I never asked my ex-wife that question, how many dudes she'd been with, frankly I didn't care and didn't feel I had room to judge her, I have a very sordid past.

I honestly don't know how many women I've had sex with, when I was 13 I went to an AlaTeen Convention in Ohio (Alateen is for the Children of Alcoholic Parents) and although there was adult supervision, they had to sleep sometime. My first encounter where a young lady caused me to orgasm was at the Alateen convention, I had ended up in a room in the middle of the night with three curious young ladies. I know one of the Girls was 15 and another was 13, one of them put hickeys on my ass cheeks, my sister saw them and I had the nickname "Hickey Butt" for about three years.

When I was 14 I was going out with a rich girl, I was the Poor White Trash from the wrong side of the tracks she was using to make her daddy angry (I do believe daddy was Mafia.)

I wasn't concerned about him killing me because his daughter liked to ride me like the horse he'd bought her, but one day when I went to visit her, she wasn't home, he wasn't home, but his second trophy wife was.

I was a "well growed child" to steal a line from "Little Big Man" who was already working on my Grandpa's farm taking care of horses and such, I also did some construction work, roofing and road building.

At 17 I ran into Mona Page who was a late 70's Early 80's Porn Star who was on a dancing Tour with Vanessa Del Rio, I was playing pool one night at a strip joint. Ah what a weekend. I also got asked to "Dance" for a bachelorette Party of at the Older Sisters of a Girl I had Dated.

I noticed that the Girls talked to each other and when one girl would dump me for some reason or another it wasn't long before one of her friends was rubbing up against me.

I also had dated an Irish Girl who's family was fresh off the boat and started a little cafe in my home town. Man could she talk dirty, I can't hear a girl speak with an Irish lilt without getting a woody. The Restaurant didn't do well her family closed up shop and moved off.

I joined the Service "Air Farce" in 1982, my tech school was in Biloxi Mississippi and it seemed to be sort of like a college campus, there weren't a bevy of females, but they seemed interested in experimenting.

My first Assignment was Montana, I hung out with a Puerto Rican Golden Gloves Champ who had a friend, they were like the Guys from "A Night At the Roxbury" but they had so many Montana Chicks hitting on them I often got some fairly hot looking cast offs.

I went TDY to Florida where I played games with the Special Operations guys, jumped out of a perfectly good airplane,got hit by another guy on the way down and spent three months in the hospital. I had an assignment to Shemya already but they gave me my choice of Assignment after Shemya, I took the Philippines.

I was in the Philippines for almost five years, the first six months I was trying to get back into shape after my injuries, but one day while running the perimeter of Clark I saw an old fat dude with about four LBFMs. I figured the girls didn't care what kind of shape I was in, I went astray.

Boy did I ever go astray. I figure I had one girl every day for three years, it could be more. One day another guy and myself went to find the girl who gave the best head in Angeles City. There was a street we called "Blow Row" because it has Blow-Job Bars. The girls all gave head, they had a menu, Ice Job, Chocolate Job, Toothpast Job, Hot Job (the girl took a drink of hot coffee or tea and held it in her mouth which warmed her mouth more as she went down on you) I know we went to at least three different bars, I figure on average 15 girls at each place.

The most I had in my bed at once was seven. While I was in the Philippines the New Peoples Army (NPA) shot three guys, I was living off base at the time and we weren't allowed to go downtown, but that didn't stop the girls from comming to my house. Other guys who lived in the same neighborhood as me would sneak over and we'd have parties and lots of girls would show up. While I was in the Philippines I ran into an Austrailian girl (looked like a thinner Torey Lane) who was angry when she found out her husband who owned a fishing boat was spending three months in the P.I. playing with LBFMs when he was supposed to be fishing. She came to Angeles City looking to get revenge. She worked in Superhead for a week. I wouldn't say we were dating, we hung out a lot. She'd often take me and find an LBFM (Little Brown Fucking Machine) the LBFM would be riding me like I was Seabiscuit and the Ozzie Chick would be slathering my balls. I'd blow a nut up in the LBFM and she'd suck it out. She was a freak and a little scary. Towards the last year I met an American Girl in the Air Force. I guess she wasn't used to guys not offering her everything she wanted so she reacted badly. I'm not saying I had the worst reputation in the P.I but I was fairly well known for my antics. She went bar hopping with me one night and when I got drunk she took me back to my place and blew me in the cab. Big Titted Red Haired Girl who pretty much did whatever I wanted. I still lived off base and LBFMs would come by and Ginger didn't have a problem sending them in to wake me.

