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I was supposed to have a 1 pm lunch with Taylor Rain Wednesday afternoon at Jerry's Deli, but Rain was a no-show. I called Keith O'Connor, who set up the interview which was going to be a career retrospective because Rain announced this week that she was retiring. O'Connor's asking me how the interview went. I said it didn't, that Rain never showed. O'Connor's acting like he can't believe his ears saying that he had talked to Rain right before one and she was apparently on route to the deli. Voicing even more concern, O'Connor said he was trying to call Rain, but she wasn't picking up the phone. Also of concern was the fact that Rain, according to O'Connor, had a check for Norman Bentley who began shooting the company's movie Runway in Hollyood today. I had planned on covering the shoot but switched gears to accommodate the Rain interview.

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I don't know who's dumber here:
1. Gene Ross, for thinking stoner Rain would actually do something on time and without being completely blitzed on crack and hippie lettuce,
2. Keith himself, who would trust such a dumb whore with his company's money.
3. Taylor AA Rain herself, for pissing off her future ex-husband because she needed to sit on the street corner and listen to "White Rabbit" over and over while downing a bag of Cheetos. And you know that, if that check was of any substantial size, Taylor Pot-her's dome full of meth flakes and bong resin was working in overdrive on a stoner "master plan" to roll up to the local Wells Fargo, cash that check and take off for the Old Pueblo. All chronic stoners have these delusions of intelligence. Add this one to Rain's already long list:
1. I will be a good porn director
2. I will be a good mother
3. I will be able to lay off the bong for 9 straight months.
4. Getting engaged at Starbucks is romantic
5. I can talk ebonics 'cause of my hella mad white middle-class street cred, yo dawg!