Important news! See the following genuine news article:

"Researchers have discovered that a 10 minute ogle at women's breasts is as healthy as half an hour in the gym. The 5 year study of 200 men was performed by Dr. Karen Weatherby who wrote in the New England Journal of Medicine: "Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a well endowed female is roughly equivalent to a 30 minute aerobics workout. There is no question that gazing at breasts makes men healthier"
"Our study indicates that engaging in this activity a few minutes daily cuts the risk of a stroke and heart attack in half"
"We believe that by doing so consistently, the average man can extend his life four or five years"