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I love this picture because you can totally see that Wankus is thinking "What has happened to my life?"

I mean, don't you think it kills you inside to listen to your girl answer the "what's your favorite position" question for the 1 million time, all-the-while wondering if that funny taste in your mouth after the last time you kissed her was Kurt Lockwood's cum?



The real tragedy reflected in that 1000yard stare is the dawning realization that his life peaked somewhere between a high school shop class and a frathouse kegger... and that his principle bragging rights since then are boning a mummified neverwas and having Optimus Prime on speed-dial.
Meanwhile, the selfconsciously conspicuous obsession with the Dolphins, pencilthin fu manchu, George Michaelesque 5 o'clock shadow, and moss crewneck, make me think the savory aftertaste of Lockwood's nut is the highlight of a typical week.

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...And say what you want about this guy, but he's the best thing on LOST.

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"We had part of a Slinky - but I straightened it."