Well, try rubbing one out to Goldie Hawn during Laugh-In. Every time I would get close, fucking Ruth Buzzi would come on screen and fuck it all up for me.
After Goldie, there was Jeanie and the brunette daughter on Petticoat Junction. bobbie jo bradley (I still get wood watching TV land. Ever check out the wife on Mr. Ed?)
Once the miracle of cable was blessed upon my household, it was scrambled cable porn and maybe some Italian Carlo Ponti movie with side boob. (Mmmmm, side boob....arrghhh)
But I digress.
Once I turned 15, I began to sneak my mom's car out after midnight and go into town to the yellowfront bookstore. There, I would shoplift 8mm loops from Swedish Erotica. Holmes, Deserie Cousteau, Seka, Aunt Peg, Anette Haven. I had about a dozen 8mm color clips and I would wear them out. I think the clerks must have let me get away with swiping the shit. I was probably bringing them business with all the chickenhawks.

Good call on Loni Sanders and Ali Moore. Ali Moore had the best BJ technique! Her mouth would wrap around and you could see the tongue moves and suction.