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#140616 - 01/16/06 03:56 PM
xpt bakesale
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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so here are the discriminating financial requirements to buy like 20 hours of ksex-time a month. i say we have kyoto read his snuff-post 100x a month, it's like the cost of getting your oil and tranny-fluids changed. wankus, it's time to see how desperate you are, bitch. Ksex ad rates, you couldn't spend a grand if you tried
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#140617 - 01/16/06 04:39 PM
Re: xpt bakesale
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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That is a great bargain, if anyone hears it.
I wonder if they censor the ads at all? I notice Wankus reads some of them. Maybe we could get Tyler to read "Wankus is a douche" 200 times a month. As bad off as they are, I'm betting thats a "yes".
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#140618 - 01/16/06 05:06 PM
Re: xpt bakesale
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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Let's do this right, I kick in the first $786.43, and I volunteer to write a 10 page (XPT Type style and size) white elephant on a topic loosely encompassing the relationship between porn, bodily fluid metaphors and the defenestration of Prague, to be read by Wankus non-stop for the month of March (with a special Gaelic Version on March 17 by guest PJ Irish Midget), whereby Wankus can actually do that ridiculous "WTF?" expression and have it mean something...
What I really want to know is WHO would base a discretionary spending decision on anything they might hear on KSEX? If my entire body was covered in Herpes simplex 17 and I was oozing pus just breathing, and I heard on KSEX of a miracle drug approved by all the world countries' medical societies as a sure fire cure, I would wait until I heard the ad/endorsement on Howard Stern before I made the purchase. WTF???
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#140619 - 01/16/06 06:08 PM
Re: xpt bakesale
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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somebody needs to send him a sealed bottle of semen, marked "diet shake", and say he has to chug it during the commercial.
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#140620 - 01/16/06 06:44 PM
Re: xpt bakesale
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Someone should integrate this idea with the Pamela Peaks Cooking Show.
Btw, I was looking up my test in 'the system' and stumbled upon Pamela Peaks test. Yeah, she's negative for everything, then again the industry doesn't test for delusions of grandeur or melanoma. The system is only referenced by birth names not stage names; thus, she must have legally changed her name. Stranger than fiction was the birth date listing her as 24.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#140621 - 01/16/06 06:49 PM
Re: xpt bakesale
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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Quote:
Someone should integrate this idea with the Pamela Peaks Cooking Show.
My affection for you is strong, Ms Jordan. You rule.
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#140622 - 01/16/06 06:50 PM
Re: xpt bakesale
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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24? unless she's a survivor of chernobyl, you need to be SERIOUSLY questioning the accuracy of what that junkie sharon mitchell's spitting back at you. for your health, dawg, none of us want to see you on the next quar. list jordan. that woman's 24 like arab's a nursery-school teacher, start questioning that data.
Quote:
Someone should integrate this idea with the Pamela Peaks Cooking Show.
Btw, I was looking up my test in 'the system' and stumbled upon Pamela Peaks test. Yeah, she's negative for everything, then again the industry doesn't test for delusions of grandeur or melanoma. The system is only referenced by birth names not stage names; thus, she must have legally changed her name. Stranger than fiction was the birth date listing her as 24.
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#140624 - 01/16/06 10:14 PM
Re: xpt bakesale
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Registered Sex Offender
Registered: 03/12/03
Posts: 2458
Loc: I'm the fucker behind the curt...
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Quote:
Btw, I was looking up my test in 'the system' and stumbled upon Pamela Peaks test. Yeah, she's negative for everything, then again the industry doesn't test for delusions of grandeur or melanoma. The system is only referenced by birth names not stage names; thus, she must have legally changed her name. Stranger than fiction was the birth date listing her as 24.
I confirmed this in LabDat, and I must say I am a little disturbed. Why is Pamela Peaks allowed to use false information in that system? I doubt she has legally changed her named to Pam Peaks, and that's obviously not her real birthdate. What gives? Sometimes I really question the stuff that AIM lets go on...
