting for my chance. (You do date guys with vans, right?)

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Be patient, this will be my longest post so far and I finaly have something to say that might make some sense...or at least start an argument.

A few years back Ashley was working the JM booth in Vegas when a "fan" asked for a photo. She came out from around the podium or whatever she was hiding behind (hence the full-surround counter the past two years) to stand next to the guy and while posing for the shot he got a digit or two up her tailpipe. Ashley ended up crying and hiding under something for most of the day-at least this is how I heard and retold the story.

AND THEN; A friend to whom I told this story came up with an interesting take on it along the same lines of the above argument that whores can't be stalked because of the nature of their work. My friend said it was ridiculous that Ashley would be upset, or that anyone would think she had been violated in any way. "How could you think that?" I asked. "Well, if you saw (insert famous wide reciever, outfielder etc here) walking across a parking lot and you tossed them a ball, would you consider that assault?" asked my friend.
And I got give him this one.

IF YOU CHOOSE TO CHUG SEMEN TO PAY THE BILLS, THEN DON'T BE SURPRISED IF SOMEONE WALKS UP AND DUMPS A LOAD ON YOUR TONGUE! It's no different than seeing your local Little League coach and yelling "hey, fly ball" while you toss one across the field to him.

Live with your life choices and don't complain when the world takes as the "real you" what you pretend to be on film. It just doesn't get through to most people that you only play a whore on film, not in real life!
(I , of course, would ask to play through, or yell four or in some way make known my intensions before slipping a greased knuckle up Ori's shitter. But then I actually conduct myself with a certain degree of decorum around whores).

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As arguments go, that's pretty groundless...if I see someone who's in the armed forces walking down the street, can I put a bullet between their eyes? After all, if they choose to do a job where they get shot at, then they can't have any complaints when someone shoots at them off duty, right?

What if I see a stunt performer walking down the street? Can I veer off the road and plough into him with my car, sending him flying over the hood and into the windscreen? Those guys do that kind of shit all the time, you know?

Hey, if I see a pro wrestler walking around the mall, do you think it's okay if I run up behind him and cold-cock him with a steel chair or trashcan? Happens all the time in his day job, so he shouldn't mind, right?

Whichever lowlife did that to Ashley was just plain wrong, it's indefensible. I sincerely hope said idiot was swiftly escorted outside and had had a few things (like, say, a size 11 boot) forcibly inserted into his rectum repeatedly, until he wept like a first-time prison bitch.

There are simply no excuse for taking liberties like that, and your friend is a moron to think otherwise, just like DaBurg. I don't want to come off sounding like Captain Save-A-Ho here, but you've seriously got to learn to draw the line between real life and fiction.

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Hey, if I see a pro wrestler walking around the mall, do you think it's okay if I run up behind him and cold-cock him with a steel chair or trashcan? Happens all the time in his day job, so he shouldn't mind, right?

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DaBurg, why don't you stalk me? I feel so left out.

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You have no fucking idea what you just brought upon yourself, my beautiful little chickadee. Bathe in garlic, buy a rosary and upgrade your home-security unit if you know what's good for you.

One of the best/worst things about Burg is that he thinks there's some vast conspiracy afoot, like everyone is following the lead of some mastermind with a vendetta and too much time on his or her hands. Burg, seriously, if, let's say, Bornyo or Floofin pulled what you pull/pulled, they would no doubt receive as much guff as you do. No one is conspiring, wheeled-one. The Hailey Young fiasco, blabbing to Luke about Gia's private life, and now this Mia Rose thing... Face the facts and accept what most everyone here already has -- you've become a creep. And unfortunately for you, a Harvard education and a little bit of money cannot change that.

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A few years back Ashley was working the JM booth in Vegas when a "fan" asked for a photo. She came out from around the podium or whatever she was hiding behind (hence the full-surround counter the past two years) to stand next to the guy and while posing for the shot he got a digit or two up her tailpipe. Ashley ended up crying and hiding under something for most of the day-at least this is how I heard and retold the story.

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you couldn't make these people's backgrounds up, it's great that they came to hate each other.

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Or maybe it's Sisyphus.

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kyoto was at this show, it could have been him.

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you couldn't make these people's backgrounds up, it's great that they came to hate each other.

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Spot-on.

I think I understand Kyoto's motivation but I still don't get Burgs. Maybe it's the wheelchair but he just reminds me of the energizer bunny- he just keeps going and going and going.

Or maybe it's Sisyphus.

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+1 After the equivalent of 6 years of Latin, I have forgotten more mythology than I remember. Sisyphus always struck a chord in me, the "rolling" up a hill is figurative in several ways in my life.

Still, these posts by Bornyo and James are evidence as to why I am putting them in my will. They treat me like the dysfunctional brother of the family whom they know, deep deep down, is really an inspired genius who is worn out from the struggle of life. I havent figured out what to leave them yet....

If only Willie would renounce his catholicism, I'd leave him 3% of a brewery

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you couldn't make these people's backgrounds up, it's great that they came to hate each other.

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Spot-on.

I think I understand Kyoto's motivation but I still don't get Burgs. Maybe it's the wheelchair but he just reminds me of the energizer bunny- he just keeps going and going and going.

Or maybe it's Sisyphus.

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+1 After the equivalent of 6 years of Latin, I have forgotten more mythology than I remember. Sisyphus always struck a chord in me, the "rolling" up a hill is figurative in several ways in my life.

Still, these posts by Bornyo and James are evidence as to why I am putting them in my will. They treat me like the dysfunctional brother of the family whom they know, deep deep down, is really an inspired genius who is worn out from the struggle of life. I havent figured out what to leave them yet....

If only Willie would renounce his catholicism, I'd leave him 3% of a brewery

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SNAP OUT OF IT!!!!
This is the cage for christ sake!
FUCK YOU AND YOU AND YOU AND YOU AND FUCK YOU MOST OF ALL!