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Im going to africa for 4 months next week, doing work with a small village and i doubt they have net access, Im looking for regs i like to handle cage duties while im gone. Post here or send me a pm if interested.

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Im looking for regs i like

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See! This is what happens when people change fucking SNs like a 2 yr old's diapers. There used to be some posters here who I liked a lot, but now they are AWOL. Ergo, with all due respect to Bornyo, we are stuck grasping for straws like Slut Wife and her 'lukewarm' kisses.

Fuck it, ask Bishop, he's at home a lot no doubt with a new little Breast Milk Demon to watch Breast Feed....holy shit I am 58% erect after that imagery flash....

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Where is James, goddamnit?

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No shit.I miss that dude.

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Hey Monkey Y don't U just have an intercage election to vote Your temp(it'll B funny everyone will nominate someone else b/c nobody wants to do it)

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Hey Steroid, how much has your girlfriend changed since the pic that is my avatar?

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Im going to africa for 4 months next week, doing work with a small village and i doubt they have net access, Im looking for regs i like to handle cage duties while im gone. Post here or send me a pm if interested.

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Where is James, goddamnit?

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No shit.I miss that dude.

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I'll stick my neck out and nominate Random

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... or Zen could do it, too.

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the Cage was created because I kept moving monkey's posts.

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From: smelly monkey
Subject: It was YOU
Date: 7/22/2004

The whole time i was blaming zenman when it was you. I should've known, you are the thread mover not zenman, how was i so blind.

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The truth, of course, is that everyone was out to get the Monkey.

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I'll stick my neck out and nominate Random. I think he's a raw talent and won't use his pimp hand too harshly. Cleetus or Zen could do it, too.

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I'll stick my neck out and nominate Random. I think he's a raw talent and won't use his pimp hand too harshly. Cleetus or Zen could do it, too.

The stuff I posted about slutwife should be moved to the weht forum.

If the purpose is truly keeping the shit stirred then maybe JRV wouldn't be a bad choice.

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. . . and how about you, Bornyo?

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I wonder how many weird trolls will come out of the woodwork during his absence? Last time he left several monkey like trolls showed up.

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I wonder how many weird trolls will come out of the woodwork during his absence? Last time he left several monkey like trolls showed up.

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we already have a couple and monkey hasn't even finished packing yet.

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Oh he has packed.

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Cleetus!

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I'm going to walk South and stab Zen in the foot

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Cleetus!

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I'm going to walk South and stab Zen in the foot

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Don't forget to video it.

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we already have a couple and monkey hasn't even finished packing yet.

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I'll stick my neck out and nominate Random. I think he's a raw talent and won't use his pimp hand too harshly.

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I think he'd be the natural choice.

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Random is a good choice...he just needs to strategically incorporate the word FUCK a little more into his posts.

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I'll stick my neck out and nominate Random. I think he's a raw talent and won't use his pimp hand too harshly.

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I think he'd be the natural choice.

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Random is a good choice...he just needs to strategically incorporate the word FUCK a little more into his posts.

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Thanks, guys.

So what the fuck does "handle the cage duties" fuckin' mean? Is it just trying to keep the fuckin' threads up, or is it actual fuckin' mod duties? Monkey? Jeff? Tony? Liza? Fuck?

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....who's Liza?

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....who's Liza?

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Liza Minnelli. She was on t.v. when I posted that.

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I'm not too sure about Random though, I don't think that he could fill monkey's shoes even halfway. Having said that, you SHOULD select Random just to spite me.

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someone who posts more than 3 times in a month. Just a thought, dumbfuck.

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I post more than three times amonth, but mostly they suck.

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I'm not too sure about Random though, I don't think that he could fill monkey's shoes even halfway. Having said that, you SHOULD select Random just to spite me.

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Look Brandon, if Monkey has indeed left for awhile, The Cage won't be as good no matter who runs it.

We saw when Monkey left the last time how dead this board became. I simply said I'll try posting more topics if I can, and that was partly because with posters here like you who literally contribute nothing, this board could potentially be worse off than it was before.

