The only thing I'd need to gag Kami with would be large grocers bag from any locatable Albertsons.

I don't know though...

Could girls use 'I was molested by a large grocers bag from Albertson's' as an excuse for becoming infested with STD's and addictive drugs?

Maybe.

"I was molested by an Albertson's bag when I was a child, therefore, all my recent stupidities should be absolved."

Hmm.

I guess that might work on Oprah.

And as we all know...

Even though Oprah has never been married, or had children...

...she is the supreme source of worthwhile information for thousands of porn whores...isn't she?

I wonder if Oprah masterbates about the dude she was fucking when she was 14.

I bet she does.

And I bet that douchbag excuse for a man she says she dates has absolutely no idea.

Food for thought.

The Outsider