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1) You know in the movie Better Off Dead from back in 1985 with John Cusack? Yeah, it was a good one. Well it was on last night and I made Taylor watch the part where the hamburger comes to life and starts playing an Eddie Van Halen guitar and singing along to "Everybody Wants Some!" She didn't get it. I explained that when I was a kid I saw the movie like 50 times just because of that scene. A lot of VH fans did.

But it made me laugh seeing it all these years later as an adult.

2) There is a rule in the house I live in which I made and follow 100%. Whenever a hard-boiled egg is eaten, the shell must be cracked on Bandit's skull beforehand. Not a hard knock, but a little tap on his head is all it takes. Otherwise, he doesn't get any of it.

Taylor knew that I lived by this rule, and snuck in a raw egg into the bowl of hard-boiled ones. Then she waited. And waited.

A whole day later I cracked a raw egg off Bandit's skull. It was a mess.

Now Bandit is afraid of eggs.

"Look what you did!" Taylor yelled at me. "Now my pit bull is afraid of fucking eggs!"

That too makes me laugh.

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