Oh, and genius call on Grant by the way. If someone had to be elected to run mod duties, it may have to be someone who posts more than 3 times in a month. Just a thought, dumbfuck.

And if I ever did get mod powers for whatever reason, the first motherfuckin' thing I'd do is ask Tony to run an IP check on you so I could out your faggot-ass, Brandon.

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Give james some slicks to advise about methods of reducing the content of aspirin in vicodin (he actually posted about this, with detailed instructions. If Chloe had only read this in time...)

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Give james some slicks to advise about methods of reducing the content of aspirin in vicodin (he actually posted about this, with detailed instructions. If Chloe had only read this in time...)

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you know i was gonna lookl that post back up in light of recent events

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Let me know when you find it.

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Give james some slicks to advise about methods of reducing the content of aspirin in vicodin (he actually posted about this, with detailed instructions. If Chloe had only read this in time...)

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you know i was gonna lookl that post back up in light of recent events

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Let me know when you find it.

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Not even a moderator yet and the power has already gone to your head Random.. IP check me right now for all I care. Whenever you end up checking it, your going to feel stupid in the end. Until that time, remember that I own you and control your thoughts since I have you believing I am Brandon.

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I never said I wanted to be a mod, just that I'd try to post more. What I did say is if I did have mod powers, I would ask for an IP check. Funny thing is, even if you're not Brandon, you remind Bornyo and I of him. That's almost better than you actually being Brandon.

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Not even a moderator yet and the power has already gone to your head Random.. IP check me right now for all I care. Whenever you end up checking it, your going to feel stupid in the end. Until that time, remember that I own you and control your thoughts since I have you believing I am Brandon.

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I never said I wanted to be a mod, just that I'd try to post more. What I did say is if I did have mod powers, I would ask for an IP check. Funny thing is, even if you're not Brandon, you remind Bornyo and I of him. That's almost better than you actually being Brandon.

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Like a red headed step child.

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Not even a moderator yet and the power has already gone to your head Random.. IP check me right now for all I care. Whenever you end up checking it, your going to feel stupid in the end. Until that time, remember that I own you and control your thoughts since I have you believing I am Brandon.

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I never said I wanted to be a mod, just that I'd try to post more. What I did say is if I did have mod powers, I would ask for an IP check. Funny thing is, even if you're not Brandon, you remind Bornyo and I of him. That's almost better than you actually being Brandon.

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Brandon probably drives a Ferrari, Porsche or some other nice ride and I bet he has a nice house or condo too.

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you guys are getting off topic. God my funeral is gonna have some dorks at it.

do i drink the water or eat whats on the cheese cloth? how long does it last in the water and does it dissolve evenly? like can i make a big batch and sip it once a week? or do i need to do it for every pill right before? how little water do I need? Some girl I know tried crushing up morphine and dissolving it cause she was sick of having it stuck in her teeth and it turned into like a gel with blue bits in it, is it like that?

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AHA! Finally something I know about where my low Porn IQ won't be a...wont be a....a handicap...

First, The morphine your friend was chewing, then trying to dissolve was the extended release version of stuff, MS Contin. That stuff is only prescribed to people with either one foot in the grave due to cancer, or a machete in their bowels that can't be removed, or to those members of society smart enough to bullshit or blackmail the right doctors, about which I refuse to say anymore on the grounds that it may "tend to incriminate.."

You need to STOP taking Vicodin, silly girl, and switch to either vicoprofen, or come down with a "chronic cough that only responds to Hydrocodone Cough Syrup" (Like Tussionex or Hycodan). It's the tylenol in vicodin that will kill you .... same with percocet. Percodan is a better choice...

So what kind of cancer did you friend have?

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I believe she has anxiety cancer

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mmm, yes, symptoms are similar to my "Psychological Diabetes" that flares up from time time...Low Blood Euphoria.

Wow monkey would be pissed if he saw this thread's current tangent...We'd better stop before he calls the D.E.A.

