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#350112 - 08/04/08 09:08 AM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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In the reliquary. NOW!!!! :bows to bornyo:
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#350113 - 08/04/08 09:13 AM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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the word "debauchery" has to be in there somewhere.
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#350114 - 08/04/08 10:50 AM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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I think that the absolute funniest aspect of this very creative post by Bronyo is that there is not a single response, or type of response I can make to this that doesnt make me look even more silly, really bad or detract further in some general way. In other words kids, this is what you call a quintessential "Checkmate"...objectively speaking, you can only salute (on the inside, to yourself...) and press forward.
The Shitlist though...? So much for my Open book policy....time to re-examine my life.
**Burg wraps a sandwich, his toothbrush, a small stuffed animal, a yoyo, a porn mag, the Bible and a pencil in a cloth and ties it to a stick and wheels out the front gate, looks back for a moment, and then heads down a sidewalk leading away from the XPT clubhouse into the cruel dark world....**
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#350115 - 08/04/08 10:57 AM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
Shit 
Edit: I think the dude is off his rocker/wheelchair over this, or something else. I tried to get him on AIM....no response. Did Holly or Gia have a run-in with Burg?
Edited by Bornyo (08/04/08 11:25 AM)
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#350118 - 08/04/08 08:00 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 10/19/06
Posts: 9958
Loc: fortified
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Why does "steering" bring me the most lolz?  Maybe we all took navigating the shopping cart for granted while a young Burg based almost his entire existence on it.? Ohh fuck.. I lol'd again. 
_________________________
i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#350121 - 08/05/08 01:59 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/19/04
Posts: 7888
Loc: Carpathian Mountains
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NICE! I just hope that the names can be erased as Burgs infatuations seem to fluctuate. Except for Holly of course.
_________________________
"Some say I'm lazy and others say that is just me.
Some say I'm crazy, I guess I'll always be"
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#350123 - 08/06/08 09:00 AM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Burg!!!!!! Come back!!!!!!
I blame Jim B and Darrah.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#350124 - 08/06/08 09:09 AM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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He said nothing to me about it when we PMed last week about the state of affairs.
Besides, doesn't he go through phases like this every once in a while? "Ghost of Burg?"
At any rate, I think the imagery he used says a lot about how serious (or not) he is:
Quote:
Burg wraps a sandwich, his toothbrush, a small stuffed animal, a yoyo, a porn mag, the Bible and a pencil in a cloth and ties it to a stick...
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#350125 - 08/06/08 09:11 AM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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pretty: Quote:
i talked to him on the phone...
I'm dumbstruck trying to imagine how a conversation between the two of you must go. Can you share a little bit of what you talk about?
(5 to 1 the topics covered fit within the categories I diagrammed above).
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#350129 - 08/06/08 01:09 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
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Quote:
Quote:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
i talked to him on the phone
hs fine
hes just moving on with his life
and wont be back to xpt
love, pretty
I dont believe that, he cant stay away, he'd finally die if he did that.
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#350130 - 08/06/08 05:58 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 10/19/06
Posts: 9958
Loc: fortified
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Bravo Sierra..
Burgs been fucken killing non-stop for a month.
He's off to Vegas or some shit to recharge his triple A's.
Atta Burg..
_________________________
i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#350132 - 08/06/08 10:10 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Human Garbage
Registered: 03/14/08
Posts: 1613
Loc: Liqour Hole, Kentucky
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Quote:
i just spoke with our much-beloved burglar and was asked to report back here on his behalf. as pretty mentioned, burg's had a lot on his plate lately, particularly maintaining the Burglar Foundation assets in this shitty economy, and some health issues. ALSO, it turns out that the Wheeled Prince of Debauchery has a newfound moral compass, discovered deep beneath a pile of empty beer bottles, stuck to the crotch of a pair of baby blue hooker panties. he is a changed burglar. like seriously. in fact, i think that during our whole conversation, he only used the word "hooker" twice. Ass creampies were not discussed. i have a feeling he may still check in from time to time. i for one really, really hope so.  
New found moral compass? He isn't going to join L-ke's fake Jew brigade is he?
_________________________
Being Canadian is not a disease. It just feels like one. TUP
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#350134 - 08/07/08 07:17 AM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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Quote:
Quote:
i just spoke with our much-beloved burglar and was asked to report back here on his behalf. as pretty mentioned, burg's had a lot on his plate lately, particularly maintaining the Burglar Foundation assets in this shitty economy, and some health issues. ALSO, it turns out that the Wheeled Prince of Debauchery has a newfound moral compass, discovered deep beneath a pile of empty beer bottles, stuck to the crotch of a pair of baby blue hooker panties. he is a changed burglar. like seriously. in fact, i think that during our whole conversation, he only used the word "hooker" twice. Ass creampies were not discussed. i have a feeling he may still check in from time to time. i for one really, really hope so.
New found moral compass? He isn't going to join L-ke's fake Jew brigade is he?
no, no, nothing like that. he's leaving the porn entirely out of his life and focusing on things.
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#350138 - 08/08/08 07:42 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
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Quote:
Burg has everyone's number. He's like the directory asssistance of porno. 
so so so true Willie, he has everyone's number and I think he's called everyone on XPT. Well all the females anyway. 
But he also likes to be a man and "speak to the men of XPT" inviting over for BBQ's, hanging out w/the porn industry peeps when he goes to California. But if remember right, he stood up JamesN, after he cleaned out his car and made room for him. He has a bad habit of that, a few people complained of him doing that.
BURG COME BACK, we miss you, and I for one miss your posts. I've always enjoyed them, no matter how long they were.
