I know Luke only by his writings and have no idea how much of his real personality shines through, but it seems to me that Holly, being a somewhat well adjusted person, may be a bit weary of someone with a habit for obsessive behavior in a relationship. Ask your self some hard questions. Like: Why do I hang around the fringes of porn when I could probably make more money working at a McDonalds? I think you'll see that maybe it's the porn girls that keep you coming back. That you secretly desire the fucked in the brain girls who are looking for that obsessive pimp figure in their lives. Just my 2 cents, condolences on the relationship. I do have a bit of advice to help get you through, a few words my father gave to me to help ease the pain. "You need to find a girl who looks just like her, nail her, then dump her."