Malice
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#140625 - 01/16/06 10:40 PM
Re: xpt bakesale
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 12/10/05
Posts: 55
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In my experience, women of such rare physical beauty are often afforded preferential treatment. I'm afraid it is a double standard you must learn to accept.
_________________________
"just a sack with a hole in it that cums" (Blue qtd. in Jordan).
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#140626 - 01/16/06 10:45 PM
Re: xpt bakesale
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Porn Icon
Registered: 02/04/05
Posts: 3499
Loc: The Dirty: 480
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#140627 - 01/16/06 10:51 PM
Re: xpt bakesale
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 10/26/05
Posts: 319
Loc: Outskirts of Parts Unknown
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Quote:
so here are the discriminating financial requirements to buy like 20 hours of ksex-time a month. i say we have kyoto read his snuff-post 100x a month, it's like the cost of getting your oil and tranny-fluids changed. wankus, it's time to see how desperate you are, bitch.
Ksex ad rates, you couldn't spend a grand if you tried
My question is, do they actually go out and try to recruit sponsors and advertisers?
I mean, that's what 95% of radio is nowadays. Playing Herb Tarlik and calling every guy just off the boat who opened some dumpy gyro place down the street trying to con him into thinking your 5,000 watt AM station that runs local high school softball games and fills the remainder of time with awful rightwing El Rushbo minus the oxycotin ripoffs like Mike Gallagher that suddenly gets overpowered when the sun goes down by the spanish station working one over on the dial, is the hot place to advertise and all the kids in town will wanna hang out there like it's the Peach Pit if you buy time on their "hip" station.
But internet radio is akin to shouting out your window to draw an audience. I mean, what the fuck can the "ad wizards" at KSEX be bringing to the table to convince some fledgling company that they need to appeal to a bunch of housebound living in momma's basement mushrooms who have the goddamn station streaming all day and pleasuring themselves while the neighbors wonder what the fuck those noises are. I mean, if you are a member of the sales department at KSEX (no, no please.......STOP FUCKING LAUGHING.....GET UP OFF THE FLOOR AND JUST PLAY ALONG WITH ME!!!!) do you actually pull out a tape of some of the PJ's and say "Well, here are two of our most popular on air personalities, Lorrainiac and Cuzfucker, and boy, I'll tell you, the big boys in L.A. would love to have these two in morning drive but they can't have 'em cause we got 'em. They make Stern and O&A look like Mother Angelica" and then start playing that shit with that screaming idiot woman who proves that in fact, women should stay the fuck off radio, and in fact most likely BE SHOT if they sound and talk like that?
I admit, I clicked on there two or three times to hear the trainwreck that is Cytherea go off on Gen Padova or whatever meth dealer she's pissed at this week, and I was shocked (SHOCKED) to find there were ads on there for things non-sex related that most likely the "MOM I'M LISTENING TO MY COMPUTER I'LL EAT MY FUCKING DINNER LATER, BITCH!!!" crowd will use as an intermission to go wipe the dingleberries off their crotchsweat soaked chair. Whoever is buying ad time down there, man, find the CEO of those companies and start telling him about this great acre of land you've got down in New Orleans that just went beachfront in August.
Seriously......they aren't serious over there, are they?
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#140630 - 01/17/06 01:47 AM
Re: xpt bakesale
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Whoremaster
Registered: 10/21/05
Posts: 2710
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Quote:
That is a great bargain, if anyone hears it.
I wonder if they censor the ads at all? I notice Wankus reads some of them. Maybe we could get Tyler to read "Wankus is a douche" 200 times a month. As bad off as they are, I'm betting thats a "yes".
Wow...if we could just get 110 XPTers to pony up $5 each, we could have some real fun here. I tend to agree with you that they are so desperate that they wouldn't be able to turn it down either.
'This is a public service announcement from xxxporntalk.com and JM Productions: Wankus is...' and just take it from there. 
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(yes im aware im filling garfields shoes of the smiley responses) but this one speaks for itself. 
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