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#350139 - 08/08/08 08:37 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Registered Sex Offender
Registered: 07/09/06
Posts: 2362
Loc: St. Louis
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He never called me. I'm not complaining though.
_________________________
"Offer them what they secretly want and they of course immediately become panic-stricken."
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#350140 - 08/08/08 08:39 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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i think he called me once and my husband answered. fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk 
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#350141 - 08/08/08 08:56 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
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Quote:
i think he called me once and my husband answered. fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
HAHAHAHA I hope he was smart enough to say "Sorry, wrong number", please dont tell me he actually asked for you.
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#350142 - 08/08/08 08:58 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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i think he did a little telemarketing speech...
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#350143 - 08/08/08 09:05 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
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Quote:
i think he did a little telemarketing speech...
Good thinking. Burg always on his toes (well you know what I mean  )
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#350145 - 08/08/08 09:42 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/12/07
Posts: 367
Loc: WI
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I'm female and he never had my #
_________________________
" I have a like a 5 second rule for cum-- if it's been ejaculated from the penis and laying around somewhere for more than 5 seconds, I'm not touching it. I like my cum hot and fresh.
" ......Holly Randall
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#350147 - 08/10/08 07:30 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
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Quote:
I'm female and he never had my #
Did he ever ask you Exhibit?? Inquiring minds want to know, I know Im nosey, if it's none of my biz just say so, and I will understand. 
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#350149 - 08/11/08 08:25 AM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
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I had a dream about him last night-- I dreamt that I ran into him at a university where I was visiting a friend-- he'd just had an operation the day before, and already he could walk almost perfectly. He also had a girlfriend he was very excited about. He was a professor at the school so he brought me into his office to catch up. Before we could start a conversation my alarm went off. But the jist of the dream was that he was very happy. I hope that comes true for him in real life.
_________________________
I really try to retain a respectful distance from my models, even when I'm lubing up their pussies.
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#350150 - 08/13/08 12:14 AM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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Quote:
i think he called me once and my husband answered. fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
Actually I pretended to be the Pissed off husband of a woman I accused HIM of fucking around with....then after 2 minutes of verbal abuse, I said Ooops sorry, wrong number. Yes I am quick on my seat.
Quote:
I had a dream about him last night-- I dreamt that I ran into him at a university where I was visiting a friend-- he'd just had an operation the day before, and already he could walk almost perfectly. He also had a girlfriend he was very excited about. He was a professor at the school so he brought me into his office to catch up. Before we could start a conversation my alarm went off. But the jist of the dream was that he was very happy. I hope that comes true for him in real life.
 Does anyone else hear This Music after reading Holly's dream description?
Imagine my jaded-yet-still fragile Burg heart JUMP for a split second when i read a Holly -post that starts with "I had a Dream about him last night...." I'm thinking...<YESSS! Holly finally has come to grips with her fetish for cute crippled perverts, her desire to be with a man that is part Larry Flynt, part Hemingway and part Keith Ricards (without the musical talent)> But nooooooooo.....
Instead in Holly's dream, I have had some MIRACLE Faith-healing surgical procedure, I'm "happily Monogamous"(Who? Me???) with some unknown woman who is NOT-Holly who probably is out running up my AMEX Card at South Coast Plaza while I am blabbing TO Holly in my professors' office, in what has to be a repressed version of HOLLY's admitted fantasy of fucking the shit out of her professor!
jeez....
Still, thank you for the nice, "wholesome" thoughts and well wishes Holly... No matter how much of a closet slutty whore you try to be here at XPT, your sweet, kind loving personality somehow manages to emerge from the filth...
You know what's kinda spooky though....I recently agreed to volunteer my time 2 days a week this Fall at a College here in Connecticut for a couple Business classes dealing with self-employment issues, marketing and management, and disability employment practices. They asked me if I would need a special wheelchair friendly desk for this rinky dink little office they said I could have...now everytime I squeeze into that office I am going to imagine Holly sitting seductively on my desk inserting pencils into my pencil sharpener....
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#350151 - 08/15/08 06:51 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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#350152 - 08/15/08 08:20 PM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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of course, in my dream, you fucked me twice 
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#350153 - 08/16/08 05:53 AM
Re: I did a drawing of DaBurglars Brain
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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Quote:
of course, in my dream, you fucked me twice
Careful.....the Curse of Phlogiston lurks waiting to strike down any fucktard who wades too deeply into your imaginary ass....I better put on my all-terrain wheelie tires, and put some Golashes on my little fucked up Paws....
I am soooo gonna' debase, degrade, debauch and otherwise defile a totally Hott, as yet-to-be-identified stripper in some stripclub tonight....I am on a mission...I havent felt this (im)morally rambunctious about going to a stripclub since the "Days of Wine and ...Percocets...?" back at Club Paradise-Las Vegas circa 1999 back when they had the most gorgeous, CHEMICALLY impaired stable of stripper-whores who, provided you were even remotely cute/not hideous, would do anything...I mean A N Y THING...back in your hotel suite for 5 tablets of 5mg/325 Percs and some PF Chang Won Ton soup.
I definitely have taken My LAST 30 day whore sabbatical of my life, unless I find a stable romance somewhere along the way....seriously, Who am I kidding? I must Embrace my debauchery and who/what I am; I must LOVE me and my whoremongering ways, and justify it in my mind, much like a PORN whore does .... Besides, I now have a severe case of DSB, since Porn in general sucks too bad to jerk off and relieve the pressure....
FYI - I dropped my new "Moral Compass" down a toilet in a restaurant and I really dont want it back....Besides, Whores want it, they just do....if you have $$$, they'll do whatever, end of story. If you have $$$, AND you also happen to be personable, and even slightly cute and smell good, then it is not only "end of Story" but you get a couple footnotes as well.
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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