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As a necessary primer, I have very limited gardening experience and feel somewhat fullish seeking your help under such absurd circumstances.

I recently moved from New York City to suburban Western Pennsylvania, and purchased a home with my first lawn. It was incredibly exciting for my wife and I, having both been raised in a city with so little available green space.

My wife, having recently birthed triplets (we now have eight children), enlisted me to build our first garden. I eagerly embarked on this mission, often forgoing my weekly Church meetings and self-defense classes; travelling instead to the Carnegie library to research garden and flower design. Indeed, it was crucial that my wife enjoy our first garden, and the garden quickly developed into a manifestation of my love for her and my new children. Ultimately, I decided upon a faith-based theme; which intermixed my wife's name, Mary Anne, into a new-age floral crucifixion depiction. I realize for many this may seem weird, but for my family, it just worked. It was beautiful.

In any case, here is where the story gets weird:

In my increasinly frequent trips to Home Depot, I encountered a friendly Ecuadorian man, Pablo, who offered some kind and very helpful insight as to the direction of my family's backyard. I initially believed Pablo to be an employee of Home Depot, but upon learning he was a homeless man- spending his nights in a dumpster in the neighboring alley- I decided to put him to use. In exchange for ONLY a weekly regiment of Jim Beam, chewing gum, cigarettes and some old clothing, Pablo assisted me in the planting of these flowers, and the winter maintaince of my backyard.

The agreement worked very well- with the exception of when we founded a very drunken Pablo sifting through our garbarge for food- and the garden was, seemingly, a success.

However, last week my oldest son and I were diagnosed with Herpes Complex B. We were the only two to eat tomatoes from the garden. Given Pablo's poor hygeine, my congregation choir leader, who attended two years of medical school, has hypothesized that Pablo's poor hygeine spread Herpes onto the produce in my garden. In suppose I now know the origen of the open sores which infested his hands and face.

Four Important Questions:

(1) Must I destroy my garden?

(2) How do I innoculate the garden? Must I do something as primitive as SLASH and Burn?

(3) Are the animals which feed in my garden in danger?

(4) Do I have any legal recourses here? I know Pablo does not have much, but can I hold him liable for my son and my medical treatment?

Thank you.

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my wife's name, Mary Anne, into a new-age floral crucifixion depiction. I realize for many this may seem weird, but for my family, it just worked. It was beautiful.

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I suppose it's possible that herpes could be transmitted through vegetables, but I'd be surprised.

As far as legal recourses go, you could certainly try suing a homeless man to recover medical costs, but remember that he's homeless and probably doesn't have a lot of assets.

Also, remember that you didn't pay him a wage that would be considered a legal wage, so the end result would probably be that the Department of Labor, Wages and Hours Division would make you pay him back wages and also fine you. If you pay promptly, you'll probably avoid jailtime.

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