If it's bleeding, it's from boredom and lack of amusement.

Now run along you Purple Shirt Metrosexual and use a douche to clean out your bleeding ass then stick a tampon in it. Go tell your buddies over a cappuccino how in touch with your feminine side you are.

I'll be drinking whiskey and smoking a cigar. Bitch, you are going to shove the used cigar but up your but when I'm done. Make sure you have your purple shirt on.

When you are ready to give up the Metrosexual lifestyle we can drink whiskey and smoke cigars together.