Ten things I've learned since joining XPT one year ago.

1. Nine out of ten whores say they are in porn for the "great sex" and "close friendships," when in reality they are motivated in the following order of importance:

--80% money/Donna Karan sunglasses/Gucci handbags
--10% support/augment drug dependency
--10% support suitcase pimp's drug dependency

2. When a whore says they "don't do drugs any more," it means they still smoke unbelievable amounts of pot, and like fishes.

3. Not all attention whores are porn girls, but all porn girls are attention whores.

4. Porn needs to regain some of its danger. The various means of accessing porn, along with the misguided wishes of the business to legitimise itself, are removing the danger of watching (and buying) porn, and killing its profitability at the same time.

5. While the leaders of ADT like to think they are current and topical, only XPT users were able to get through to Lord Master Damien personally and get live quotes for his various sex acts.

6. XPT is the internet leader in the use of the following words: herpes, gag, degenerate, dead inside, douchebag, and douchebag (see what I mean?)

7. Never, ever pick a stick fight with have2cit. No matter how right you are, you won't win. In a prior life h2c was in the IRA.

8. It's better for a whore to be honest about her shortcomings than have someone called the Smelly Monkey find it out--the beatdown will be twice as bad. Smelly Monkey is the hydrogen peroxide to the bloody wound of porn: effervescent, stinging, and cleansing.

9. Porn people say they don't check XPT out, yet everyone seems to know what is going on here. XPT is the guilty pleasure of porn. You folks love to read XPT and vicariously vent your frustration and anger. You love us. You are welcome.

10. Whores lie.