So, it's official. Pretty and I are gonna tie the knot. I have no idea when, or where, except to say that it will be goin' down in Vegas. I mean really, is there ANY other place to get hitched? Elvis will be there, and I hope you will to XPT. If you post here, read here, or troll here, you're invited. Electro, you can't come until you show this board your boobs. Just kidding. Or am I? As soon as I have a date, time, and place set up, I will post it here. If you want an actual hard copy invite, please Email me... dirtydeadz@yahoo.com and I will get it out to you when I have it. I must also take this opportunity to be the first to congradulate myself. I really could NOT have picked (lucked into is more like it) a better girl. Pretty, I love you and I can't wait...even though I have to.

-Keep It Dirty

...a special thanks to Gia Jordan for the nudges. Sometimes I need a little push, so thank you. I would still be "on the
market" if it weren't for you. Thanks alot! lol For real though, I can't thank you enough.

Wow, let me offer my congratulations on what must be the first XPT wedding.

Best wishes, as long as you don't have any kids.

Congrats, Dirty and Pretty! I'm still get can't over the fact that I facilitated a marriage on a porn board.

Your welcome, Dirty. You're a good guy. Take care of our little Pretty and feed her some vegan wedding cake.

Congrats, I hope you 2 are always as happy as you are today.

Is it?!?!?! That would be fuckin' F.R.E.S.H.!!! Thanks Coke, and hey, don't have any kids right back at ya!

-Keep It Dirty

When you roll out of Vegas up the 15 back toward Denver, you need to have cans tied to the back of your big rig with XPT Rules in the dust of the trailer doors. That would be a fine pic.

Wow...the coolest thread EVAR on XPT. Best wishes to you guys!!!

Gia:

LOL gia!!!

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When you roll out of Vegas up the 15 back toward Denver, you need to have cans tied to the back of your big rig with XPT Rules in the dust of the trailer doors. That would be a fine pic.

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YES!!!!

And Pretty, hide this news from your sugar daddy so he still keeps shelling out.

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ooooooooh thats the elvis chapel isnt it?
neato!


can i wear fishnets?

Lemme know and I will book my LA trip around it. Are you gonna be registered at JM productions?

Congrats!






^Random Troll boobs for Dirty. (I gots wedding phobia.)



<3


Hey Dirty, just remember, don't drink the Dew.

Dirty Deadz you lucky dog! I think you two will be a happy couple. Just make sure she keeps giving it up to you do you don't have to change your name to Dirty Pleads

You're getting married ????? Have you lost your fucking minds ?????

I had a buddy get married in Vegas. The chapel they used web cast their wedding to the guests. Best wedding I ever attended. I sat at home and drank beer while watching a guy I grew up with break down and cry like a bitch when he said "I do" . I didn't have to dress up, leave the house or deal with anybodies asshole relatives.

Vegas Wedding= acknowledgment that you are taking a huge gamble and will most likely lose.

Have you two picked out a china pattern? For those of us who wish to send gifts, where are you registered?

no doubt the lot lizard community is taking the news pretty hard, with a sadness in their eyes like ryan knox touring the washington monument.

-Chuck, Vegetarian fanboy

I can't tell if this post is meant to be serious. If it is I think it's great!!!

I cannot attend the ceremony but I wish both of you well from where I live.

All I ask is a few wedding pictures be posted. And the idea of the dust writing and the tin cans makes me happy.

WOW! I'm actually at a loss for words right now (no I'm not) and a little whelmed by the wonderful responses. Thank you XPT. These are all fantastic ideas as well, by the way, so keep 'em comin'! I was just gonna tie a few lizards to the trailer door (for later) and throw either a just married or a for sale sign on 'em. Maybe one of each.

-Keep It Dirty

...cuz I have found in my "travels" that dangling lizards from the trailer not only gets you mad props on the C.B. but it also prevents her from running away when you stop. Plus, she doesn't smell up the cab.

Could you realistically drag a bunch of cans from your truck?

I wanna watch the women on this forum plan a wedding. This is gonna be a hoot!

Hey, I got some stag films for the bachelor party.

-Chuck, Vegetarian fanboy

Is it blatent assholery to point this out?

"I'm still get can't over the fact..."

Me too! I'm still aback taken a self my little! I'll say it a thousand more times I'm sure, but thank you Gia. I read that one post and just kinda went "yeah, huh!"

Pretty- We're pickin' each other's wedding wear. No fishnets, no wedding, capishe?

Goat- I have always wanted Suitcase Pimp on my resume', right next to trucker, cowboy, clown, rockstar, mope, waiter, and most notably, carney, to name a few. Thanks for the "knighthood"

Lou- No bullshit, you are right on the $$$. My dad used to drop me at school in his freightliner crane. It gets you noticed, if nothing else. Hey, I still need a best man yo...

