you don't let kids throw curveballs and you don't let kids run long distances before their growth plates settle down in their mid-teens. a triathalon is a ridiculously stupid thing to do to your child.
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"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"

Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits