I have, at all times, remained in control of my sexual urges on this site. I'm proud of having never said "I'd bang the fuck out of that!" and never once has appeared in one of my posts.

But I lose control when I see Sharpie. I don't know what it is, but my stomach gets all twisted and I... I... I don't know what's happening. Could it be that this... is what love feels like?




I don't know what it is, but I want to go home and listen to Paula Abdul and pour out the canticle of my heart in blank verse and couplets. You've ruined me for all other Nazi hunnies, Sharpie Girl. Ruined.