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#157662 - 04/05/06 02:19 PM
Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 06/15/04
Posts: 68
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Monday, I have to attend a party for "the girls of Playboy TV" edition of Playboy magazine in Atlanta, GA. These are the requirements for hygene that were emailed to me and all of the models.
Grooming Outline for Playboy TV Talent
All talent is representing Playboy and Spice. Playboy is a universal brand representing the most beautiful women in the world. We hope you take the time to follow the guidelines provided for you. All talent will be reviewed and if it is found inappropriate individuals may be asked to modify their make up and/or dress.
HAIR
Freshly washed, colored and styled.
NAILS
Toes and fingers should be filed, clean with fresh polish
For the purpose of the party a French manicure or Red polish only.
MAKE UP
Talent is considered to be celebrities so make up should be classic and applied with consideration of time of day and lighting. No Goth or punk, please.
Talent should be camera ready.
SHOES
Shoes should be comfortable and sexy but appropriate to the outfit. Please bring an extra pair in case feet begin to hurt. NO BARE FEET WILL BE ALLOWED.
PROPER HYGENE
Please cover any bruises with body makeup. Panty hose are allowed to enhance look of legs.
Shower before hand and clean face and skin and wear deodorant.
All talent should have emergency make up, an extra pair of hosiery (if wearing them), extra shoes, and feminine needs.
_________________________
hello scott lyons here i want to give a heart felt FUCKU to most of u - Scott Lyons
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#157663 - 04/05/06 02:44 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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you know that little can of spray-paint like the 3x the size of a chap-stick that came with your car or can probably buy anywhere? i bet you're afraid to identify one girl who needs a neon-pink swastika on the back of her dress and make her the belle of the ball. that'd be cake in anywhere loud, dark and with people turning away to order drinks all the time. 3-5 seconds to have muffy from iowa live the rest of her life wondering how she went to her childhood dream of being a playboy model to being the "hate-crime-bunny" for life. you can always do the racial-slur or recognizable-symbol of intolerance depending on what the crowd would take the most umbrage to.
you're ashley blue dude. if you're not going to shoot out tv's and punch photographers more often you should at least make some lingire-model with a painted-on face cry and possibly off-herself in shame later. take pictures, please.
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#157664 - 04/05/06 09:01 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Registered Sex Offender
Registered: 04/16/04
Posts: 2415
Loc: On the Mia Rose bandwagon
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I'd like to see Pamela Peaks show up for this.
_________________________
" Bitch, not even a dumptruck full of Gucci bags would get me to do you. "- Gia Jordan response to pornactorforhire
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#157666 - 04/06/06 05:17 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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ADT regular
Registered: 08/25/05
Posts: 19
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Make up often does not matter because about 20% of the female talent shows up with faces tore-up by meth use.
But I guess Playboy weeds those girls out.
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#157667 - 04/06/06 06:13 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 01/18/06
Posts: 1283
Loc: SoCal
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Are these bitches so stupid that they need to be told before hand not to show up crusted with cum?  I thought Playboy was above skanks.
_________________________
I'd rather be ignorant than stupid.
Ignorance implies a lack of knowledge which is easily correctable through education.
Stupidity implies an inability to learn.
Therefore; ignorance is temporary, stupidity is forever!
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#157669 - 04/06/06 06:20 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
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You'd be surprised at how clueless some girls are. I've actually had to send girls to the bathroom to shave their pussies, legs, and armpits because they were too drugged out to remember or care to do so. Those are the girls that I never hire again.
_________________________
I really try to retain a respectful distance from my models, even when I'm lubing up their pussies.
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#157670 - 04/06/06 06:24 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 01/09/06
Posts: 304
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Quote:
Quote:
Are these bitches so stupid that they need to be told before hand not to show up crusted with cum?
I thought Playboy was above skanks.
think about that... they hired Ashley...
longshot, list five professional accomplishments that you can claim. oh wait, you can't because you're a complete failure at life and your defense is that you're a "rebel"
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#157671 - 04/06/06 06:27 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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i'll show you mine if you show me yours.
