Sometimes I feel like I'm dead. I go days without leaving my house. Unless I'm going to work, I don't need to go out. I decide I need to save currency, and the best way to do that is not leave the house. Then I will not be tempted to buy anything. I keep the shades drawn, so no one comes to my door. I let the voice mail pick up the phone, and I simply check the messages later. If it's important, they will leave a message. So there are days where I am, essentially dead.

If I were to die, I would like proper warning. I need my affairs in order. Mainly, I need to discard my journals, which contain thoughts I don't want my family to know about. I also would ditch my porn, so my family would not know my sexual tastes. My hope is to outlive my entire family, so that when I die, the people who discard my things will be strangers that don't care about my journals or want to seek any insight in to me. They can have my porn if they wish.

hey allover hows it going ?

And i die everytime you post

Although I'm not sure of the relevance of your question to "General Porno Talk," I consider you an innovator and will, accordingly, grant you respect. I consider yours to be a truly profound question.
Existentialist philosophy posits the idea, among others, that it is the duty of the truly heroic man to perservere in spite of the lack of obvious meaning in the universe. Porn, perhaps more so than other expressive media, shakes one's faith in an orderly universe, presenting a world where it is de riguer that nubile, young does such as your beloved "Aurora Snow" should be defiled by men far beneath their station.
True consciousness is a heavy burden, gentle soul, and for one as sensitive as yourself, porn will be only an irritant. It is my intent to, once more, seek solace in the arms of a good woman whom I might recognize as my counterpoint.
Until then, I leave you with the words of Hemingway:

No, thank you," said the waiter and went out. He disliked bars and bodegas. A clean, well-lighted cafe was a very different thing. Now, without thinking further, he would go home to his room. He would lie in the bed and finally, with daylight, he would go to sleep. After all, he said to himself, it's probably only insomnia. Many must have it. :

Every day, my friend...every day.

This is the end,
Beautiful friend.
This is the end,
My only friend, the end,

Of our elaborate plans, the end,
Of everything that stands, the end,
No safety or surprise, the end,
I'll never look into your eyes...again.

Can you picture what will be,
So limitless and free,
Desperately in need of some stranger's hand,
In a desperate land.

Lost in a Roman wilderness of pain,
And all the children are insane.
All the children are insane.
Waiting for the summer rain, yeah.

There's danger on the edge of town;
Ride the King's highway, baby.
Weird scenes inside the gold mine.
Ride the highway west, baby.

Ride the snake, ride the snake.
To the lake, the ancient lake, baby.
The snake is long, seven miles
Ride the snake; he's old, and his skin is cold.

The west is the best.
The west is the best.
Get here, and we'll do the rest.

The blue bus is callin' us.
The blue bus is callin' us.
Driver, where you takin' us?

The killer awoke before dawn, he put his boots on; he took a face from the ancient gallery, and he walked on down the hall. He went into the room where his sister lived, and then he paid a visit to his brother, and then he...he walked on down the hall, and, and he came to a door, and he looked inside
Father, yes son, I want to kill you...Mother...I want to...

C'mon baby, take a chance with us.
C'mon baby, take a chance with us.
C'mon baby, take a chance with us.
And meet me at the back of the blue bus,
Doin' a blue rock,
On a blue bus,
Doin' a blue rock,
C'mon, yeah.

Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill

This is the end,
Beautiful friend.
This is the end,
My only friend, the end,
It hurts to set you free,
But you'll never follow me,
The end of laughter and soft lies,
The end of nights we tried to die.

This is the end.

(unless I can bang Christie Brinkley )

Hey Willie D, are you singing in the rain?

RIDE THE SNAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake

Bornyo, yes, I'm diggin' the rain too. Hallelujah!

First question....
Dead from fucking..or fucking dead???

Every day I get up with the same wish, that today will be the last day.

Bart : A man drink like that and he don't eat, he is going to DIE.

Waco Kid : When?

I wish that when my time comes I die by firing squad live on TV