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I believe she has anxiety cancer

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mmm, yes, symptoms are similar to my "Psychological Diabetes" that flares up from time time...Low Blood Euphoria.

Wow monkey would be pissed if he saw this thread's current tangent...We'd better stop before he calls the D.E.A.

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Yeah, all of his accounts may be reading this.

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I have a strong shield and mighty lightsaber. I have to attend to my dragons now. Get back to me.

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Wow, that's quite an imagination you have there.

I can almost see what's going on in your head:
"Hey look at me everyone, I'm a 50th level Dragonmaster and I just slayed a 2nd level elf and two 5th level dwarves.. hehehe.
It's so much easier to live in a fantasy world.. hehehe. Because in reality, I have no chance of getting a real woman."

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temp mod goes to grant michaels. Congrats. When i return, i expect the cage to have no more then 4% body fat, able to bench 320 and hit 44 on the vertical.

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temp mod goes to grant michaels. Congrats. When i return, i expect the cage to have no more then 4% body fat, able to bench 320 and hit 44 on the vertical.

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Monkey, I would never even dare to full your shoes! Besides.....there are those far more hungry to wield your Dark Powers! *cough* Random *cough*

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jrv temp moved to the cage

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jrv temp moved to the cage

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If that happened im going to make like Nacho and try as hard as I can to get the AIDS virus.

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jrv temp moved to the cage

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If that happened im going to make like Nacho and try as hard as I can to get the AIDS virus.

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jrv temp moved to the cage

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If that happened im going to make like Nacho and try as hard as I can to get the AIDS virus.

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Yeah, well I must admit that I don't know too much about jrv since I am relatively new here. I should probably go back and read some of his older posts before suggesting him. Maybe Da Burglar could switch to the cage and tantas' daddy could cover the shit list for a while, if both were willing to.

jamesn seems like he might be a good choice too, any opinions.

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I don't know what a Mod should do, but that has never stopped me before...ever. Is it like or this Maybe ?

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Being a mod here on XPT is kinda like being a "WWE referee...."

Monkey is not the "mod" of the cage...monkey is THE CAGE, hence the term the MONKEY CAGE. Choosing someone to replace monkey is more like the old "Guest Hosts" back when Carson was winding down his career.

THE CAGE:



What a "Mod" would do:

"Ok you guys I'm not gonna tell you again, No more obscene references to charitable organizations like "Jenna's Kids", and no more shooting paintball guns at Kyoto...!"

What Monkey Does:

etc etc etc

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Good post.

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Remember, I own you!

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His dislike for me will also make the next four months interesting and fun.. unless he illegally changes the wording in my posts for his own personal benefit which will get Tony involved and I'm sure Tony has better things to do.

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Random - seems to have the time for it, but I have yet to find humor in his posts since they are on the same level as South Park humor which is stale in my book.

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there are those far more hungry to wield your Dark Powers! *cough* Random *cough*

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You give yourself too much credit. Until yesterday or the day before, I never really thought anything of you other than your the definition of bland, no different to me than about two-dozen others here.

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At least I try. What exactly is it that you contribute?

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Here's a test: Post five topics here in The Cage that don't have anything to do with id's. Make them about anything other than another member. Let's see what your capable of.

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I offered to try to post more topics in Monkey's absense, that's all. It wouldn't kill other people to do the same.

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Quite frankly, I wouldn't want mod duties because it would obligate me to spend more time at a place that's becoming increasingly unentertaining.

There about a dozen regulars that I enjoy here that were around before me, and about a handful of newbies. The people I really like seem to posting less and less, which I don't believe is a coincidence.

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I used to love reading the bulk of the stuff here, and I would usually laugh harder than I would at any television show, but now there seems to be too much shit to schlep through just to get to the gems.

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Like Monkey said in another thread, The Cage needs to be cleaned.

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I don't take orders from you, you forget that you are my bitch as long as I control your thoughts.

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Why don't you give us a list of who should post and who shouldn't post commander Random, since your opinion on whose posts are worthy of reading is held in such high esteem here.

