I had a very strange dream today. I was in bed and there was a Japanese girl sitting at the foot of my bed. She was a translator with very dark eyes. In the living room, there was a Japanese male pop-star. I asked her "How do I get him a taxi" and she said "I can translate it for you."

I woke up and was heading to tell him I could get him a taxi when I heard the gate opening. I looked outside and saw 2 men from Laos being dropped at my house. Immediately they got out of the car they lit 2 big cigars. Then the car left and they walked up to my front door. I opened the door a little bit and said "Yes?" and the first guy, in very broken English said, "I took naked pictures." I said "Okay?" and he said "I left them on the kitchen." I then asked him "What do you want?" and he said "I will come back later."

I turned around and the Japanese girl was standing behind me smiling.
When I woke up my girlfriend had left with her sister (probably to someones house or just cursing around). I went downstairs to make sure I didn't leave the Japanese porn I was watching last night in the DVD player. Then I walked into the kitchen and poured myself some lemonade my intern's mom made for me. I then made a bunch of screencaps on my computer-machine and did a review of another Japanese porn.

Afterwards I got a call from my girlfriend asking me what I was going to do later, how I didn't hear them leave and whether I was going anywhere later today. I said no to almost everything then told her I was going to make a sandwich at lunch. She said "Okay, we might be home by then.." then she said something else, but I didn't really make out what she said.

I then got a call from Wasted. We talked for about an hour, sometimes about this guy called Karim from Canada, and again we talked about Eli Roth bitching about negative reviews. Then Wasted laughed like it was the fifth and I told him how once i told a Chicken sandwich that it's breasts were a bit too tough, and it gave me food poisoning, then we said goodbye and I went into the kitchen.

I started with several cans of imported Italian tuna which had been preserved in extra virgin olive oil, quite the tasty concoctive of preservatives, not like those disgusting chemicals they put in those other food atrocities. I took those several cans, removed the extra virgin olive oil (for the most part), and fluffed it in a large bowl, once the tuna was nice and fluffy, I diced some green onions, chives, and green and red peppers. Once they were chopped into nice small pieces, I put them in the mix with the tuna, and added a careful amount of mayonnaise, can't be too careful with that stuff, its not very good for you i hear, lots of fat.

Next came the bun. I took a perfectly crafted loaf of French bread that i picked up from the local deli/bakery and sliced it lengthwise in half, and then once in the middle - separating it to 4 parts. I then placed it on my oven rack face down, setting the oven to a low temperature, in order to toast these quite large pieces of bread. I then continued with the main topping of the sandwich. After letting the tuna mixture cool in the refrigerator for a few minutes, I added in a select amount of salt and pepper, with some extra, super secret ingredients to go with it. I then placed that in the refrigerator while my loaf was toasting in the oven.

I got another call right here from the girlfriend, this time she told me she ran into someone and I barked at her "You seriously called me to tell me you ran into SBK?" Sbk is this dude we both know (actually I know him and shes just a fan of our mutual friendship) and we went back and forth for a bit before hanging up.

I finally removed my sandwich from the oven, and removed the bowl of tuna mixture from the refrigerator. I spread the tuna mixture along the loaves, and added more pepper and spices over it. After that, I proceeded to spread slices of cucumber which I had sliced while the loaves were toasting along the sandwich, covering almost all of the tuna mixture. I sealed the deal by placing fresh alfalfa sprouts over the cucumbers, picking up a fresh can of coca-cola, and headed to my computer machine, where i proceeded to communicate with Sparky via the putty thing VPN style. He told me how he was laying some "phat" beats and 'phresch' breaks on top of some 'wicked-bad' leads and 'booty thumpin' basslines. .