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homosexual = "same sexual"
heterosexual = "different sexual"

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In Belladonna's recently released 'cock happy', he not only gets fingered by her, but he also licks his own cum off her mouth. Movies with activities such as these should come with a clear warning, so normal people like me can easily identify them, and thus ignore them.

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It does...it's the little logo saying 'Evil Angel' or 'Evil Empire' on it that lets you know you're going to tranny-town or thereabouts. Why do you think this smiley is called 'Nacho'?>

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Wankus said, "Someone in the chatroom wrote that finally you have a doll that has an asshole bigger than Kurt Lockwood's."

Faith then told a story about how she used to bang Lockwood in the ass.

"This is really funny- he'd be, like, do it easy. Do it easy- like, when I was putting the dildo in? In my mind, I'm, like, okay, buddy. Who are you fooling? And then he'd be five minutes later, that's all you got? That's all you got? Yeah, that's all I got. It's a dildo, motherfucker! I don't have a cock. I can't get it any harder and I didn't go buy any bigger dildos."

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homosexual = "same sexual"
heterosexual = "different sexual"

Capish????

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Wankus said, "Someone in the chatroom wrote that finally you have a doll that has an asshole bigger than Kurt Lockwood's."

Faith then told a story about how she used to bang Lockwood in the ass.

"This is really funny- he'd be, like, do it easy. Do it easy- like, when I was putting the dildo in? In my mind, I'm, like, okay, buddy. Who are you fooling? And then he'd be five minutes later, that's all you got? That's all you got? Yeah, that's all I got. It's a dildo, motherfucker! I don't have a cock. I can't get it any harder and I didn't go buy any bigger dildos."

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Gram Ponante writes on www.gramponante.com: The Decline of Western Civilization Part 69: The Porno Years

Studio: Sex Z Pictures

Director: Kurt Lockwood

Cast: Lockwood, Samantha Ryan, Monica Mayhem, Eve Mayfair, Alektra Blue, Venus, Naudia Nyce, Eve Lawrence, Charlie Lane, Alexis Amore, Ron Jeremy

Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot

Interviewer: Back in the 80's there was a big movement in music.

Kurt Lockwood: Yeah.

Interviewer: Now there's a big movement in porn. How do you compare the two?

Kurt Lockwood: I came out to be a rock star. Didn't quite make it. But porn is a good consolation prize. I still get a lot of pussy.

Let's say Oskar Schindler himself took over for Liam Neeson in "Schindler's List", and also directed the movie. That is what "The Decline of Western Civilization Part 69: The Porno Years" is like: a great movie about a fascinating subject (Lockwood), except that this viewer couuldn't shake the uncomfortable knowledge that Lockwood made the movie about himself.

If this movie were a documentary about Lockwood and his exploits commissioned by someone else (like the BBC), or even if it was revealed that Lockwood had paid someone to make a documentary about him, the uncomfortable feeling would go away. As it is, the thrilling feeling that we are watching what Lockwood wants us to know about him pervades the movie.

For example, in the beginning of the film we are treated to a music video of Lockwood's song "Strip". Lyrics are included so the viewer can sing along.

She razzle dazzle...She rock 'n' roller...She superhero...She holy roller

It is, unfortunately, clear why Lockwood did not make it as a rock star. That he is fantastic in his consolation prize should be the theme of this movie. Instead, interstitial shots of sex as only a person who has a lot of it can conceive (with women one wants to have sex with again and again), are mixed with just the type of tiresome noodling one expects from the cute guy who thinks it would be a good idea to get a band together.

We watch Monica Mayhem fuck Samantha Ryan with a strap-on while Lockwood, getting his ass eaten by Ryan, jerks off on her stomach.

Who needs the rock music?

The movie is, like the Penelope Spheeris movies it seeks to emulate, all over the place. The high points are the sex and the interview segments, the former no-nonsense, fast, and visually arresting and the latter frank, informative, and competently edited and shot. Attempts at humor by people playing characters ("Reverend Brimstone") fail.

But the simple truths revealed in the movie (Eve Lawrence - who has since left the adult business - : "I'm cute and I'm smart and I make a shitload of money") or Lockwood's observation that it's not the porn stars who are buying porn movies - it's all of us - really make this porn movie into an effective document.

"In the future, there will be no difference between mainstream celebrities and porn stars," Lockwood says after the big orgy at the Roosevelt Hotel, an orgy that in itself should be a How To Have an Orgy movie.

Of course the statement isn't true. As close the worlds of porn and mainstream come to each other, one will never be confused with the other, only compared when it is convenient, like an Abercrombie & Fitch catalog. Lockwood really wants to believe otherwise.

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Since you've brought it up, CJ, anyone know where Bishop is to take umbrage in Lockwood's stead? Has he been gaffled again by Five-O, does a brother need bail money? I'm just lookin' out for the good guys, I guess.

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