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Perhaps Tony should ban all but the dozen regulars that you enjoy here. The porn stars will flock to the site then.

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You think you're a lot smarter then you actually are and that's a slippery slope to be on.

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Random: Fly the Mod flag of porn, you're our man and I'll do my part
Big Worm: Eat a dick, like all of your posts do.

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Random: Fly the Mod flag of porn, you're our man and I'll do my part
Big Worm: Eat a dick, like all of your posts do.

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My guess is that your just another one of Random's retarded identities on this board so I won't waste much time with you.

Does everyone notice how 'John Floofin' posted exactly 1 minute after Random? It takes at least a couple of minutes to read that long ass post and then write up a response. So will Random be bringing out John_Walker next? This is a joke.

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And it always has been and ever shall be.
Ain't it fun?

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unless he illegally changes the wording in my posts

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Random: Fly the Mod flag of porn, you're our man and I'll do my part
Big Worm: Eat a dick, like all of your posts do.

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My guess is that your just another one of Random's retarded identities on this board so I won't waste much time with you.

Does everyone notice how 'John Floofin' posted exactly 1 minute after Random? It takes at least a couple of minutes to read that long ass post and then write up a response. So will Random be bringing out John_Walker next? This is a joke.

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Sorry, you must understand that unlike you I am able to read beyond the 6th grade level and can type with all 10 fingers.

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Random> <Coochie
^ Big Worm^

All three of y'all are pathetic trifling fags who can not wait to jump at the opportunity to lick Snot's nasty slit clean. I hope you cracka queers kill each other

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Random> <Coochie
^ Big Worm^

All three of y'all are pathetic trifling fags who can not wait to jump at the opportunity to lick Snot's nasty slit clean. I hope you cracka queers kill each other

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BlackGL, long time no see. Still sneaking onto your moma's computer while she's down on the corner tricken her ass for some rock. I heard her rates are down to a dollar a pop That's okay, one day she will OD and the state will get a hold of your ass, stuff you into a foster home until you get busted for something.. then you can enjoy all that Jailhouse hospitality that I'm sure your little ass will get.

By the way, just because I don't speak ebonics does it mean that I'm a cracka. I'm blacker then you little man.

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whats gonna happen is this threads gonna be 30 pages long and monkey will be back already.just make someone the mod alreay.

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By "back" I assume you think he went somewhere?

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Well I do enjoy Southpark. Any Coloradans in here catch the Casa Bonita episode? Funny shit. Funny accusation there too Worm, but we all know who the fraud is in here. I digress, I've had enough of whoever Worm and Frankie are and I'm washing my hands of 'em.

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Although I thank you Big Worm for your nod as the mod, I dont really think I could take on the cage as I don't post enough about porn related topics. In other news I thought cloning was banned in the United States, when the fuck did we clone the Wicked Witch of the West and name her Gen Padova?

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Random> <Coochie

^ Big Worm^

All three of y'all are pathetic trifling fags who can not wait to jump at the opportunity to lick Snot's nasty slit clean. I hope you cracka queers kill each other

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Im not going until the 17th. Maybe it can be a week to week mod thing, native americans and snakes in the grass need not apply.

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Im not going until the 17th. Maybe it can be a week to week mod thing, native americans and snakes in the grass need not apply.

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dude that's fucked up. i just got off the phone with malice a few minutes ago, and to settle the uprising of my people, the cage will now feature a casino area.

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That's actually kinda funny....considering I got drunk at Foxwoods last night and got lost cuz the place is so fucking huge...it's cool though when you are drunk in a wheelchair, no one bothers you, they figure you are crashing into trash cans, hot chicks and vending machines "cuz, well he's special."

If Monstar gets his casino, I want my own handicapped parking space:

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dude that's fucked up. i just got off the phone with malice a few minutes ago, and to settle the uprising of my people, the cage will now feature a casino area.

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Considering the kind of showgirls you'll have on staff, I'll bet the Reservation will have its own airport and monorail in a month.

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every one in tyat pic has perfected the bored look

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that's because everything bores you when you are kool.

