Yeah, and you said something about throwing things at a particular girl presenter. :-)

Rammstein. Definitely.

Du riechst so gut
du riechst so gut
ich geh dir hinterher
du riechst so gut
ich finde dich
- so gut
ich steig dir nach
du riechst so gut
gleich hab ich dich

Yup. If you non-German readers only knew how fucking hot that lyric is. He's singing about fucking a woman from behind, because he likes the way she smells, in an animalistic, overtly primal way. If you hear the song, or see the video, no translation is needed.

Of course, there's Bestrafe Mich, or "Punish Me", about him wanting to be dominated. For those who don't know this band, run, don't walk, and get the dvd Live Aus Berlin, and tell me this kind of stage show wouldn't be what the AVN Awards show needs.

Oh, how the Awards Show could be spiced up. How about some fucking aphrodisiacs on the table? Raw oysters on the half-shell. Asparagus. Camembert cheese and truffles. CHOCOLATE! Fire artists like Jada Fire, no not THAT Jada Fire. My friend Jada Fire: http://www.jadafire.com. Strippers with kick ass bods. Hardcore in the film clips. Quasi-Cirque du Soleil acts that go beyond Zumanity. And bring in more girls to fill the front rows. Next year, I hope to bring in a couple of girls with me, like Misty May, whom I adore.

God this thing was tame. I enjoyed myself. But I thought I was at an awards banquet for hockey players again. All we were missing were the parents, and girls drinking Shirley Temples. This is about fucking. So where's the sex? Where's the meet on the bone? And why aren't the waitresses sexed up like the ones on the casino floor?

KN