_________________________
Theres a great big beautiful tomorrow...shining at the end of everyday.
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#157672 - 04/06/06 06:34 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 01/09/06
Posts: 304
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Quote:
i'll show you mine if you show me yours.
1) student senator and pro temp
2) intern with ussa
3) student member of and volunteer with american association of university women
4) student ambassador
5) oh wait you dumb faggot, i'm 19. you're 24 and think that's an excuse for being unsuccessful and lame. does "failed male porn talent" go over well on your resume?
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#157673 - 04/06/06 06:55 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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#157674 - 04/06/06 07:05 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Human Garbage
Registered: 07/05/04
Posts: 1545
Loc: In the tree outside Gia Jordan...
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First this Quote:
HA! those arent the real world sweetie, you'll learn that soon enough.
then this
Quote:
1) general manager of two porn companies (admittedly should never have left the first)
2) directed 3 movies.. shot about 10 others.
3)was an exclusive performer to a company
You realize porn doesn't really count as "real world" right? People suck at porn all the time, you did it better, just less frequently. I commend your quality of sucking over quantity of sucking.
_________________________
If cum was concrete, Quasarman would have a four lane freeway going down his throat. - pariah
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#157675 - 04/06/06 07:09 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
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#157676 - 04/06/06 07:11 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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Quote:
First this
Quote:
HA! those arent the real world sweetie, you'll learn that soon enough.
then this
Quote:
1) general manager of two porn companies (admittedly should never have left the first)
2) directed 3 movies.. shot about 10 others.
3)was an exclusive performer to a company
You realize porn doesn't really count as "real world" right? People suck at porn all the time, you did it better, just less frequently. I commend your quality of sucking over quantity of sucking.
thank you, I do try...
as for the first part... well no shit, why do you think i listed the rest of it.. that was just to make a point...
porn is far fromthe real world... but its closer than college. Shit, try juggling all three, ive been doing a normal job the whole time i've been in porn, and college.
_________________________
Theres a great big beautiful tomorrow...shining at the end of everyday.
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#157677 - 04/06/06 07:13 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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#157678 - 04/06/06 07:17 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
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#157679 - 04/06/06 07:21 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 01/09/06
Posts: 304
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Quote:
porn is far fromthe real world... but its closer than college. Shit, try juggling all three, ive been doing a normal job the whole time i've been in porn, and college.
hey longshot, an accomplishment is something that helps you, not hurts you and renders you completely useless. you (or rather, Google) bring shame upon whoever is stupid enough to actually associate with you, so good luck. i am really excited to see what you'll be doing when you're thirty. i have a feeling keiko will be on maged's list (if her uterus isn't so fucked up from all the std-induced ectopic pregnancies/spontaneous abortions)
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#157680 - 04/06/06 07:26 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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Quote:
Quote:
porn is far fromthe real world... but its closer than college. Shit, try juggling all three, ive been doing a normal job the whole time i've been in porn, and college.
hey longshot, an accomplishment is something that helps you, not hurts you and renders you completely useless. you (or rather, Google) bring shame upon whoever is stupid enough to actually associate with you, so good luck. i am really excited to see what you'll be doing when you're thirty. i have a feeling keiko will be on maged's list (if her uterus isn't so fucked up from all the std-induced ectopic pregnancies/spontaneous abortions)
way to avoid the rest of the accoplishments and the fact that i did more than you can claim before i hit 20. that google search only brings up my stage name... but, my employer knows and doesn't care. At 25 i will be living in Europe... what will you be doing? You should concern yourself with that more.
And yes, we do plan on spitting out a rugrat or two... its a noble job. She enjoys the role of woman.
_________________________
Theres a great big beautiful tomorrow...shining at the end of everyday.