Alas I got orders to Germany.

Ah Germany, you go into a Gas Station and the GGG Videos are right out for everyone to see. They have different attitudes in Germany. I also think that most of the Chicks have a perception that if you're from the U.S. you're from L.A. or New York. I didn't have the heart to tell them I was from Detroit, I didn't want to scare them. While I was in Germany they took the Berlin Wall down and many Eastern European Girls flooded into West Germany. One night I turned around in a Club and this Russian Girl put her tits in my hands, she took me back to her apartment where there were other Russian Girls.

Shortly before I left Germany I met a Girl in the English Army (BEF) and she was from Liverpool, I couldn't understand a thing she said, but my God this Girl was a Race Horse in the sack. I can't say she was Goth, it was more Punk Rock, she had her black hair cut so it was about an inch long all over and wore those belly shirts, a plaid skirt, linesman's boots and had about a half dozen piercings and black lipstick and eyeliner. She was bi and living with another girl who wasn't there often, but when she was she shared our bed.

Then I got orders to Colorado, before then I got sent TDY to Biloxi again, I didn't know this girl who took up with me for this TDY was married, I met her at a barbecue and she just sort of hung onto me and we had lots of Sex!

After the TDY I went home on leave, I had been having a Pen-Pal Relationship with a Girl from My Hometown since about 1986 (while I was in the P.I.) When I got home she followed me around, did pretty much whatever I asked her to do, fed me bathed me, acted like I hung the moon. After I got to Colorado she reported she was Pregnant. I took leave again and we got Married (I thought it was love)

She asked me one night after we had been married about four years, I made a big mistake, I TOLD THE TRUTH, I said I didn't rightly know, but guessed about 1500.

I don't think that my number is that Special, I bet there are any number of guys who had longer tours in the P.I. who racked up a tally sheet larger than Mine, I hung out with some of them.

After the Philippines I was in Germany, the Right Place at the Right Time to have Eastern European chicks throwing themselves at you, plus I was American.

I think it's more impressive that I've been to every Continent but Antartica (on my list of things to do.)

I'm not trying to brag, if you think I am consider this.

I was married about a weekk short of 13 years, the first three years the wife and I had sex about two or three times a week. After my son was born I was lucky if it was once in six months.

She stopped having sex with me entirely about a year before the divorce and it's been two years since.

I'd easily give up 1490 of them conquests for someone to rub up against on a regular basis, who seemed to actually like me.

And if you don't count blow-jobs we can knock the number down to 500 or 700, I couldn't rightly say.

wow, you sure like to type.

Words,words,words.

Quote:

---

It's sports Radio or Porn Message Boards.

---

Hey, that reminds me...anyone seen Swami?

I hogtied Swami and roasted him with five apples in his mouth and asshole (yes he's that big). Then pissed on him for great flavor after eating a pound of bacon. Bacon flavor piss is an additive used like basting, an alternative for results like smoked meat. I couldn't help but over cook him to jerky... it easied my 2% soul, 98% uterine rejected mass of flesh matter. The more burn, the more pleasure. He didn't think I had long legs after the roasting. I wonder why. Oh, yea... duh... cuz he was dead.

Five in each. Why waste pepper and succulent pineapple on that slab?

Bad_bad = DaBurg

spare us from the novel, this isn't ADT.

How Many what? words? man i dont know i had to suicide after the first paragraph and a half. My guess would be a good deal of them.

in fact here is a UTUBE !

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qYTA964x28&search=missing%20persons

A little long winded, but congratulations on remembering something from the P.I. My first visit to Thailand is more of a blur.