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i'm planning on stealing monkey's passport and throwing it into daphne rosen's

cage where it will promptly be devoured. should i be killed by BlackGL before completing this mission, random's the obvious choice given he's as good as anyone at starting new threads and has paid his dues by being consistently funny. if he doesn't want it or wants help, i'm a big fan of coochie monster. big worm's a darkhorse given how new he is, but once the dust settles with the current feuds i'm convinced he'll prove a solid addition rather than a fake. given it's just a bad idea for grant or bishop to preside over the cage while working in the industry. bornyo's lack of interest and the unpredictability arab and i seem to post with , if monkey is really in need of a break those guys could all fill in capably. hopefully monkey's trip will fall through or be short.

does ivor have any interest?

daphne rosen, once again. she eats stuff.

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Why on Earth would anyone wanna go to Africa? Name one good reason? Theyve got AIDS, "Lions and Shit", ethnic cleansing, tribal warfare, Al Qaeda. People that go over to Africa and then end up on the Internet and get their heads chopped off, or go missing in the jungles, get no sympathy from me, its like watching people go over to Iraq and try to get rich, and they lose their heads. Im not condoning any of that stuff, but why put yourself at risk by going to one of those shitholes?

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It's a good cause monkey, I think that the only thing that really scares the shit out of me about Africa is the Ebola virus. I believe that Zaire, Uganda, and Sudan are the worst places for it but I don't think there has been any outbreaks in quite a while.

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I could be killed, for real. Place im going to isn't all that safe and thats not even considering lions and shit.

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Please be careful,but if not can I use your Acura (tm)to pick up chicks while you're dead this time?I promise to have all cleaned up in time for your ressurection

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I could be killed, for real. Place im going to isn't all that safe and thats not even considering lions and shit.

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Please be careful,but if not can I use your Acura (tm)to pick up chicks while you're dead this time?I promise to have all cleaned up in time for your ressurection

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Screw that, hump some bitches on that nasty ass couch of his whilst wearing the I love Vagina t shirt

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Random your like a little Chihuahua yipping at a rottweiler.

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i'm a big fan of coochie monster.

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Random your like a little Chihuahua yipping at a rottweiler.

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I love posts like these. Message Board Tough Guys, always funny in a sad sort of way. What’s next, telling me if you saw me in person you’d kick my ass? Or better yet, a “your mom is ugly” joke?

I used to think you didn’t like me because I called you on contributing nothing, but now I see it’s some something more... you love me. It’s obvious. Your whole life revolves around me. Without me you’d be at the search engine doing aimless detective work or dreaming up implausible scenarios that involve you being locked up with porn stars.

Even though I‘m flattered you’re so enamored with me, all you‘re doing is driving home just how boring you are. You’re a broken record. Your degree of blandness is so severe it’s almost difficult to take in. It’s like you’re the result of procreation between a Diet Rite and a Merchant Ivory film.

If you tried harder, I could actually learn to appreciate anything you have to say about me. I could laugh at an insult directed towards me if it was even the least bit original or funny.

Starting at 3:30pm today I’ll be out of town till at least July 5th. You can rejoice in knowing this place will be Random-free all those days. This is your time to shine. These people are counting on you to entertain them. Keep burning up the board with your scorching wit. Don’t let them down.

And regarding the Id Issue: I have no other id’s. None. Zero. Zilch. This is the last time I’ll address it because it's pointless. Tony has my permission to run an IP check, so ask him. I know you won’t, because finding out I’m not anyone else would be one less thing you’d have in your paltry arsenal of insults.

Goodnight Gracie. I’m done with you, but feel free to continue your dopey attack. The drab and valueless need role models, too. Plus it will only further prove you have nothing else to offer.

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Here we go, chapter 3. You know, I'm really starting to enjoy being inside your head. Can't wait to read the rest of the novel and good luck on selling it. Maybe you can remind us of how it got started. As far as the Chihuahua comment, it was to demonstrate to you how weak your little comments were and still are. Keep trying pal, I'm still waiting to be impressed.