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#157681 - 04/06/06 07:28 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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Quote:
[
Yes, I noticed you were trying to make her look stupid. I hate to break it to you "sweetie", but it isn't working.
no, i refer to all women as sweetie, or darling, or something of that nature... if it was directed soley at her i would think of much worse things.
_________________________
Theres a great big beautiful tomorrow...shining at the end of everyday.
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#157682 - 04/06/06 07:33 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 01/09/06
Posts: 304
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
porn is far fromthe real world... but its closer than college. Shit, try juggling all three, ive been doing a normal job the whole time i've been in porn, and college.
hey longshot, an accomplishment is something that helps you, not hurts you and renders you completely useless. you (or rather, Google) bring shame upon whoever is stupid enough to actually associate with you, so good luck. i am really excited to see what you'll be doing when you're thirty. i have a feeling keiko will be on maged's list (if her uterus isn't so fucked up from all the std-induced ectopic pregnancies/spontaneous abortions)
way to avoid the rest of the accoplishments and the fact that i did more than you can claim before i hit 20. that google search only brings up my stage name... but, my employer knows and doesn't care. At 25 i will be living in Europe... what will you be doing? You should concern yourself with that more.
And yes, we do plan on spitting out a rugrat or two... its a noble job. She enjoys the role of woman.
i wager that you're not going to europe, you're not going to be anything, and you're going to die depressed and with keiko (which is worse than being alone).
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#157685 - 04/06/06 08:07 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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at 17, i organized weekly "fight-night" in my dorm where we'd make the younger kids and foreign kids fight in hockey helmets and gloves at like 2am so we could get fucked up and watch the goofiest kids we could find slug each other out of fear.
today, i'm training to be the manager of the entire returns department at best buy and get a huge employee discount. actually, that's a lie, i just don't think about my resume much and who the fuck wants to read resumes anyhow?
bragging about income on porn-boards or anywhere else is bad form man.
at least you didn't say you made 80,000 dollars and have a HUGE penis and your hot girlfriend loves .smart move, it just looked obnoxious instead of standard internet bullshit.
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#157686 - 04/06/06 08:10 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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i was using it as a reference point. Honestly i dont like to talk about my income anywhere... I don't like people to know how much i make at any time... Hell, Kei hardly knows how much i make... she just knows it's there. The point was, that it was more relevant to success than a few college achievements. Therefore it was valid to bring into the discussion.
_________________________
Theres a great big beautiful tomorrow...shining at the end of everyday.
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#157687 - 04/06/06 08:13 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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LOL, the fight club in the dorms thing is awesome though... i remember all the stupid, crazy shit i did back then. Which sometimes i wish i didn't because i fear the subpeonas coming one day...
_________________________
Theres a great big beautiful tomorrow...shining at the end of everyday.
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#157690 - 04/07/06 12:58 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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Hasselhoff is a god everywhere...even puppies worship him... 
_________________________
Theres a great big beautiful tomorrow...shining at the end of everyday.
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#157692 - 04/07/06 01:32 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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me and david on the beach...
_________________________
Theres a great big beautiful tomorrow...shining at the end of everyday.
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#157694 - 04/07/06 02:00 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Demon Spawn
Registered: 07/07/04
Posts: 3178
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YEEESSSSS!!!!!
I uploaded this to my post Jim so it could be preserved for future use.
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#157695 - 04/07/06 02:41 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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i just had a lolercaust...
i was just about to post this one
_________________________
Theres a great big beautiful tomorrow...shining at the end of everyday.
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#157696 - 04/07/06 02:50 PM
Re: Grooming Instructions for Playboy TV Talent
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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me and the Hass, with Scarlett Johansen.
_________________________
Theres a great big beautiful tomorrow...shining at the end of everyday.
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#157697 - 04/07/06 03:05 PM
Hasselhoff and I
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 12/22/03
Posts: 1715
Loc: Everything for the people, not...
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me hass and KITT 05...
_________________________
Theres a great big beautiful tomorrow...shining at the end of everyday.
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