Corny- Actually, I'm gettin' married so I can take a break from fuckin'. You have NO IDEA what it takes to keep stride with a whore like Pretty. There was no diet, no veganism, no gym, no sweatin' to the oldies...it's all bullshit! I lost all my weight fuckin' keepin' pace with Pretty. fortyseventeen times a day wears on a man lol

Backdoor- Yes, yes we have.

Fiend- I'll make it happen and send out the link

Coke- I'm already registered here Nat'l Sex Offender Regisrty thanks for asking!

Mark- I'm getting MARRIED, so this is actually gonna pan out for them as an increase in my business. They're all pulling out each other's hair and punching their own teeth in to get a crack at a bridesmaid spot.

Conq- Yes, it's real and yes I'll have the lizards bungee corded to the back of my trailer hold beer cans.

Chuck- SWEET! I'll bring the "fat amish Dirty" clips with me for comic relief.

Now then, where to have the bachelor party, and who can we get to entertain at this fuckin' bash?!?!?! One thing is certain. No showers of ANY kind. That's how you...

-Keep It Dirty

...I knew you'd eventually show me your tits Electro. I hope my hair looks HALF that good on my wedding day. For real. I mean that.

Maybe you could get married at the JM Productions office

Its funny myspace seem to be doing a "married on myspace" theme at the moment, now XPT can do one as well

No, the wedding "happens in Vegas" so that it stays there, & The HONEYMOON goes down over at JM's office so that we can sell copies of it later for $39.95!

-Keep It Dirty

...JM Productions proudly presents "Pretty's Honeymoon Blowbang!" I mean, the possibilities are endless here.

...a sneak preview?



these two totally hitched it in the BUFF! Pretty, I think I just figured out what you're wearing along with the fishnets...

-Keep It dirty

...a garter belt, and that's it! Nude wedding Pretty, y'down?!

...and how do I KNOW that this will be in the plans somewhere as well?



...It's too obvious, and therefore, MUST be done...on a vegan cake of course. Gia, can you find out who makes vegan wedding cakes for me please? I think you're the go-to girl on this one.

-Keep It Dirty

i got married at that chapel you have the photo of. decent joint.

In Las Vegas, GO RAW makes cakes. I'm sure they can make a wedding cake. They're near Sahara/Durango, close to the fake lake.

Congrats to you both, really.

Oh, that's so nice of you to invite the trolls too! I love reading you and Pretty, you're 2 of my favorite posters on this board. If I was within spitting distance I would so be there.

I'm sure you already have contacts for party stuff, but if you don't and you want any of that tacky flashing and glowing and light-up and frozen penis and boob crap for your send-off parties send me a PM, you'll get it at cost.

Congrats, and good luck in your life together

really?
the elvis one?? thats awesome!
were going to that one right dirty?

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i got married at that chapel you have the photo of. decent joint.

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Hell yeah! EsPECIALly if they have a drive-thru. I'm still looking into bookin' our honeymoon sweet over at the Malice Palace, but if that falls through then we're goin' to Graceland, Graceland, Memphis Tennessee, I'm goin' to Graceland, Graceland...

-Keep It dirty

...you know Pretty, they actually have a Heartbreak Hotel out there in Memphis, right across the street from Graceland
on Elvis Presley Blvd. Seems a fitting joint for a honeymoon, no?

I've been to the Graceland Hotel, and it's a let down. It's not kitsch enough to pull off anything of visual impact. Just stay in Vegas. Do your Elvis chapel then head to the hotel, wreck the headboard with spit and blood, then venture out into the night for more debauchery as long as it ends up at the really cool punk rock joint The Double Down.

Ok, sorry Lou, but fuck you (huh huh, he said but fuck), I want Gia to be my best man! I too have actually been, and stayed, at the Heartbreak Hotel myself. I was underwhelmed at how much attention to detail they didn't pay. I love both name and locale, but I do think that a joint like that should put the Hard Rock Vegas to shame, and it's not even close. At least, the generic, million-of-a-kind room I was in didn't, but honeymooning there would sure tie in nicely with my diabolical plan(s) to spoil the pornwhore with my dirtseed, whom I shall name Elvis Metallica Angus Araya Wylde Cash Hendrix Garcia Kiss Hutchinson Deadz...the first. DAMN! That's a good name. Well, it's either that or "Dastard" Lee Deadz.

-Keep It "Dastard" Lee

Gia, somehow I know you'll be the one holding Pretty's hair for her...at the alter!

it's not a drive through. we got a "young elvis" to sing and present my wife. then the minister married the shit out of us. it was a nice ceremony and they were really cool people.

don't stay at some cheap ass shit hotel, right now prices in vegas are a steal because of the fucked up economy. i stayed at the palazzo for 99 a night in a concierge suite.

mandalay bay is nice too.

...The Honeymoon Suite.



-Keep It Dirty

Congrats to both of you and Best of Luck with Everything

Congrats.

Ï give it 3 years +- 1 year depending on the number of abortions.

This is xxxpt. Someone had to do it.